Should I continue to talk to him when I know he isn't for me or is there any hope that I could change him?

Question

I have been talking to a guy online for 2 months and we have went out 3 times. He is safe and sane and a nice guy overall. However he is cheap and this is a major turnoff to me because I have had more than my share of cheap men. I wouldn't mind continuing to be friends with him but since we did meet on a dating site we are both looking for someone for a relationship. Our last date, we sat and talked for 3 hours and he never once offered to get me a coffee or an icecream or anything. We later when to a nice restaraunt and only had chips and salsa and I can't eat salsa so I only had chips. I was starving. I enjoy getting together with him occasionally but can't help but find everyday a disappointment. How should I handle breaking off with him or is there a way to get him to be a little more generous? He makes a good salary and says in his ad that he wants a woman who lilke to be pampered and spoiled. I don't want to be mean to him but I am just not happy with his cheapness

Answer 1

You should never go into a relationship thinking you can change the other person. People might change but they change themselves and you can't make it happen. So you have to accept them the way they are, and if you can't accept this guy the way he is now, then all you can do is be friends and keep looking for someone else. He obviously has no idea of what he meant when he said he liked to "pamper' women--he said it to get attention but he doesn't know how to do it.

Answer 2

Hi there! Here is what I think. I think that this is unexpected due to the fact that he isn't portraying what he wanted to do as far as the pampering. I was also thinking that maybe he is testing who he dates, to see if she is really into him; other thoughts I have are that he could be really broke and wants to portray that he has $$$$$$$, you never really know, Sure you say that you think he a pass of an ok safe person. But how well do we really know people, even when we get to know them. The other thing is that it seems that you need aor should be wooed off your feet. Life is short and I think that since you said that you aren't really in to him that way you should break it off slowley. Like for instance he asks you out and your bored , tell him your busy if your goal is to break it off. But if you feel you need him as afriend you need to tell him you think you want just a frienship so that you could possibly have a true frienship......................and when you go out next time eat before you go..................Good luck!

Answer 3

you cant change him so just tell him to get ****** because he is not boyfriend material and he never will be

Answer 4

move on find a guy who will feed you properly.
he'll treat you better as well.