how do you REALLY know?

Question

for those whose tots are in nursery? i watched my 2 yr old through the door window who suddenly after two weeks of going started crying when i left him( i left him twice a week for 3 hrs to get him socialised- i was not working) i could not be seen from the door.

after 5 mins he was still crying uncontrollably, and no one of the 3 carers tended to him even though one young girl was sitting next to him writing, i "felt that there was something wrong so i went in and told the "supervisor" i was disgusted and was taking him home we left the room, and went outside she asked me to come and speak to her boss the head of nursery, on the way she said i would still have to pay the remainder fees!!!

i then spoke to the manager who gave me bull saying maybe i was not ready to let go!!( he is my third) i was 34yrs old at that time and was desperate for a break, also iam experienced and very perceptive, anyway what i want to know is how can we really trust others to look after our kids?

spot on folks! but some didnt read properly !

Answer 1

My husband and I ALWAYS worked opposite shifts when our son was little so one of us was always with him!!!! Its too damn scary out there now a days and the kids r way too young to even tell you if they r being abused! Just because the place has a liscense does NOT mean they r good to your child! Try using a family friend or relative or better yet- switch working hours so you and hubby are home with him at all times!!!!! Thats the managers COP OUT for not having any good excuse! Yank the baby out and never take him back!!!!! Hold him tight and love him always! Letting go? Hell my son is 15 and I will never ever let him go! Not in my heart or soul!

Answer 2

You cant be sure at all. However I would say there are some very good, caring nurseries. I worked in one many years ago.We would never have left a child without comfort. I think a better age for nursery is 3 years. At that age they are more able to tell you if they are not happy where they are. My grandson was deeply distressed in his first nursery, wouldn't eat or sleep and cried all the time. On the second week his mum removed him from there.Several weeks later she put him in another nursery that was recommended by a friend. He settled from the first day, he was eager to go, loved everyone there, and was very contented.Some children never settle in nursery and at that age they be happier at home, but it could be worth looking for a good one that someone else recommends. I think you can usually sense where your child will be happy and well cared for, a mother gets vibes, if you visit others trust your instincts, they are usually right.

Answer 3

Not a nice situation to be in i would have wanted to punch them..... I was lucky with my childcare the nursery was highly recommended and my daughter loved it there. The only thing you can do is ensure that you research the nurseries and speak to other parents whose kids are there, ask for government reports etc I also checked the turnover of staff and their age etc Some nurseries are only in it for the money 115quid per child.

Answer 4

I would look around for another nursery or preferably a child minder who could give your child proper attention
My sister took her son out of nursery as he kept coming home with bruises or his clothes ripped or something missing, but when questioned, none of the so-called 'minders' could tell her why. Half the time i think they're only bothered about chatting about last nights TV or organising their social lives. I know there are some good places out there, try going on word of mouth for your next place. Good luck

Answer 5

i work in a nursery myself and also have a son who's in a different nursery to me. i feel the same as you they don't pay attention to the children but there is nursery that do if i feel there is something wrong i will say so. i feel there is to many young ppl going into this job and don't care or know how to look after children when they are upset. you should report this to offsted. children should not be neglected

Answer 6

My one and only experience with a daycare setting was a nightmare. I chose to go back to college 6 months after my 2nd was born. My oldest was in kindergarten. During the three weeks he was in daycare, he came home (daily) with bite marks all over his body. These were human bite marks! Anyway over the 3 weeks, we counted over 100 of them. After reading them the riot act, they kept swearing it would be resolved. After it never did, I ultimately pulled him from the daycare, called CPS and reported it. I wont ever put any of my kids in that kind of setting again. It's stay home mom for me all the way through graduation!

Answer 7

It does them good to let them cry for a bit as long as you know there is nothing actually wrong. Otherwise they just learn to kick up a stink to get attention.
Did he settle down pretty much as soon as you came back?
If so, then the carers knew their job, and you were just suffering separation anxiety. (I've had it, it's not nice.)
If not, then maybe you were right and there was an actual problem.

Answer 8

thats why im a stay at home mom. it is hard getting by on one income but i do not trust anyone else with my kids. they are 2 and 6. i am waiting til my youngest one starts school and then i will start working again. they are just too precious to let strangers watch them. you did a good thing by taking your child out, but should not have to pay for anything!

Answer 9

I think you are right to be concerned. You really do not know what happens when you are not there. Have you spoken to other mothers and asked them how they feel about the nursery?

Answer 10

You can't really know. Some nurseries actually have cameras where you can watch them but other than that I don't see how you could know everything.

I take my kids to playgroups to socialize them.