Mixed Race Relationships?

Question

Thoughts on an mixed race relationship?
What are your guys thoughts on mixed race relationships? I am in one currently - I am a 21 year old British Asian female and my partner is white. We have been seeing each other for about 5 months whilst working in London. He is a mature, intelligent individual whom is well travelled and very respectful towards my culture. However when I told my parents of the relationship they were upset to say the least - and I feel this wouldnt' be the case if he was Asian. I've spoken to him about it - and his parents are very accepting of me

What are your thoughts? It is so fustrating!

Answer 1

Well, there was an old song I remember of which had the words, "It's the love that counts". Being an Asian myself (Indian), I know and have seen how the conservative parents go nuts at their choice of soulmate, and it doesn't surprise me anymore. I have also seen that non-asians are very interested and neutral on the same matter, and (unless the parents were rednecks) would see no objection to it. I've never really seen people on the basis of color, but I can understand what you must be facing. Believe me, if the guy you like was Asian, they'd probably nit pick and split hairs - caste (yes, the unspoken horror of casteism still exists if you're an Indian), famil, horoscopes and the like. Your parents would be more happy if you let them choose. But anyway, what really matters is you. Do you feel you have what it takes to bridge the gap. I do not mean just saying you're compatible with his personality I mean compatibility with every single facet of his life? And will be able to face the sometimes odd looks at the halls of schools when you go to a PTA with your children?Its your call on this one. As for me, I'm always open, and I always call a spade a spade.

Answer 2

Everyone prefers to live within their comfort zone. From the types of food we eat to the communities we choose to live in. It's all about what we were born and raised to believe or are used to. You're asking your parents to come out of their comfort zone and that will take some time. Your boyfriend's parents are perhaps a little less conservative in their thinking and can look past their own insecurities recognizing what is more important to them; and that's their son's happiness. Your parents will realize that too in time. Don't give up on this relationship; there's too little love in this world as it is. Be patient with your parents. Show them that you love and respect them; at the same time slowly reinforcing your own convictions and right to live your life. They will, hopefully, see that this relationship is not fleeting and the culture issue should diminish. If in time nothing changes with your parents; you will then have to choose. But when you do; consider that this is your life and as much as you feel you owe your parents, you must break free and move on...don't be afraid. Good luck!

Answer 3

It all depends on ow much u luv him.Ur parents are not going to live with u guys if u get married so the decision is urs to make.
If he loves u and respect ur culture, I c no reason y u shld not give him a chance cos of ur parents.Cheers.

Answer 4

i dont mean to sound critical but your parents are living in the past, asian to asian, black to black, white to white, indian to indian, and arranged marriages shouldn't be looked at as a rule anymore, love is hard to find so when you find it, keep hold of it no matter what race or culture the other person is from.

Answer 5

I myself am very pro mixed race relationships. you just have to tell ur parents he's a good guy and it's not about race. It's a good thing his parents accept you. besides, you're old enough to mak ur own decisions, your parents cant control you anymore. so do what you want to do! good luck!

Answer 6

My cousin married an Asian woman he is by the way white. They are very happy together and have two very beautifull children. She herself is a very lovely and succesfull woman. It shouldnt matter what other people think of it. If you two are happy and care for eachother go for it. Do what makes you happy.

Answer 7

baby girl, this is the initial shock. don't worry about it. ask your parent why? trust me they won't say it's because of the race. they just don't want you to get hurt. what you want to do is explain that you're happy with a decent man and that's all really matter. don't worry. your parents want to be happy and not get mistreated. just have a good talk with them.

Answer 8

It's fine I am Indian My wife English we have been married for 45 yrs. we have grandchildren with blond hair blue eyes.none of them look Indian. My families weren't happy to begin with but slowly changed.

Answer 9

I'm white, my husband Mexican, it took my mother to get over it about year and a half (I know, stubborn, eh?). We have two kids now and she seems fine , but honestly, I can't be sure what' s she really thinking - but you know what? doesn't matter to me, I'm the one who chose this guy to be my husband and it was the best decision of MY life (not hers).

Answer 10

life is to short if you feel that you love this man give it ago cause you will always regret it if you don t your parents will see in the long run that your happeniess is all that matters