Stay at home mom has question about ignorant mothers?

Question

Why is it that I go on message boards and working mothers bash stay at home mothers . I find it ironic that they would rather give more respect to a daycare worker then a mother that actually stays home and cares for her OWN child. Why is this?

I would never bash a working mother. I believe we are all mothers wanting the same thing for our children. I think trying to balance it all is pretty darn impressive. You don't know me. Thanks.

Answer 1

I wish I had an answer for that one. Many mothers like to stay at home and take care of their children. I don't know why people have a problem with that. If a mother chooses to stay at home with their children I say Good for them. It only shows how dedicated mothers are. Some moms choose to work and that is okay too. If I had a choice, I probabley would stay home, but raising two teenage boys on my own, I gotta work, I have no cloice, but that only makes me feel like I am a dedicated mom even when I was home when they were younger, I still felt dedicated to my kids. Don't let those people bother you. You do what you wish to do. My apologies to you for ignorant people who give you a hard time.

Answer 2

Back in the seventies and eighties, women were struggling to earn a good reputation for working while raising children. It was not considered respectable by the older generations. Before the sixties, most women stayed home with their children and that was considered the norm. Now, attitudes are changing. A lot of people think that stay-at-home moms use their homemaking title for nothing more than gossiping, watching daytime TV, letting their kids go wild, and free-spending money. While, some may do just that, there are many OTHER mothers who teach their children life-lessons every day and who love and nurture their children. These type of mothers should be honored not put down.

On the other hand, you have the working mother, who, more often than not, would give everything to be able to stay at home with her child, and can't afford to do so. Believe it or not, I have been in both positions, working during my first child, and not working with the second, so I know what I'm talking about.

Hey, life is hard sometimes folks. Harder on some than on others.

Speaking from both sides of the issue, I say it's best not to judge which path a mother takes. It is often for the best... and sometimes it's just from pure necessity.

Answer 3

Working moms seems to think that they are making a sacrifice for their family. They are away from their children so that they can provide a better life for their kids. I think some feel that stay at home moms have no skills, or education...which is usually not the case at all.
I am a working mom, but I would love the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom. I do get a little annoyed with some stay-at-home moms though. When you are home with your child all day every day, you shouldn't be sitting on your butt watching soaps. You should be taking advantage of that time and teaching your child. If you're not taking your child to a daycare/learning center, you still need to create that mind-enriching learning environment for them. If you don't, they will be way behind the kids that did go to day care. It's not fair to them with "No Child Left Behind" in the schools.

Answer 4

Some women feel its just as important that they get out and work, because it makes them the smart ones, the breadwinners. Personaly, I don't get it. I work full time and have 3 children (2 are my step kids). Currently I am expecting my 2nd child. My husband stays at home because he is permanently disabled. (Metal plate bolted to spine and hips). He is the stay at home daddy, for which I am very gratefull, since he makes sure things are kept somewhat clean at home, dinner is usually made, and when he doesn't do it, then I do it when I get home.
As much as I love my children, I have been working for so many years, and have to rely on myself alone for so long, that were I given the opportunity I'm not sure I would stay at home, I tend to actually feel more productive working. However, I have looked into daycares, and end up feeling bad that I could put my kids on someone else. I don't feel that guilt because of my husband, but then our situation is a little unique.
But your question is why would they give more respect to a day care worker...
Well, the reason for that may be that a day care worker tends to have more than one or two children to look after. Remember those are large groups of children.
Not saying I agree with this thinking, but I know I certainly would never work as a daycare working taking care of someone elses child, or several children, especially when I have 3 at home lol.

Answer 5

I believe for A FACT that any mother who works and leaves her baby in daycare feels guilty (I work a little bit from home and I feel guilty even being on the computer if my baby wants to play), most of my friends / relatives opted for the daycare "solution" and they all tell me they hate themselves a little for it but felt that was what they had to do... (some b/c they didn't really se stay-at-home as an option -- they had built a carreer and "everyone else does daycare...", others b/c they bought a huge house they cannot really afford, others b/c their kids are so out of control after years of daycare that they work to escape the kids and cannot imagine being wit them all day...)

So if someone is filled with such guilt and self-hate, then they are going to lash out at someone -- and it is rarely themselves...

Another point too though is that stay-at-home moms also bash the working moms and so I guess the working moms feel the need to defend the decision they live with every day...

Answer 6

Well, you just called working mothers ignorant. I work because I have to. If I could afford to stay home with my children, I would do it in a heartbeat! I have great respect (and a bit of jealousy) for stay at home moms. I have been on the message boards, though, and I do agree that most moms (on both sides) bash the other ones. The "stay-at-home mom" vs. the "working mom" is a very big argument. I think the moms who argue like this are just envious of the moms they are bashing.

Answer 7

I believe being a stay at home mother is the most difficult, important, and righteous position. Raising children is crucial in forming the basic characters for the child. It is mother who has this great task of making a child a successful, good and godly person, or the other wise a crook. Thus, to say the truth, mother is the one creating good or evil of the world, because all successful leaders, even the King, as well as the criminals of the world are produced or much influenced by how the mother nurtures the child. Also creating a home for the family, not just a house, but a home to bond the family to become one nucleus. Is also the most difficult task requiring her patience and long suffering. These are merely 2 amongst so many things a mother can do to form the world.

Answer 8

I was a working mom but now I am a stay at home mom. And working mom think that because they work as well as take care of the kids then their lives are harder. If in fact it is just the same we just have different things that stress us out. AND IT NOT COMPLAINING more as venting. Working moms come home and vent about their co workers and their boss or whatever why can't we talk about our jobs. And it is real work!!!! I do other things I don't just sit on the couch and watch television. I work out of my home doing independent work part time. And I do not want be called a COMPLAINERS or SELFISH or LAZY. I am far from that my husband and mother has to tell me to take a break for myself because I am constantly on the go. We are all mothers at the end of the day regardless of if we stay home or go to work. As long as our kids grow up great. I don't care about anything else

Answer 9

i'm sure alot of mothers who go out to work simply dont see any other choice if they want to live comfortably. what i dont understand with some working mums is why have a child when you work twelve hour days only seeing your child in the mornings and at bedtime. all the money in the world cannot replace time spent with your child.i chose to stay at home and look after my two, money is tight but it is the best decision i have ever made. i know that doesnt answer your question at all as i havent really noticed working mothers bash stay at home mums on the message board, but either way, whether you stay at home or go to work it will always be hard.

Answer 10

I am a working mom and I dont put down stay at home moms. Each person has to make the decision for there own. Personally I enjoy working and I would feel incomplete without excersing my social skills outside the home. I went to school and worked very hard for my position at work. I love my child and enjoy every minute I spend with him. But I dont think I would be as good of mother if I stayed home.
Some people dont get to make the decision either. They cant financially afford to stay home, like single parents - who would pay the bills?? I think we should all get along and respect the other person for their decision