If your boyfriend's family (including his 18-y/o daughter) doesn't like you, is the relationship doomed?

Answer 1

It depends greatly on if you are dating them as well as your boyfriend. If you have support from him then that's all you need to worry about. An 18y/o will naturally have resentment toward anyone taking her mother's place, but in time she and the family will come to understand that her father has a right to happiness and that you do not detract from the love he has for them.

Answer 2

The question for you is WHY don't they like you.

I'll take a guess: you're hot as hell and younger than him by a good stretch.

If that's the case, he would give a good god damn what his family thinks; except perhaps the daughter. That's where things get sticky. Then again, she's 18, not 12, and as long as you can be as nice as possible to her and otherwise tough it out, he may be inclined to tell her act her age and back-off. IF he's really into you.

If he's on the fence, he may decide to use the family's negativity to dump the relationship.

If however you are NOT "young and hot" and they dislike you for more meaningful reasons, well, that's something for YOU to think about, isn't it?

Answer 3

It is certainly challenging to be in a relationship when influential people in your boyfriend's life are against you.

I think a big factor in the equation is how your boyfriend handles criticism and rudeness from his family and daughter. Does he take their side or yours? If he doesn't stick up for you - then that's a good indication that you are in for a lot of heartache.

You have to weigh if the relationship is worth the struggle and the challenge. If this is a great guy who rocks your world - then it might not really matter what these people think. If he is a good guy that is nice to be with for now - maybe you need to move on to less turbulent waters.

Answer 4

Maybe! You just have to give it time and tell the father that you need him to step in and put his daughter in her place. If he allows her to have say in his relationship and cause drama just because she can't grow up then yes it will be doomed. That would be unfair for the both of you so if the two of you really want to make things work. You have to start by putting the daughter in check by sitting her own and talking to her. I'm sure once that has been done things will get better slowly and she will come around to accepting you being in her fathers life.

Answer 5

I don't know about doomed, but it sure will be stressful.
There are alot of factors to be considered to determine whether the relationship will outgrow the contempt from family members.
If there wasn't any drama that caused them to turn against you, such as an affair, or that you are "bad" for the boyfriend, then try to ride it out.

Answer 6

Good question..............it all depends on your boyfriend. His family not liking you is not the real issue, the issue is whether or not he sets them straight. You are not for them, you are for him. You know what I mean. This guy if he really wants to be with you will accept the fact that maybe his family doesn't like you and that's okay, because while they don't he does and he wants to make the relationship work.
As far as that goes, they don't have to like you, but you need them to respect you.
I am sort of in the same predicament, my bf mom hates my guts, but he has also told her that I am for him and not her, while her approval would be valued her disapproval, while she has expressed it is not warranted.

Answer 7

Like Avid said, if you want to pursue this, it won't be easy. You can't make his family nor his daughter disappear. They were in his life before you were. Sit him down and try to find out why they don't like you. See if you can find a way to change their minds. Don't try to make him choose between you and his family. NEVER WORKS!
Maybe you and he can try low-profile dating. Keep your relationship separate from his family. No rules stating you have to be involved with his family if you are not married.

Answer 8

Yes

Answer 9

no, as long as your boyfriend doesn't approve of their thinking or what they say or do ( if anything) then your relationship shouldn't be effected really, you don't have to go to family gatherings, you don't have to participate in any activities that you feel uncomfortable. I'm sure you can find something better to do than be around people who don't like you.

Answer 10

I think so.
You'll never win if he has to make a choice and if his family is vocal about their dislikes, then he'll eventually have to make that choice, because it may become too much of a headache to continually go to battle with them on your behalf.