My hubby thinks we need to see a doctor. Mainly for me, but also for him. He says I'm depressed 90% of the time. I admit that I do get depressed the week before my period, but I can't help it. It just happens and I can't shake it. We also have some issues with my family. I love my family very much, but there is always something bad going on with them. Always. My 14 yr. old brother is in prison. My 17 yr. old sister is pregnant AGAIN and is homeless. My 20 yr. old brother just got his crazy girlfriend pregnant and lives with her family. And my mother is a crazy ex drug head who will not take any responsibility for anything she does. Every time they call me I get extremely depressed. I know that no matter what I say or do it will not help. But I love them so much. It hurts me so bad to see them hurt; even though they will not do anything to help themselves. My husband does not know how to deal with them either. It hurts him to see me hurt over their stupidity. We have done all we can do to try to help them, and we have just given up. But it still hurts very very badly. They are my family.
2006-08-22 03:34:31 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
councillor
2006-08-22 03:43:46 · answer #1 · answered by fadil z 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think your husband is right.
Just because you have a reason (like a family that is extremely dysfunctional) does not mean you are not depressed.
Dealing with all of that can burn out anyone.
Going to a counselor will help you not only put your thoughts and actions into perspective, but will help you deal with your family when them call you.
Going to a counselor does not mean you are weak and cannot handle things on your own.
You are not going to be dependent on that person like your mother is/was on drugs.
They help you put things into perspective, and can give you some different coping mechanisms to use when the going gets rough.
Good for you for breaking the cycle.
2006-08-22 04:49:33 · answer #2 · answered by Freeadviceisworthwhatyoupayfor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't help people that won't help themselves. I know they're your family and you love them, but are THEY happy with their lives? If so then maybe there's nothing to be depressed about. If not and THEY won't get help or take advice then there's nothing for you to do.
Find joy with your hubby - it sounds like you're the lucky one who's doing okay. Don't blow it being sad about other people. Heck maybe they'll see YOU as their successful role model and follow suit.
Counselling couldn't hurt - either as a couple or you alone. It sounds like you have a lot of things on your plate and talking about them might let you off the hook for some of them. Also maybe hubby wants to go as a couple because he genuinely WANTS to help you with this and HE doesn't know what kind of advice to give to help you with it. (Guys are fixers they don't just want to listen, they want to solve.) If you actually (medically) depressed then there's ways of sorting that out too.
Good luck!
2006-08-22 03:51:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I go see a Marriage Counselor on a bi-weekly basis. It has helped our relationship soooooo much. Having an outsiders opinion actually makes your see what is making things so bad. But it only works if you can truly be open!
Good luck
2006-08-22 03:46:56 · answer #4 · answered by Beebopz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with 'lilmissinsanity' I think you have some co-dependancy issues going on. You're husband sounds like he's a good guy, I think he's right about seeking proffesional help.
You have to live you're own life, for you're sake and the sake of you're marriage.
2006-08-22 03:50:48 · answer #5 · answered by Chris M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I second the motion to get to Al Anon the sooner the better. You need to teach yourself that you aren't helping your family at all and that no one can help them but themselves.
2006-08-22 03:55:14 · answer #6 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go to an alanon meeting!!! asap
you're obviously co-dependent with some serious problems running rampant through your family and we can all relate regardless of race/age/gender. cuz crazy people are EVERYWHERE! yet we can get some counseling and learn to realize it has nothing to do with us and we are allowed to be happy people whether others want us to or not. :)
2006-08-22 03:42:15 · answer #7 · answered by lilmissinsanity 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ha a canceler you mean counselor! I say you should see a Psychologist or Counselor then if you need medication go to a Psychiatrist.
2006-08-22 05:03:43 · answer #8 · answered by Golden Ivy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you should visit a doc and take a really long vacation for abt two months and dont contact any of your family members while you re on vacation
2006-08-22 03:42:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes i would if i was you. But you do have a good husband please remember that. go see a counsellor together and maybe you'll come back with some answers. good luck
2006-08-22 03:43:55 · answer #10 · answered by jules 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the guy it,s motive force-is going to the psy-chiatrist? ordinary why say-,,not something gonna replace my international,, ,,motive force in hell it,s all precise. who's who? HELL diverse - Kristofer saint ////// my way -it,s ok///// Hells bells.............good success???
2016-11-30 23:59:37 · answer #11 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋