My mom and I have some big problems?

Question

I try and talk to her like mothers and daughters should but I feel like shes not listening.She yellls at me for the smallest things and get angry for nothing. She gives me the look down with my outfits and makes me feel very uncomfortable and upset. If I try to confront her she thinks I am lying and gets mad. That or she rolls her eyes and stops listening. She thinks what I have to say is stupid and I am just tired of her treating me awful. I am on the verge of running away cuz I'm sick of her crap. I dunno what to do. She doesn't listen, no one else confronts her, she would never go for therapy, and I am lost. Most of the time I am scared ot tell her stuff and I just don't feel comfortable talking to my own mother. I cry a lot and I am ready for a change....if you can help me please do!

Answer 1

Try talking to your school councelor or a teacher you really like. Is your grandmother around or an aunt around that you can talk to? try them.
You can also try writing down what you want to say to your mom and give her a letter. Use i sentences: "i feel im not being validated by you when i get yelled at for wanting to eat cerial for dinner"
Running away doesnt solve the problem, it makes it worse and besides if you ran away you would have to eat out of a dumpster and thats gross.

good luck.

Answer 2

Since the beginning of relationships Mothers and Daughters have rammed heads. Daughters want the mom to go away and Mom can't let go of the daughter. Compromise is the solution and mutual respect of one another. It is seldom an easy journey but the trip doesn;t have to be so miserable. Write your mother a letter, be candid and honest, tell her the things that she does that you like and appreciate and the things that you would like her to lighten up a little and or give you an option of choices instead of yelling and both of you not listening to the others point of view. Remember that your mother has lived longer than you and she is looking out for your well being, you need to respect her and accept what she is saying if it comes down to that being the only option. The rules and the conflict will ease up if you both work in a cooperative effort and love each other through this rough time, ain't easy but you'll be glad you did and your relationship will be the better for it! Good luck! V

Answer 3

I am so sorry to hear that you don't feel comfortable talking to your mom and that you feel judged by her. I myself was abused by my mother's boyfriend when I was 12 and after I told her, she married him. My mom and I have a very distant relationship. I know the pain of rejection by both parents, I didn't meet my father until I was 13. But I am here to tell you that you can rise above rejection, no matter the source. Running away might only make matters worse. Maybe you could try a little bit on your part to let your mom know that you're willing to work on the relationship too. Try leaving her a note that says I love you under her pillow, or her favorite candy bar. Try writing her a letter and tell her how hurt you are and judged you feel. If you feel that these efforts aren't working you could go to an aunt or a pastor or maybe a grandparent. When I was a teenager I felt very alone and I can see you are hurting. I will say a prayer for you and your mom. Hopefully she can see what a beautiful daughter she has and that you deserve to be listened too.

Answer 4

Is there a dad in your house? Or some other adult related to you that you can talk to, who might help you with your mother?
You don't say how old you are, and that can make a big difference. Believe it or not, Hollywood lies. All 12-14 year olds don't live like the Brady Bunch. There are a lot of tensions involved in growing up, and your mother might be having her own problems as well. You really need an intermediary to help you, and if you don't have a close relative nearby, talk to your school counsellor.
Get some help, and get it quick.
Good luck, girl.

Answer 5

You could tell her everything you just wrote right there. If she still doesn't seem to be listening to you, then you should find someone else to talk to that's sort of like a mother figure. Do you have an older sister, cousin, grandmother, or someone like that? Running away won't solve anything, cause she's still your mom whether you agree with what she does or not and she'd probably report you missing and the police would come looking for you.

Answer 6

I can really relate to this. I had a similar mother and she was abusive as well. Start with therapy for yourself since she won't go. I don't know what your age is, but running away is not the answer. If she is physically or emotionally abusive you can report her to your local human services through the State you live in (if your in the USA) or to your teacher or school counselor. But do visit the school counselior to start with. If that doesn't work, and perhaps it will work wonders for you, call the state welfare child welfare for more help with this and to get support from a caring social worker or counselor.
Don 't let her get away with it or ruin your life. running away will put you in great danger...you should be able to find other safe options throught he state.
I have been through a lot with my abusive parents and recovered after many years. One of things I did was to visualize what nice parents would be like and pretend I had them in a visualzation. It helped me to cope and learn how to relate to nice people...something you need to learn. Don't let others abuse you either after this. You need to win. You can do that by having a wonderful and happy life. You deserve it so go for it. It will make your mom look like the fool she is and you like the winner you are. Be a winner! (Also talk to your angels...if you beleive that way...they really do help...check out hayhouseradio.com and Doreen Virtue's show on there as well as the many other fine shows.)
All the best

Answer 7

I feel bad for you. If you have someone there to talk to like a relative or something ..talk to them if you do. See if you can get someone who is not gonna take sides to see if you all can sit down and try to work things out. I have a 20 yr old daughter who doesnt listen to me .. She thinks she knows everything and she doesnt ... I try to tell her i love her and I the things i tell her are for her own good.......... I listen to what she says and i try to explain things to her ...I have asked to help out around the house and with her little sister but she always comes up with some excuse. ..For example she wanted to use the car and I asked her to do something she didnt do it so i told her she couldnt have it ...she got mad at me and we ended up in a fight. You both have to give a little to get somewhere. Dont run away from the problems all it does is cause more problems in the end. Try to find someone who is not gonna take sides to use as a referee to see if you can work things out .. You both need to be open minded and try to see what happens.. I wish you both lots of luck

Answer 8

try talking to your school counceler or a teacher. sometimes parents see their children as just that. we forget they have feeling, or minds of their own. maybe your mom needs someone to listen to her. being a parent is never easy. keep in mind that most parents juggle jobs, kids, chores and a million other things. we get stressed out too.

as for running away, Don't Do It. many kids think life on the street is better than where they were. those kids get hooked on drugs, become hookers, and even end up dead.

i hope all works out for you.

Answer 9

You need to get the therapy. Some mothers and daughters have bad relationships. It happens. Getting therapy for yourself will help you to be able to cope better.

Answer 10

Sweetheart that is a full load you have there. I can't imagin what you should do. Perhaps tell her exactly how you are feeling about everything. Then ask her how she feels in return. Best to you on this little Princess.