I went out with my ex for about a year (we broke up after 6 months, then got back together 3 months later), things we're pretty good between us. He was my 1st pretty serious bf. Every said we were PERFECT for one another. Then we broke up for the final time, because things got boring and my friend got him mad at me. (don't ask). Then there's my current bf. He's great, but he's really shy. I'm supposedly his first gf, so all the issues w/ that are involved. I like him a lot, but I can't seem to get my ex, and my bff out of my mind. About my bff: he's always there for me, and I know he would do anything for me, however I'm not really his type. With my ex, it kinda seems like he still likes me and it kinda doesn't. I'm pretty sure I know what I'm going to do, but I want everyone's opinions. Please help.
2006-08-21 12:58:58 · 9 answers · asked by MakeBelieve. All you want. 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't know why all of you seem to think sex is involved with this, because it's not. I'm one of those people who think it's better to wait.
My current bf isn't a rebound guy. I waited two years after my ex to go out with my bf.
2006-08-21 13:15:46 · update #1
When someone says "who do I choose" I stop in my tracks. IF YOU dont know off the top of your head, then DONT choose. This is a clear sign that you are not ready, that you do not know and that really neither of them may be the right guy. Just take some time for you and when the time is right, it will all fall into place. When love is right you dont even have to think about where you want to be!
2006-08-21 13:05:20 · answer #1 · answered by my1215boo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, advice is just that. It is an opinion by other people.
The on again, off again relationship is just gonna tear you apart eventually.
The bff is a friend, and if he is not showing interest don't push it. More friendships have been ruined by trying to get into a relationship with a best friend, then going out with the super stud/super cheerleader type then anyting else.
As to your current boyfriend, did you get involved with him right after the break up? If so this is called a rebound. Not fair to him, or you. But if you want to let it work, find out what he likes, and see if you like the same things, or things close to it.
So there is my advice. I would suggest looking in yourself for the answers, and make sure you know what you want before going after it.
2006-08-21 13:08:34 · answer #2 · answered by ce1n 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The old saying is, you always think the grass is greener on the other side. You will find out though that your Ex is an Ex for a reason. Why backslide and wreck a good relationship for one that hasn't worked out twice before? But honestly, you are the only one who knows what you want, so go with your heart. But tell the new boyfriend before you do anything with the Ex, why hurt the Innocent person in this...
2006-08-21 13:16:55 · answer #3 · answered by Injun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best advice is to move on entirely. Your ex is your ex for a good reason - it never pays to go back, in my experience. Your current doesn't sound like a keeper to me - and if he is willing to have sex before marriage he is unlikely to want to be permanent with his first, right?
Move on, in the certainty that the new is always better than the old - always. With each relationship we refine our choices and get closer to the man that we can love and live with for a long, long time - someone you are proud to have on your team, someone who can help you (and you him) to accomplish a lifestyle and dreams that are compatible and stable.
Peace!
2006-08-21 13:08:47 · answer #4 · answered by carole 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first thing u need to do is think with your head. about your ex--you say that everyone though u guys were PERFECT for one another. but do you still believe that? do you still think that you guys are perfect for each other?? u say that u guys broke up because things got boring. okay, well why do u think that things will be "not so boring" now?? u need to really decide who it is that you will be happiest with. who is the most compromising person u can date?
the one factor all bfs and gfs should look for in someone is, the ability to compromise. if u cant compromise, u have nothing. of course, u need trust and love and all of that but if u cant compromise, u might as well say a big SAYONARA!
if u are NOT ur best friend's type, then that's that. you're not his type and u cant force him to look at you as his type.
just the fact that u're thinking or that u know that ur ex still likes u, makes it clear that u do NOT want to be with ur current boyfriend. if u started going out with him [ur current bf] a bit after u broke up with ur ex, then u're kinda just using him. u're carrying over the leftovers of ur relationship with ur ex, over to him. i know u dont wanna hurt him, but if it's just to ease ur heart of pain quickly, break up with him. it's not fair to him, and it's not fair to you.
of course, it's good to think with ur heart--it's iMPORTANT to think with ur heart. but use your head first.
think and then feel. and then think again.
good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!! =] =]
btw. i read in seventeen magazine that umm.. u should give yourself atleast one-third of the time u and ur ex went out, to move on. so since u guys went out really for 9 months, u should have given urself roughly 3 months time to move on and forget abt him and feel not so "regrettable".
2006-08-21 13:10:09 · answer #5 · answered by chetz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive been through the same thing. my ex came last halloween drunk sayin he still loved me after we broke up for 2 months. I left my current bf coz i still loved my ex and cudnt get him out of my head. I was with him until a few weeks ago that he dumped me coz he got bored and wants to b with other girls. It pisses me off coz he cuda left me wid the other guy who left me pregnant and i now have a baby and i cud of been with its dad.. its a long story! anyhow i hope u do the right thing and dont regret it! by the sound of it your young like me and id say dont commit yourself and make the most of ur childhood! instead of haveing relationships that will probly not last!gd luck
2006-08-21 13:09:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
quit spreading yourself too thin. You are worrying about too many guys. Lay off for a while and get a pregnancy test. You'll be on Springer in no time.
2006-08-21 13:06:07 · answer #7 · answered by Matt Beezy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would choose neither. Let us know what you decide since you seem quite certain of what you are going to do.
2006-08-21 13:05:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
go with your heart, only you know the answer
2006-08-21 13:04:01 · answer #9 · answered by sarah c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋