I think i'm a lesbian what do i do?

Question

I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 yrs and i'm very happy with him, its like we are best friends. i love him and he loves me. but before i met him i use to date girls and guys and i thought i was Bi but now all i can think of is females and how i wanna be with a female and i've cheated on my boyfriend with 3 females, and i told him about one he was a little madd but he's cool now. all i wanna do is to be with a female, i go to myspace and other places looking for girls to get with, i dont know what to do i love him and i wanna have him near me all the time, but i really want a relationship with a female what do i do ?

Answer 1

Maybe try being just friends with the boyfriend. A possible option is to start actively dating females.

Answer 2

Have you actually talked with your boyfriend about your desires? What kind of relationship do the two of you have-is it one where you can be honest or do you go throught the motions pretending to be what he wants you to be? Four years is a long time to be with one person, especially when you are young(and I think you are), and people change aver the course of time. Could it be that the two of you have grown apart as well as your pending attraction for women is surfacing? If there is such a deep part of yourself that yearns for something, don't you think that you should nurture that part of yourself? I know I am asking a lot of questions but I think you need to ask yourself exactly what it is that you really want, and then pursue it. Women are beautiful, and I can understand. Now you need to talk to your boyfriend about it and if you can't, you probably need to move on. The only other alternative is to do something that will shake your relationship to the point of change. I hope that this helped. :-)

Answer 3

Wow, you do have a dilemma...I would guess you need to take some time for yourself and go away. What I suggest while your alone is to write down on a piece of paper what your attractions are to the female gender and then do the same for the male gender, then compare.
Can a man do the same things for you a woman can?
Can a woman do the same things a man can?

The truth is YES to both! So you just need to be honest with yourself and find what the hang up is.

Answer 4

tell me, are you in love with him or do you love him to bits? the thing is after your with someone for so long you grow a historical love and that is a strong bond, only you know what kind of love you have for him so think about that. When you think about females is it purely a sexual thing? Do you enjoy sex with a man still? you may still just be bi, just missing the strange you havent had in a while. If you love him -and this is hard- dont be selfish, if you want something else open up and tell him.

Answer 5

Men and women are driven by forces we are only now comprehending. It is very complicated, in the case that
there are masculine women, and feminine men.
Masculine individuals tend to make themselves feel bigger than they are to compensate for basic human insecurity. While
feminine individuals unfortunately make themslves feel smaller
than they are. Thus you have a conflict. In the words of one outspoken lesbian. When she was with a man, she felt like she was with an alien.
But most relationships that last seem to be composed of a
masculine and feminine individual anyway. I think most of the gay,
lesbian thing is psychological. Because the fact is we are all
complcated individuals, and even when we get with our own, we still have to deal with personality conflict.
Psychological, but by that I mean how we deal with these spiritual things. Our decisions. Because men and women both
are trying to balance these masculine and feminine forces
within. But they err when they do it externally. Dressing up,
acting out, and through sex.
As I said, very complicated.

Answer 6

well you really shouldn't have an exclusive boyfriend for one but if you insist I would recommend discussing this with him it isn't fair to hide it from him. Who knows he may dig you wanting to be with females it might even work into your relationship if not then you need to choose. The main point is tell him your true feelings and it will go a long ways if he cares about you he will let you go.

Answer 7

Have 3-somes

Answer 8

You're not being fair to your boyfriend. It seems like you're afraid to be alone and that's why you're still with him. That's not fair. If you truely are a lesbian that's fine. But you need to tell your boyfriend and end the relationship. You can stay friends if he's ok with that, but it's not fair to him if you cheat on him. It would hurt him a lot more if he found out that you're cheating on him than if you tell him that you're a lesbian.

Answer 9

I think you should experiment. Maybe you are bi. I mean, if your boyfriend is okay with it, you should experiment with more girls. And think over your situation. Do you love your boyfriend, really truly? If yes, then you'll have to choose whether you want to be with a guy or girl.

Answer 10

hey girl...
well i think that u dont love ur bf as lover!! u need him next to u coz he's like ur bestfreind and u feel comfortable with him coz u've been together 4 years! u get used to him and u think that u r in love with him coz maybe ur afraid of loosing him if u left him...
anyway i suggest that u tell him the truth so u dont hurt him anymore and tell him that u really like to stay like bestfreind coz u trust him and nee him next to u and if he is open minded so i think like this u wont loose him and u can be with a girl and live happy :)
good luck girl