does a child effect a relationship?

Question

if one partner has a child with an ex but they arnt involved in their childs upbringing, can it still effect future relationships?

im not the one with the kid btw!

just to add yeah its not out of his choice he has no contact, its the witch of a mother.

Answer 1

Depends on how mature you are in managing your own security in that scenario.
All up to you to face your own demons and justify them one by one.

It may or may not trouble you and affect your relation but once you'll have your own bloodline,that child which doesn't belong to you will always be considered an outsider,welcomed of course, but not totally yours to begin with.Hard fact and that's just how it is.Just remain fair in most if not all circumstances when problem arises.

Answer 2

It depends upon what you mean by effect? You should be aware when entering into such a relationship with a partner who has a child that that child will always come first. But that would be no different than the couple having a child of their own. The child will always come first. Secondly, the child's father may not be initially involved, but their is the strong possibility that he/she could be at any time, which means their ex will always be part of their life's in some way, shape or form. If you can accept this without exception, then a child from a previous relationship would have no adverse effect on a relationship with that parent. If you are in doubt, I would recommend staying away, because it isn't just your feelings and the parents at stake, but the child's as well who is an innocent bystander. Hope this helps.

Answer 3

i don't think there is going to be a "right" or "wrong" answer to this...but just someones personal preference.

Me personally, I would never get involved with someone with a kid...that is only because I don't want "used" goods if u know what i mean....now many will say that is wrong, or mean...but think about it, when someone goes to buy a "new" car, do you want the one on the show room floor that has less than a mile and that is just driving it into the building...or do u want the one in the parking lot with 100 miles on it from where people have test driven it! My point is, I don't want a woman that has been test driven ^_^

Now on the flip side, if someone has a child, but has nothing to do with it....I would personally look @ that person as a dead beat parent not wanting to take responsibility! In that case, I would just not tell the other person if u won't be contacting your child or the child contacting u.

Answer 4

Of coarse there will be an impact on future relationships but that doesn't mean it's a negative impact.

At some point the child will want to see the father and this is some thing you need to accept.

All children deserve the right to get to know both parents and if your b/f really wants access all he has to do is go to court and no judge in this country would deny the child the right to both parents.

Answer 5

Wow some of these answers are discouraging, let me tell you from experience and a person in the situation right now. First it depends on the kind of person youre dealing with if he's not open-minded then its a problem because he may not want to take care of another mans child but if you have someone who is open-minded and humble chooses to accept the total package then its not a problem. I have a child from a previous relationship and got involved with someone else, and i was very picky about who allowed in my childs life and me and this guy hit it off. he accepted my child and treated him excellent and loves him probably more than he loves me and my son still visits with his father and talks with him. me and this guy will be married soon. so my son didnt affect anything. its not the child its the man. so if hes a real man then theres no issue. Good luck & God Bless!

Answer 6

100% Yes! And I am the one with the kid.

There are so many things for both people to think about. At the end of the day my son comes first, however I dont want to push my boyfriend away. I am very fortunate to have a caring bf, he is seeing me and not my son but he makes every effort to ensure that he is included in what we do.

I am fortunate where my sons father is not too involved but his parents are. My bf has to go home when my son is dropped off by them just to save an awkward situation, however this will have to change if we are ever going to live together.

There is so much to think of, your own emotions, his emotions and the childs emotions... and also financial implications too.

Hope this helps.

Answer 7

in case you could not turn to kinfolk for help, and friends are not an selection, All i am going to point is a touch one sitter. They value money, yet in case you check out, i'm particular you'll come across a sensible one. For the destiny, is the courting along with your mom salvageable? Your daughter has 2 instruments of grandparents so it may be tremendous if she would have a courting with a minimum of one in each of them. also attempt growing a member of a mom and infant team or something to make friends, and make you really a lot less remoted. it may also grant you with women interior a similar boat, and bring about a pair large friendships, which could actually help ease the load of being a knackered figure, as there'll be somebody else to teach to. little while period, if the babysitter selection is out, are you able to compromise your daughter down early one nighttime, or occupy her including her toys and a dvd in her room? per chance then you truthfully could set up a romantic nighttime along with your better half? it can be extra accessible on an nighttime the position you're a lot less drained!

Answer 8

yes, of course! A child will always affect a relationship. Is this man not involved with his child's upbringing by choice? is he not paying child support? these are important things to know...

Answer 9

Yes this affects the child in many many ways. Especially if the child is being used as a pawn between the parents. I feel bad for this kid, but it's a sad fact that alot of parents use their kids in this way, and it's always the child that pays the highest price for it. :(

Answer 10

yes yes and yes.
a child will always bring a new aspect to the relationship. why is the one parent not involved with their child? that is question number one. do you want to be with someone who has nothing to do with their children? if they can just up and leave their own flesh and blood, do you think they will think twice about leaving you? and if it's not their choice not to be involved, that parent will always....well, lose a child and see how you feel you will have to be really strong for that person you are with. dont get upset when they one day just lash out...its just pent up hositility.