I'm pretty gay, any idea how I can be straight?

Question

I'm pretty sure that I tried everything when I was little to not be gay. I didn't want to be gay growing up. Turned to church, etc. I finally found peace in life coming out and accepting who I am. I keep hearing Christians saying to let go of the sin and change our ways blah blah blah. I would freaking love to. LIfe would be so much simpler if I was straight because I wouldn't have to deal (as much)with ignorant folks who think their beliefs are the only correct ones and everyone else goes to hell. Honestly how would you suggest I go about becoming straight because I am pretty sure I tried that for about 19 years. Secondly, if asked, could YOU sleep with the same gender? (since you are asking me to sleep with a gender I am not attracted to) ALL RELIGIOUS VIEWS ASIDE... I didn't try to be gay so I am pretty sure there should be a simple answer if "going straight" is my choice. When you answer, please ask yourself, WWJD?

By practical, I mean that praying for god to make me straight is not going to work... tried that for years. If god can "fix me", does that mean that god messed me up? I don't ever remember choosing to be gay.

I am very happy being gay, just saying religious folks keep acting like I can flip a switch to be straight... just asking them for advice how.

Answer 1

Don't worry about what religious biggots think about your sexual preference. I know this is easier said than done but you have to remember that they simply don't understand. They merely use their Bibles to hide behind to back up their closed-minded ideals. They themselves don't follow all of its teachings. It says "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." and that no sin is greater than any other and not to judge lest yee judged. When they tell you that you are going to hell, remember those 3 things. They are surely not without sin because NO ONE is perfect.

I know it's hard to not let these things bother you, but try. Just because some people may think you are going to "Hell" doesn't mean you are. Just because they believe it is wrong doesn't mean it is. They are doing wrong by saying those things to you. They are doing wrong by judging and ridiculing you. You should never change who you are because other people don't agree with it. Remember this "Be yourself. Those who matter don't mind. Those who mind don't matter."

Answer 2

Let me start by saying that God don't make mistakes,I know how you feel I have a friend that's also going through the same thing.He said do you think I like to be this way,he said I would love to have children one day and be married.It's also in the bible that you should'nt sleep with the same sex I can't remember the verse but I have read it myself.Now I also know that man has wrote most of the bible and change things around.Everyone is the way they are for whatever reason.My daughter is 10 years old and 5ft5 and 103 pds.The kids at school call her bones and so on.She asked me mom why am I so skinny,and I told her because God needs you to breeze through this journey called life,I told her if you were big you would'nt be able to do this,she said why am I so tall,I told her so you can reach out to others in need.Like I told my daughter you just haf to find your purpose,don't turn away from God now.Sometimes he test our faith to see how long you will hold on.Are you going through the son or praying straight to God because you know you haf to go through the son in order to go to the father?Faith it's all about faith.Stop trying so hard to be something you know you can't change by yourself,and try asking God to help you to be who he needs you to be that's the key thing here.He hears you,I know you don't think so,but he created us he already knows us.Goodluck to you,try not to let what people say to you get you down,they can't and won't be the one who will have the final say so when it's all said and done!

Answer 3

Find a girl with manish qualities that you would like to bang, and go for it. LOL
Just kidding, ignore those people. Let me ask you a question. Do you have one or more brothers that were born in a row before you? Scientific research has found a link between multiple older male siblings and the resulting homosexuality of the 3rd son or 4th son born in a row. Here's the reason : when a woman is pregnant the fetus is viewed as a foreign body by her immune system, more so with male fetuses. In the event that two or more male fetuses gestate in a row, it increases their mother's resistance to their conflicting male hormones, until there is a reaction that starts to take place in the mother's chemistry to make the fetus fit better with the mother's body.......more female genes are introduced to alter the fetus chemically, making a naturally gay male baby. I haven't heard of an explanation for lesbians other than choice. But that info. was from a news story on my Yahoo, and I'm sure you could find it if you looked.

Answer 4

Being religious doesn't help. You need to really know Jesus, who is a Person, not just a religion.

Spend time with Him: read His Word in the Bible, talk to Him as a friend through prayer, and tell others what Jesus means to you. By that way, your love for God is going to grow by His grace, and you'll become more like Christ with His help.

Do you really want to be straight? Am asking you because the decision to change needs to be done by you. You decide to be straight, and God gives you the strength to do it. He's not going to make the decision for you. If you really want to be straight, ask Him believing that He can do a miracle, and He'll do it. Maybe, it's not gong to be easy. It might take some time. But if God has changed so many people, including gays, be sure He can do it for you too!

Ask Him to teach you how to love Him, and give you the strength to keep straight. The clue is loving Jesus with all your heart.

Just ask Him with all your heart, but believing that He'll do something for you. He loves you so much and is willing to make a miracle on you. Just ask Him to come into your heart and change you.

I highly recommend these videos: http://www.amazingfacts.org/items/study_guides.asp?tTitle=New%20Revelation

God bless you, my friend!

Answer 5

At that age, he will be curious yet that would not make him gay. He would observe that you're a touch effeminate and would not favor to damage you. in case you want his friendship, do not take it extra. do not attempt to the contact him in detail because the subsequent day, he will be so embarrassed that you received't see him back. you've made it sparkling to him the way you're. enable him come to you at present if this is what he needs. in the different case purely be like a chum to him.

Answer 6

The first thing I would like to clarify in my answer is that to be "gay" isn't a personality trait, or a certain life style, it's simply the act of having sex with someone of the same gender. The definition could be made broader, to the act of fantisizing about having sex with the same gender.

As far as actually having sex, most people would agrea that with proper will power you can choose not have sex. If you belive this is beyond your power, then you have an addiction, regardless of whether you thing having sex with someone of the same gender is wrong, if you can't say no to it then you have an addiction and you'll most likely need the support of others to break this addiction.

If you can choose not to have sex with someone of the same gender, that's at least a start, but the desire is probably still there. This is a place you and I can find common ground.

Although in general I'm attracked to the same gender I am attracked to the opposite gender. As a Christian I belive it is wrong from me to think about women other then my wife in sexual way. However growing up leanered very bad habits.

So when I see a pretty girl walking down the street I think about things I shouldn't. I asume when you see a Hot guy walking down the street you do the same, the more you think about it the more you want to have sex with someone of the same gender.

So the trick is to avoid thinking about, the way I do that ( not always very succesfully) is when I catch myself thinking about things I don't want to think about, I in effect change the subject in my mind, usually for me I start thinking about work. Find something that you're interested in that you like to think about, use that as your new subject

So when you start to think something sexual, discard it and start thinking about your "new" topic. Make a practice of this and in time you will find youself not thinking about sexual things as much.

Another trick, is not exposing your self to images that tend to make you think this way. For me this means, walking out of the room wehn a victoria Secret add comes on, or fast dforwarding through the sex scense in a movie.

I'm not saying it will be easy but it is possible and I do truly belive in the long run it will be better for you. Just like it's better for me, to only think of my wife in a sexual way.

Answer 7

You're gay. I think the important thing is how YOU feel you should live your life. If you feel it's a sin, and love makes you feel guilty, then I guess you have to live your life that way. Just understand that there are many people who do not think it's a sin - who believe that God made you as you are and that love is always a blessing. I don't know what Jesus would do. If the stories are correct and he was a celibate, I think you have to at least consider the idea that he had homosexual tendancies and chose not to act on them.

Good luck to you. I hope you can find a way to be true to both your faith and to yourself. Blessings! )O(

Answer 8

I believe that no one is born gay. This is important, because if homosexuality is not genetic, then it is an acquired behavior. I am not simply saying that you chose to be gay. I certainly feel that homosexuality can be caused as a result of one's environment in formative years. This is backed up by social science. For instance, the alarmingly high correlation between homosexualty and child abuse(both sexual and other).

Since homosexuality is an acquired behavior, it can be changed. This may not be an easy process. Just like Pavlov trained dogs to salivate upon hearing a bell, humans who have the impulse toward homosexuality can train themselves to lose that impulse.

Changing one's inherent instinct is no light matter. This would start with a weighty decision. In all liklihood, there would have to be some underlying reason to desire such an extreme change. This underlying reason would likely have to be compelling to the person. I notice that you've posted your question in the religion section of this site. Choosing God would be a compelling reason.

Once one has decided to change, he would have to set out to condition/discipline himself just like Pavlov conditioned his dogs. The person would have to create positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement, and avoid all reinforcement contrary to his goal.

I admit this is not a feel-good answer. But if one set out to do this, this is what it would take to change one's instinct.

Answer 9

This is as practical as I can get.

All humans are born with fleshly weaknessess, yours happens to be desire for the same sex (gender). By understanding first off, that you are no different than the rest of the population would be the first thing to accept.

Now, what does anyone do to deny fleshly desires that try to control us? If we have a weakness for alcohol (excessive) we certainly stay away from bars, drinking parties etc.
If we have a weakness for the same sex or the opposite sex (homosexuality or adultry, fornication) we stay away from situations where we would be tempted to actually commit these acts.

All judgemental views aside, you will need to find something in your life that will replace these feelings that you have. An alcolholic still wants to drink, an adulterer still wants to sleep around.

God never said following his way would be easy, in fact he said it would be the path of most resistance. All temptation must be resisted. I am sure that your desire of the same sex is not your only fleshly sin as I know I have more than one weakess to resist.

With all this in mind, try to read and reread your bible, listen to no man without comparing his teachings with the bible, and if they differ, stick with the bible. Only god can open your eyes and heart to what is right, and only you can accept it once you are aware of it in your heart.

The attraction to our sin may never go away completely, but the lust and burning desire will, with Gods help and guidance.

Answer 10

I am glad you asked! You are right, we can not change ourselves. Only God can change our spirit. Being Gay really does not define who you are. It is only a desire or choice of your body. People are made up of Body, Soul, and Spirit. The only way to change your desire, is to change your spirit. This is accomplished by becoming "Born Again". God removes our old spirit and replaces it with Himself, the Holy Spirit. That is why the Bible says that we are new creatures in Christ Jesus. I suggest that you receive Jesus as your Lord and Savior and then you will automatically change. If you already have, receive ye the Holy Ghost. When I did this, my life and my desires changed! Many Christians when they have been "Born Again" go back to their old ways because they did not realize that God delivered them when they became "Born Again." They hang out their old friends and believe that they can not change. If they go back to their old ways, it is much harder, but not impossible. Please read Dennis Jernigen's Testimony. I hope that this helps you. If you have any more questions, please e-mail me.

Sincerely Yours, Pastor Jeff Ludin, A Friend Of God