Is having a baby sleep in the same bed as the parent considered child endangerment or against the law in CA?

Question

I am going to use a bassinet for the baby to sleep in until it is about 3-4 months old. My mother and sister disagree about not moving the baby to a crib after that. I and the father of the baby want to have the baby sleep in the bed with me until it moves to it's own bed when it gets older. My mother and sister are being to controlling over the issue and are threatening to call child protective services if I refuse to use the crib later. Do they really have the right to do that? Is it against the law or considered child endangerment if the baby sleeps in an adult bed with the parent if there is no threat to them? I don't smoke, drink, or use drugs and I think the baby will be safer in the bed with me rather than in a crib in case there is ever an emergency?

Answer 1

Co-sleeping isn't against the law anywhere in the USA as far as I know.

You might contact Attachment Parenting International or La Leche League for some information on cosleeping benefits and safe cosleeping to share with your family.

EDITED TO ADD:
As long as you follow safe cosleeping guidelines, a child is SAFER in bed with you than in a crib and the chances of SIDS are LOWER when a baby is sleeping next to mom.

FOR THOSE WHO FEAR ROLLING OVER ON BABY -
Unless you are on drugs or drunk that isn't likely to happen. When is the last time you fell out of bed? You don't! Because even when you are asleep you have a sense of where the edge of the bed is. Sleeping with your baby is the same way.....especially for a breastfeeding mom who is very in tune with her baby.

Answer 2

Its not against the law or endangerment. However, its not the safest sleeping arrangement, the crib is better. You could accidentally roll over on the child at night in your bed. But you are setting yourself up for problems later. Been there done that. You will have a heck of time getting your child out of your bed later.
BTW, please stop refering to your child as it, sounds like you are carrying an object instead of a person.

Answer 3

I want to start off by saying that as far as I know it's not illegal anywhere, HOWEVER.... I do want to point out a few downsides to having a "family bed", just in case you haven't thought this through all the way. First off, as anyone who has children knows, one small child can take up the entirety of a king sized bed... I'm not joking, you won't have any personal space or cuddling space for the next 1 1/2 to 2 years. Secondly, if you and your partner want to make love again within the next 2 years, I recommend you put the kid in his/her own bed. Third, once you get a child used to sleeping in the bed with you, it's hard to transition him/her to his/her own bed and you will have many, many nights of crying and tantrums until they adjust. But, I also have to say that it is YOUR child, and YOUR decision, your family needs to butt out. If you are willing to deal with the down sides of having a family bed, then that's your business and no one else's.

Answer 4

Co-sleeping is not against the law in California or any other state at this time.

Unfortunately, it is true that infant deaths have occurred from smothering, either by a parent or in the blankets. I don't care how "in tune" you are with your baby, sheer exhaustion does take over and you're not as aware of things you should be. I spent seven years in emergency medicine (over 16 years total in medicine) and responded to 32 emergency medicine calls involving co-sleeping; 28 being DOA. You don't forget those sorts of things.

I have a two month old and I have him in the room next to ours, doors open, in a crib. Either myself or my husband check on him on a regular basis. There are times when we do cuddle with him in our bed but as soon as I feel drowsy, back to his own bed he goes.

It's all a matter of personal choice but I would definitely do some research before making a final decisions either way. For me, I'm just more comfortable with him being in his own bed.

Answer 5

First off, CPS can be called on you any time, for any reason, whether the danger to the child is real or imagined. Anyone has the right to call CPS on you (and because of confidentiality rules, you will never know who called, unless they admit it to you personally). However, they are unlikely to do anything if all they find is that your child is sleeping in bed with you.

Now to answer your question: It's not against the law. Where the child sleeps is really the choice of the parent. My 22-month old still sleeps with me on occasion. Sometimes she'll just fall asleep in my bed while we're watching TV. Sometimes I'll move her back to her bed, sometimes I'll just let her stay asleep. Other times she'll go to sleep in her own bed, but crawl into mine in the middle of the night. So if you want your infant to sleep in bed with you, then that's your personal choice.

One thing to remember, though, is that the longer your child sleeps in bed with you, the harder it will be to get him into his own bed later. My girlfriend is having that problem now, her two year old won't stay in his own bed because he spent his first two years sleeping with her. So you need to understand that you may be creating your child's dependence on you to go to sleep, which will make it harder for him to go sleep on his own later.

However, you also need to understand that if something were to happen to the child, you would likely be held liable for any injury (i.e. child falls out of bed, or you accidentally strike the child in your sleep). Then you could possibly be charged with child endangerment if the child is injured because of sleeping in bed with you (and CPS would likely intervene at that point). And if you accidentally smother the child to death, then you could possibly be charged with murder as well.

In the end, the final decision is your own. If you feel more comfortable with the child in bed with you, then you should go ahead and let him sleep with you. However, you should take every precaution necessary. This includes:

1. Get rid of any large comforters that could smother the child and replace them with something lighter and thinner.
2. Get thinner, non-down pillows so they won't collapse around the child when his head is in the middle.
3. Install a rail or guard on the side of the bed the child will sleep on.
4. Make sure you have pillows or something soft on the floor as well, so if the child does fall out, he will have a soft landing.

Good luck, and remember that you're the parent, not your mom or sister, and you need to do what's best for you.

Answer 6

I allow my 4 month old daughter to sleep with me and my husband after her 6am feeding, she usually sleeps with us until 9 am but i have her sleep in her play pen beside our bed as her bassinet is too small and she isn't quite ready for her crib. Allowing the baby to sleep with you and your husband can put the baby at risk for SIDS ( sudden infant death syndrome) especially if you or you husband are smokers, deep sleepers or if you use drugs or sedating medication (you can roll onto baby). Never place the baby on a pillow or use fluffy blankets or quilts (again for suffication purposes). Also make sure not to overheat the baby.

Answer 7

NOPE, not against the law. Are they crazy? But you need to be extra careful with a newborn in the big bed, no cushion mattress, no pillows, no thick blankets, be careful of your blankets/comforters, etc. The biggest threat to the new born in your bed is suffocation. Also, it's harder to wean them off your bed later. As a compromise, you can have the crib next to your bed. They even have the kind that you can remove one side, so it becomes level to your bed.

Answer 8

i don't think that it is aginst the law, but it can be risky. just in case buy a cute bassinette and put it right next to your bed and you'll never know the diffrence. speaking from experinece i had both my children sleep in my bed since birth and now im having my third child and i don't know if my son will stay in his own bed now, that the new baby is comming but i try sometimes. buy a crib and a bassinett and have the best of both worlds, you can have ur baby close by and when people come over you can have the crib to put the baby in, when he/ she gets to big for the bassinette. i did and it worked out just fine, your body will thank you. besides when u getin busy later on you don't want your baby laughing in his sleep cause he think someone is bouncing him up and down on their lap, like i did ha ha ha ha ha , go for both you won't regret it and to shut your nosy family up, they are just jealouse they don't have the opportunity to be in your shoes right now shopping for baby furniture and stuff it gets contaigous u know good luck and dont worry.

Answer 9

Absolutely not, its not child endangerment my daughter slept in my bed from the time she was born until she was two. #1 you won't roll over on the baby, #2 its easier to breastfeed (whether you want to or not) 33 it makes the parents feel closer to the baby. Oh and tell your sister and your mother to back off it YOUR child and if they call child services tell them never to talk to you again. If they aren't going to respect your child rearing abilities then they are just going to make your life harder.

Answer 10

I dont think there is a law against it, but just remember once you start this it could be very hard to break the habit of the child sleeping in your bed.