I hope I write this in a way that the prudish American censors at Yahoo in Calif. can accept. Please, NO MORALIZING OR VULGAR ANSWERS.
I'm 15. I live in a country where age of consent is 14 (12 if partner is 14 or less) and also where it is legal to charge a guy for your body. I've messed around with a couple of boyfriends but never had any real sex yet and I don't think they have either . I think it's time for me but I don't want it to hurt. I also want to last a long time and get a really good O and also be respected for my desire afterwards but I don't want any commitment where a guy is hung up on me, I'm too young. Should I get deflowered by one of my inexperienced bfs who are too horney or should I find an older very experienced man who can understand me, maybe a married guy? If a much older guy should I try to charge him? If your F and had relevant personal experience don't be shy to tell me.
2006-08-21 06:29:19 · 24 answers · asked by Marie L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I've confided to 5 of my girlfriends. Two are virgin still 3 aren't. 3 say go for an older guy and 2 for a guy my age. My mom says to wait but when I'm a couple of years older I should find an older experienced guy.
2006-08-21 06:31:57 · update #1
So basically you just want to lose your virginity and you don't care who it's with right? For your first time, if you don't care about anyone in particular, then it's not going to matter whether you're with an older guy or a younger "less experienced" guy. It's going to hurt regardless. And if you think you will have an orgasm on your first time, think again. There will be too many other things going on with your body for you to be even thinking about having an orgasm. I agree with your mom. You should wait until you're at least in a relationship with someone you really care about. It will mean more and you will enjoy the experience more. But I'm not going to lecture you. Whatever you end up doing...be safe. Use protection...you AND him. Take that idea of "charging for sex" out of your head. You're not a hooker but that will be your label the second you accept money for sex. Respect you body and others will too. Good luck!
2006-08-21 06:41:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok... putting aside any sort of sentiments relating to .... waiting... for the right person....
Find an "older" guy. I dont mean someone in their 20's or something. You will remember your first time for the rest of your life, so you dont want to feel dirty about it later...and if you go out with an older guy...you likely will (i've heard it from another of my female friends). Instead find someone that has had sex a few times...someone that you are definitely attacted to..and have fun. Make sure he knows you are a virgin and will be nice enough to go slow. If i were you... I would have sex with him a few times... I've heard its not just the first time that can be difficult for girls (some "hurt" for a few times). Give it a shot and stick with him for a few weeks.
Good Luck from a non prudish american.
2006-08-21 17:20:49 · answer #2 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem with an older more experienced guy is that he may have diseases. In fact it's likely. I see your point about younger guys too though. Basically I think you should wait, but if you're unwilling to wait then I'd choose someone who was a virgin. Let him do the deed with his hand first then he won't go so quickly. Honestly you should wait though. There are SOOOOOO many things that can go wrong. Also you probably need to realize that it is most likely that it's GOING to hurt. It probably wouldn't be as painful if you're older. Use protection whenever you do it.
2006-08-21 13:39:26 · answer #3 · answered by radnimar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know that you are ready when you are ready. Lots of times you'll hear about how people regret their first partner that they slept with, or that they waited for the person they are with now (their fiance or husband). It hurts the first time. I felt more comfortable loosing my virginity with an experienced guy, who is my age, casue he knew that it was going to hurt, he was respectful and caring towards me. I found someone that I wanted to grow with and he's someone I loved, so it probably would have hurt more if I was more nervous about what a random guy might want to do with me. Its going to hurt your first couple of times at least, so if you want, get really drunk and just find a one night stand to get the hard part out of the way, that way when you have sex with men, clearly you want to do ti for money, he'll get more pleasure out of it, knowing that you are having a good time as well I would think. Hope that helped some. Just be safe, whatever you choose
2006-08-21 13:41:07 · answer #4 · answered by Hannah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have but one time to do this. 15 is very young and in my opinioni it should be for love. You don't want to look at your first time as a business transaction.
SO much in our life is whittled down to the "bottom line" and I guess that's why we have a heartless society.
Selling your body devalues your self-esteem. Yes it can make you a few pennies richer, live life a little bit easer but the ultimate cost is so great you really should think about it.
They call it "making love" and it's what separates us from the animals. Selling it .....well...where will that put you?
Save your money, come to America and live the Amreican dream.
Good luck
2006-08-21 13:40:49 · answer #5 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just wait. What is the hurry. Save your body and soul for the person that is deserving of you. Experience does not matter when you choose the right person. Get a good education and try to travel before you decide to get into a serious relationship. There is no rule that says that you have to have sex now or ever for that matter.. Good luck to you.
Gary
2006-08-21 13:36:55 · answer #6 · answered by gary t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are rushing things. Why not make it something special with someone you love? Also, you are putting alot of expectations on it to have it be great the first time. It's not usually like that from what I have heard from everybody and from what I experienced my first time. There are other ways to have an O. I'm sure your horny boyfriend would be happy to practice until he got it right!
Relax! And protect yourself. Please don't go with a married guy. That's not very nice to his wife. I don't care if you think that's moralizing. I can't keep that opinion to myself.
2006-08-21 13:44:18 · answer #7 · answered by starspangledgirl77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will ALWAYS remember your first time. Don't have sex for the first time as a prostitute, that could seriously traumatize you. If you really MUST do it now (and I think you are too young), do it w/ one of your BF's. The first time ever is very often awkward and a learning experience for both parties. Also, use lube if you don't want it to hurt, spit works well as lubrication also..
Be careful, don't get pregnant or a disease
2006-08-21 13:37:13 · answer #8 · answered by akristel2003 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well definitely not a married man, that wont help anything.
Most may say to go with mother's advice and maybe that might be the thing to do, but if you think you are really ready to do such a thing, then maybe you should go for one that you are sure wont want a relationship. But just to be sure, make sure they know whats up and what status your under right now.
Good Luck!
2006-08-21 13:47:34 · answer #9 · answered by 2cute4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with the older guy. If it is the right guy, he will treat you proper and can make it almost if not entirely pain free. Your young boyfriends will not have an easy time of it, guaranteed.
and do not charge for your body, have some self respect.
2006-08-21 13:37:04 · answer #10 · answered by barter256 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋