It's been a week since he broke up with me. I got this info from one of our communal friends Tom. Just like Tom said, my ex doesn't like to be confrontational so there's no way for him to tell me this himself.
The reason is I always get my way and we argue a lot. 4 example, the remote is always in my hand, and things like this. But I always have the remote b/c he always told me to watch whatever I want and gave it to me. And now I know actually he does mind that. But how was I supposed to know that since he's always told me to do whatever I want and been super nice to me.
Sometimes we argue but I thought that was just some fun convo. But apparently he took it seriously and thought to be one of the reasons we should break up. He's not perfect in many ways, like when there's a problem he doesn't let me know about it, but I do want him. I'm gonna go to him on Wednesday, what should I say or do to get him realize now that I know what the problems are and we can make this work?
2006-08-21 05:02:36 · 13 answers · asked by little asian gal in cresent city 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe you should watch a movie: "The Breakup" with Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn. It's necessary for couples to communicate with each other openly. Just like what Vince said to Jennifer in the movie "I'm not a mind reader." Guys don't know what girls are thinking and vice versa. Sometimes you have to spell it out. Communicate your wants and needs. Listen to his wants and needs as well. Find a common ground.
You want him, so go get him. Tell him how you really feel. Give him a chance to share with you how he feels. He's not perfect and neither are you. You can make it work, if you decide to do so together (with your guy). Relationships are all about give and take. Don't just keep on taking. Your guy wants to feel special as well. So make him feel special. He'll want to return the favor. Hope you have a fulfilling and satisfying relationship with your partner. Good luck!
2006-08-21 05:19:34 · answer #1 · answered by V for Viva 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am going to tell you that he wont communicate with you and he wont believe you. He left you for a reason because he didn't feel comfortable with you and he wont give up the feeling he has right now. I think it is time to move on and find someone that you can argue with and attempt to control that is more open and will tell you what to do once in a while without being afraid of hurting your feelings
2006-08-21 12:12:14 · answer #2 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot say or do anything to make your relationship work unless HE wants it to work as much as you do. You could tell him that you would like to try to improve your relationship by talking about ways for him to let you know when he really does not like something you are doing, without arguing. Begin by telling him that you are willing to compromise with him so he can truly, enjoy being with you because you care for him. However, you must be honest and he must be willing to communicate and to identify and revise his communication strategies. Best wishes to you.
2006-08-21 12:24:59 · answer #3 · answered by Jess4rsake 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell him that your sorry if you did anything to hurt him and that he needs to communicate with you more about the things that bother him cause its really not ur fault if he is letting you do all this and not telling you it bothers him tell him u really love him and u dont want it to end and ur willing to do something to make it work between you two and if he still wants to brake up let him go and give him space trust me if he loves you he will come rite back to you. Hope this helped
2006-08-21 12:14:44 · answer #4 · answered by lola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When guys give everything to be nice to you, you aren't supposed to walk all over them. You need to respect him and sometimes be able to say something like ' I can't pick what to watch tonight, will you find something for us to enjoy?' and then don't let him stop until you know it is something he likes, and watch it whether or not you like it. Treat him just the same as he treats you. It's called appreciation and will bring a successful realtionship about.
2006-08-21 12:13:14 · answer #5 · answered by joesdreamgirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u kno...i think sex is the answer...i swear.ask him for "one last time" and make him the boss,as a show of faith in the relationship....i think its a much better and more interesting way to get him back.
i usually dont suggest the sex but i think it sounds fun,and wud be memorable,thereby being a huge step up b4 u even take the baby step like the remote and such.
the possibilties with the "your the boss" deal are endless if hes a cool boyfreind,itll get him thinkn even if he says no.
2006-08-21 12:14:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well since you've made up your mind to talk to him, go ahead. Or else, if it doesn't work, do nothing. His mind is made up. They always come back at some point or the other & i'm speaking from experience. Didn't happen to me just once. 2 ex bfs are trying to get me back.
2006-08-21 12:12:21 · answer #7 · answered by prettyinpink 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like he expects you to just read his mind and know his feelings. Tell him that. He might be the nice/sensitive type so he tells you to do what you want to be nice while neglecting what he really wants. Tell him that you would rather have him tell you what he wants to do then him keep it inside and get bitter about it. He needs to communicate and if he can't do it, it's not going to work.
2006-08-21 12:11:40 · answer #8 · answered by dignified77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do yourself a favor, just cut your losses and find a new Friend who isn't so passive aggressive. Honestly - do you want to go around trying to guess what this wishywashy boy likes and doesn't like and wait for him to break up w/ you again because he can't communicate w/ you directly?
2006-08-21 12:11:57 · answer #9 · answered by workingclasshero 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
treat others as you would like to be treated even if you aren't forced or compelled to do so. I don't think you a dimwit, maybe a little selfish. put yourself in your b/f place and think how it would make you feel
2006-08-21 12:11:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋