Is it ok for your bf to "look" at other woman?

Question

We have been together for four years. When we are out he is always checking out other woman. He says he loves me and is just looking. He says I am being insecure and there is nothing wrong with looking as long as he doesnot touch. Any opinions???

Answer 1

Sure he can look but he should do so respectfully. He doesn't have to ogle other woman. If he was smooth, you would not be able to determine if he was looking or not. I know that there will always be other women around for him to look at as well as there will be other men around that you may find attractive. Both of you will look at others but the key is RESPECT. You should not be able to follow his eyes and see him undressing a woman right in your face. That is foul. You may be insecure but his actions may have fueled your insecurity. Ask yourself if he looks at you with admiration and desire as well. If he doesn't, mention that to him. Tell him that you want to be his fantasy because he is yours. Tell him that you know that he can see other women's outer attributes but that he shouldn't take your love and commitment lightly because if he looks deep into your eyes, he'll surely see that love is staring him right in the face. Don't whine or pout. Just put your feelings out there and trust that he will take them into consideration and show you some respect.

Answer 2

I answered a similar question a while ago and this answer still applies: It doesn't matter where you get your appetite, as long as you dine at home.
As long as he is just looking, not openly and critique comparing them with you, this is just a male thing. Do you point out attractive men to him? Give him a dose of his own medicine. But don't make a big deal of it unless he is acting very disrespectfully towards you or embarrassing.
If his looking IS making you feel insecure, don't admit it to him, but quietly take a look at yourself and him and see what the causes may be. Insecurity unaddressed can break up an otherwise good relationship.

Answer 3

I know how much this issue bothers women. They want to be the one and only girl on their guy's radar. I would say that he needs to learn to respect your feelings. If he is telling you that he is just looking and is insecure, there is a deeper problem there. Tell him this. "Do you love and respect me?" You know he will say, "Yes!" of course. After this say, "If you love me and respect me, please stop looking at other girls!" If he has a problem with this, DUMP HIM!!! He does not love you and respect you if he thinks its ok to be "just looking".

Here is the simple thing you must understand. Your boyfriend probably has a deeper problem. He is probably involved in some hardcore pornography or has slept with several girls before which is why he acts this way. He probably also masturbates too much and only respects you for your body. After all, he is allowed to check out other girls??? Give me a break! I would never check out other girls in a relationship. And if I ever did, I would not snap back at my gf if she said it bothered her. Your bf sounds a little screwed up, and you cannot fix the way he is screwed up. If he will not respect you, either deal with it or move on.

Answer 4

In general i think it is ok for a man to look at other women but personally, myself, i don't like the idea.
I have been going out with my bf for 2 years and i still hate it if he looks at other women which he is bound to do.
I think it is so much easier if you talk to your bf about exactly how u feel and make sure you trust him 100% because if you don't trust him completely the situation feels much worse than it really is. If your bf is constantly checking out other women that is not fair on you and u should definately tell him how you feel and make sure he knows how he is making you feel by checking out other women
xx nikki

Answer 5

Looking and not touching is one thing, but a guy who makes the looking totally obvious and just stares and gawks at the girl is a player and doesn't care only about you. Trust me. If his looking makes you feel like running away because you feel embarrassed, invisible, or like an idiot for being with him, then get rid of him.

Answer 6

I am in the same position as you honey, my man does the same thing and it is really bothersome to me, they are being disrespectful to us. I have told him it was disrespectful and he stills does it even though he thinks I don't be looking and I have gotten advices about he shouldn't do it. I am insecure to and hope for the best for you because my man is doing the same thing right now. Email me

Answer 7

I gave up on trying to get upset everytime my man looks at pretty girls. So, I join in on it. If I notice a pretty girl, i say something right away like, "Wow, she is really pretty huh?" then he'll usually say, "Not as pretty as you" then he'll smile and give me a kiss. Make sure that you point her out. If you don't and catch him looking, it will make things really uncomfortable for him and you. Start joining in on the fun. Make sure that if you see a cute guy, you do the same thing. Say, "Oh look honey, he's cute! But not as cute as you sunshine!" and kiss him or grab his butt.

Answer 8

For me there's nothing wrong with that as long as u both trust and love each other. it's the only thing that keeps the bonding between the two of you no matter what.

Answer 9

You are being insecure. There is nothing wrong with looking or appreciating another's beauty.

Answer 10

It is natural for a man to look at and admire other women, you should be worried if he is not looking at them.One sensible woman said, " I don't care where he gets his appetite as long as he eats at home".