When he starts up giving me money again he gives me 40 dollars a week and saids he can live with that and he goes to see him like twice a month or even less i have him in court rite now for child support do u think i should just take custody all by myself i have the money to maintain him myself the only reason i ask him for money is cause if he wants to see him he has to help out but i think that my son is not good for him to see his dad one day and not again for another month wat do u think i should do??
2006-08-21 02:32:29 · 11 answers · asked by lola 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think you have the right idea. If this guy can't be a responsible father to his son, then your son doesn't need that kind of example as a rule model in his future. The guy doesn't seem to care so you and your son is better off without him weaving in and out of your lives.
You can find someone new if you don't have anyone yet who will be a good father to your son and accept him as his own.
2006-08-21 02:55:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, in the end it's up to you, but let me tell you my situation. I'll try to make this long story very short...
I have an 8 year old son. His "sperm donor" has not seen him since he was 1. He was/is a low life drinking, drugs, no steady job, etc. Bottom line I felt no money in the world was worth my son growing up watching him and possibly turning out like him. My son doesn't know him and doesn't really care right now. When my son was 6 months old (sperm donor still in our lives) I found someone else who is still a wonderful dad to my son. My son occasionally wonders about him, but now that he's 8 we've talked about why I had to keep him out of our lives. I think your son needs a good role model and it doesn't sound like he is.
If you need to talk more or need anything else please feel free to email me. Good Luck!
A note on what some others said about they "force" him to pay child support and lock him up. NOT TRUE! My "dad" owes my mom over $35,000 for my sister and I and he goes to court w/ my mom, claims to not have a job, but gets paid cash. He has NEVER been put in jail. He hasn't pd since I was 15 and I'm 25!
2006-08-21 03:09:40 · answer #2 · answered by ******* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good job take his but to court because your son first of all didn't ask to be in this world and you sure didn't make him by yourself i have two childrens that i have to deal with dead beat dad but you know what he want run for too long with this 40 dollars. Once court handles those paperwork and he's working you will see more money. If he was a real father he would step up and take care of his child and see him more often . Don't worry if you have to me moma and daddy but he will get what he deserves. Good Luck to you and hope everything works out for you in court.
2006-08-21 02:41:40 · answer #3 · answered by BabyGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you have to explain to him that if he doesn't start helping out more that your going for custody. But you shouldn't get money from him because he comes and sees his son. He should wanna see his son and he should be giving you more money then 40$ a week.You should go for full custody because it seems to me that he just wants to see his son when he wants too at least this way you can say when he gets to see his son if you have full custody, plus your gonna get more money by bringing him to court so i wish you good luck
2006-08-21 02:44:11 · answer #4 · answered by gerry d 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, if he is paying the child support, that he is told by the court to pay, he probably will have visitation rights. Discuss this with your attorney. Courts usually allow the child to see both parents, unless you can prove, beyond a doubt that he is an unfit father. It's a touchy situation.
2006-08-21 02:50:20 · answer #5 · answered by kayboff 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your are right and have to think of your son he will better off with out him.And you seem like a strong person and have a good head on your shoulders so i think you should do this for your son and yourself.It hurts your son to see his dad that little time only and it hurts your because that is your baby and bothers us when we see our babies now matter what age hurting. Your son may only be 2 but as he gets older it will be harder for him to see only his dad that short time so it is best to do this when he is younger and for you as well ...and boys tend to learn things from their dads and have behaviors patterns as well and I'm sure that you would not want him learning that it is OK for him to see his children like this as he gets old enough to have them ..God Bless you and your son and you both will be fine on your own my son and I do just fine on our own ...Take CARE you are doing the right thing..
2006-08-21 03:28:45 · answer #6 · answered by kutiepye28 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can support him yourself....forget the deadbeat. Try to develop a good relationship with your son, but never put his father down in front of him. It will not do either of you any good. Don't equate $ with visits. This will only make things difficult. Let the courts decide, but remember if he pays, he will have visitation rights.
2006-08-21 02:45:33 · answer #7 · answered by Rea 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if the dad is such a low life rather get custody of your child and keep him away from his dad. you'll find someone else who will love you and your child and be a better role model.
2006-08-21 03:37:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my father abuses me. So i would really rather not be with him. If his father is really as much as a low life as you say, you rson will probably be neglected or abused with him. WHatever you do dont let that happen to him! Try to get child support and supervized visits.
2006-08-21 02:58:42 · answer #9 · answered by Broken_Inside 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take his low life *** to court and see if they can garnish his checks so that money will go to your child.
2006-08-21 03:20:44 · answer #10 · answered by sandiegogal2002@yahoo.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋