How do you handle a man who?

Question

sometimes shows care and attention to you but on other time (if you care him back and give affection to him) he can be so doesnt care about you at all??

This make me confused, coz sometimes i think that he likes me but sometimes i also think he has no special feeling at all to me..

1. What should I do???
2. How to find out whether he really likes me or not?? By asking him directly? do u think it's a good idea? i dont think i can do it..

Please help me and so many thanks!!!!

Answer 1

Ask yourself: Is this the way that I want to live my life? Sounds like the guy is controlling, pulling your strings emotionally to keep you off balance. It is his little mental mind game. He will never change. If you want to live like that, keep it up. If not, drop him and find someone who can treat you as well as you deserve.

~The Fat Lady

Answer 2

First of all, you may have the wrong idea. It might be romantic, but unreasonable to expect your man to go cooing after you all the time.
:)

So first, analyze objectively if he actually DOES detatch from you at times, or whether you just feels he does.

Perhaps he goes into a moody reverie at times. It just might be his nature. Maybe when you can try approaching him at such times saying "What's wrong? I can sense you're bothered by something" or something like that.

Don't over-react. Take things in stride. And if he really likes you, wait it out. You'll find out soon enough. Just be prepared. There's no point building your hopes up too much until you're certain...

:)

Answer 3

Most men like to take the initiative. It's the hunter instinct in them. However if you have a good relationship it shouldn't matter who shows care and attention. Perhaps he is the shy type. Give him the benefit of the doubt and ask him

Answer 4

I cud suggest u a book, 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus', Ignore it, if u read it! But, I suggest this b'coz, it'as made well clear that men and women r from two different worlds. Their thinking patterns, their needs & wants, their giving, their way of coping with things, the language they use for love are different. More it says, the problem between men & women r prominent jus coz they don't understand each others differences! The authoir makes it clear like how a loving words from a man cause a disgust and hatefulness in women (examples)! If u've not read it, go get one.., it worths reading... for you and for everyone...

Again Artin... (found u'r q on your profile page..)

Answer 5

Sounds to me like this guy may be afraid of getting his hopes up with you or getting hurt. (has he had a hurtfull break up that you are aware of) or perhaps he may have a friend who has got there eye on you and although he likes you he doesn't want to step on anyones toes. Just try and get a little bit closer to him and see what his reactions are after giving it a little more time. Seems like you are sending all the right signalls to him

Answer 6

I'm in a similar situation, and I'd say just forget about him. No point wasting effort on someone that could just be messing you about. I know that its great when he is loving, but if you need someone to be like that all the time, then this guy isn't the one for you. Before you end it, I'd just ask him wht he thinks, and if he wants you. Good luck!

Answer 7

Most of the time honesty is the best policy,,and if you can not bring yourself to ask him directly,,then write down how you feel and ask him how he feels.Sometimes writing how you feel on paper makes both parties feel not so pressured,,pluss gives them time to think more clearly as to how they realy feel,,try it,,you never know till you do.

Answer 8

me and my X bf have the same problem, but i found the he was cheating on me. but that doesn't mean that ur bf is cheating on u, but be careful he may have a big secret other than cheating. i think u should talk about it, i know it SOOOOO hard but try, start by saying "do u like me to care about u?" for example or some thing like this. i know its hard but that's what will help u.
any way gd luck

Answer 9

I think you should dump him. He's a jerk. He's playing mind games with you and that gets old very quickly. I say get out now and cut your losses. There are plenty of men out there who will treat you better. All the best.

Answer 10

You ask him what the hell is going on and where u stand...if he gives u an answer that doesn't make sense or isn't completely clear...dump him...he is a loser and probably like to have his cake and eat it too...if u know what i mean.