Why do people want to have children when they know how hard the world is & how hard their own lives have been?

Question

This is one of my top reasons for why i don't wish to have my own child.
We all know the world is such a hard place, so why do it?
My mental life has been hard for me. since i wasn't raised in poverty..everyone from a 3rd world country will laugh at me, saying i know nothing of a hard life. But i speak of mental/emotional challenges too. I know my life isn't that hard at all. it's a luxury to some of course.
Whenever i see a newborn i may feel sorry for it. I know that newborn will have a harder time in that new society to come than i have had. Don't you think they'll experience probably worse physical or emotional problems in their life than you will? And yes, that is part of life, so then why procreate at all? All i'd want to do is love that child, but i guess i mean love without the real world discipline..which they say isn't love. I want to see my offspring never suffer, never frustrate, never contemplate suicide, never be lonely. (yes i know i'm idealistic)

Answer 1

I've always wanted to be a father so I can be good to my children and show them the good in the world... and have fun with them (play sports, go to movies, go hiking, learn new things, etc.) and show them love. I want to be the best father I could be to them.

Answer 2

Life has hardships. Period. That doesn't mean it's not worth living. The setbacks and hardships and suffering enables to grow as people. It's not easy. But that doesn't mean it's /bad/. We often tend to view anything that causes us sadness or distress as a horrible thing that we should be rid of. But life would be awful, I think, if it was all roses and happiness. How could you ever really appreciate true love if you'd never known heartbreak or loneliness? How could ever appreciate life, if there was no death? It'd be meaningless to you. Just another thing that existed.

No one wants to see anyone suffer. But I don't believe that just living is equal to suffering. Nor do I believe that future generations will have MORE problems, or worse ones. Only different ones.

I believe life is precious. Even with all the hardships and troubles that I've had, I wouldn't want to have just... never lived it. There are good things in this world, too. Many of them. To deny someone the chance to experience love, to watch the sunrise, to breath fresh air, to eat chocolate chip cookies, to make friends, to learn... just because they will also experience sadness, or loneliness, or frustration... that, to me, would be the real tragedy.

Life is largely what you make of it. If all you can see if suffering, you aren't looking hard enough for the treasures.

Answer 3

Not everyone views the world like you do...when I look at the world I see hope for a better future if everyone would just pitch in and help. Yet, I'm also not sure about kids because they are a big responsibility, a big expense, and the world may very well be really environmentally messed up by the time they'd be adults (not to mention over population). The last of my reasons is why I will strongly consider adoption prior to having kids naturally...basically to help those who are already here.

Answer 4

your not idealistic and to be honest you are what i would consider to be a wonderful role model for a child
i grew up with not such a great life , and i made sure that my children would not suffer as i did
and my 3 children are really really wonderful , with great morals and good judgement
i too felt as you did once , that i didn't want to bring children into this world
but you know what ... if people like you and i and others who feel the same , raise our children in such a way that the next generation will be good characters , strong , positive and with a great love for others ... maybe the world wont be such a bad place to live xx

Answer 5

In England there was a survey conducted, they counted how much a child would cost to get from zero years old to 18 years old...

They calculated the figure £107,000 (about $200,000 US) per child.

I calculated that if I never have a child, save the money and I could buy a Ferrari instead...

SO I DID

What you said was probably true as well, but I got a groovy car out of my line of reasoning

Answer 6

If all the people had your ideas there would be no life on earth, life is not easy and it never was, but children are the best thing that can happen to a person, I never imagined how much you can love somebody till I had my own flesh and blood, they are the light of my life, I'm sure it will not be easy for them, they have to work hard and they have to be strong but that is the way life is for everybody, all I can do is pray for them and hope that God will stand by them and protect them, but I can never imagine my life without them.

Answer 7

thats what life is, life has many obstacles and many rewards, and in my belief the love for your own child is one of the most purest forms of love that there is.
And how do you know that the baby won't grow up to be stronger and more influencial then you? If you don't like the scenary change the picture

Answer 8

What if my child makes the world a better place? I have two sons at University right now, one Aerospace Engineering and one Civil Engineering.

I trust in God to take care of things, He is more capable than I.

Answer 9

Well what if your parents had thought that? It is your place to make the world a better place for your kids at the same time teaching them reality about the world around them..

Answer 10

if we could all teach our children love and respect for eachouther instead of greed and hate then mabey our children could be the hope of our futer. just look at the rubbish...for example that they put on tv for our kids . i remember waking up on sunday morning and watchig porkey pig and popeye . now unless you pay for cable...the only cartoons on for our kids is animee. it sad, its no woner every generation is more screwed up than the last.
we need to pull togeather and stop all the violence our kids are being exposed to. untill that happens i fear that you may be right my friend.