And will you try to influence them always? Do you feel it is your duty?
2006-08-20 18:29:07 · 9 answers · asked by *** The Earth has Hadenough*** 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
There is a very simple answer to this. As a parent you have 3 stages to go through. Nurturing, Guiding and supporting. Nurturing is done while the child is in infancy;loving and generating a bond that will be shared for the rest of your lives together. Guiding begins when you decide it is your right as a parent to teach your child how to act socially, morally and help him/her to become a well read, caring citizen of the world.this is the portion of parenting where discipline, acting as a "parent" by limiting and allowing your child to realize that you are an adult, he/she is a child and needs your guidance. The third phase is supporting. Your role as guider is over. You must allow your child to take the lessons in life you have given him/her and put them to use. The hardest part of this phase is; a) Knowing where to start it and end the guidance process and b) allow yourself to be fully supportive no matter what choices your child picks. Even if those choices are against your beliefs you MUST support them because they are an adult now, just like you are,and they, not you, must live with their choices. Support can come in ways of emotional, monetary or otherwise but this is the role you will be in for the rest of your child's life. Give him/her suggestions, not guidance. If they choose not to heed them then the outcome will be theirs. I hope this has helped you.
2006-08-20 18:44:37 · answer #1 · answered by AbsintheLover 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your right to "control" your kids ends the minute they really DO know everything!
I don't influence, I protect, and I don't feel it's my duty, I feel it's my love.
2006-08-21 01:53:16 · answer #2 · answered by vspaulo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I try not to control my kids, but raise them to become responsible adults who make good decisions and are in control of themselves. I hope I will be able not to influence them directly after they moved out, but hope the values I taught them in their younger years will do that instead of my direct input. That doesn't mean I will not be there for advice when needed or asked for.
2006-08-21 01:41:45 · answer #3 · answered by sabina-2004@sbcglobal.net 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your "right" ends when they turn the age your state considers them adults, (or if they sue for emancipation earlier and win.) But of course you always try to influence them for good throughout their lives, (if you are a good parent.) Of course if you are a dink you will never try to influence them for good.
2006-08-21 01:35:45 · answer #4 · answered by Mr. Curious 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have the "right" to tell them what they can and can't do until they are considered of legal age...but i think you can stop "controlling" them once you see that they can make good choices on their own, even if it's not what you would do. This depends on how well you raised them. You just have to let them be their own person.
2006-08-21 01:41:30 · answer #5 · answered by jade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say when they turn 18 or when they move out of the house. If they are still living at home then you should have some say since they are in your house and you are most likely paying for it.
2006-08-21 02:47:33 · answer #6 · answered by <3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when they have thier own house and pay their own bills and there isnt a fear of them coming back to live with us again!
2006-08-21 01:52:59 · answer #7 · answered by happy-go-lucky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you never have the right, i feel sorry for you kids
2006-08-21 01:34:44 · answer #8 · answered by skippy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no end to it
2006-08-21 01:42:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋