Her extreme emotional dysregulation and fears of abandonment have caused lots of problems in our relationship and for me, but I don't know if it will be helpful or destructive to tell her about this--I don't think she would take it well or accept it, but shouldn't someone be given this information? I'm 95%+ sure she either has BPD, or at least exhibits strong BPD tendences.
2006-08-20 14:22:10 · 4 answers · asked by robert b 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Yeah--over the telephone.
Seriously, though, I don't think I'd walk up to anyone and tell them that you suspect that they have BPD specifically. If they do, in fact, have this problem then you're just asking for all kinds of grief.
A better approach might be to sit her down and talk to her about going to therapy in the generic: "When you do X, it makes me feel Y. I really care about you and I think we need to find out why this is happening." That sort of thing. Maybe even do therapy as a couple at first; many times the therapist will hold individual sessions as things progress. If she refuses to go, then go without her anyway. At the very least, you're going to need some strategies for dealing with her.
Good luck!
2006-08-20 14:32:02 · answer #1 · answered by Claude 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her to get into therapy for the emotional dysregulation, etc. Go to one of the sessions with her and ask the therapist for his diagnosis. If your wife is open, then, sure tell her. Being borderline myself, I would not take offense to it. We realize our tendencies even without a label.
2006-08-20 22:30:38 · answer #2 · answered by catzrme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No one but a doctor can determine whether or not your wife has any type of mental illness, regardless of her symptoms. Sit down with her and discuss speaking to someone outside of the family that can maybe help the two of you with the problems you're having. Sitting down and putting any sort of blame on your wife alone will only cause her to become defensive and then create more problems.
2006-08-20 21:48:51 · answer #3 · answered by Miss Rose 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask the therapist what they think
2006-08-21 01:00:43 · answer #4 · answered by mochi.girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋