We've done everything to try to help her, she isn't ready so we stopped. Now her parents have blown their retirement supporting her and we can't convince them its 'enabling' her. (They pay for her house, bills, groceries) And now they are broke, my grandpa had to take a job and he is in no shape for that.
2006-08-20 13:14:38 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I don't think you have a question in there, more of a statement. I have had more than my fair share of dealing with alcoholics and you are absolutely correct...you have to cut them off. You don't want to...and it is hard...but it HAS to be done. She is not going to stop until she absolutely wants to...no matter what. Unfortunately most parents feel entirely (and completely not true) responsible for the actions of their children...like they are somehow responsible. I don't think you'll convince them to stop...just as you won't convince your mom she needs to stop drinking. Maybe suggest they go to counseling to see what they are doing is harming their daughter since they don't see how it is hurting them?
2006-08-20 13:25:04 · answer #1 · answered by Jenny Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Non Functioning Alcoholic
2016-11-02 01:01:25 · answer #2 · answered by vesely 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being drunk may seem like a lot of fun and might be a great way to socialise and forget about your everyday problems. However at the same time frame it can be quite bad for you – leaving you dizzy and forgetful and meaning you are likely to vomit. Which means it's definitely not appropriate for every situation and that it may be dangerous too much. Having the ability to quickly sober back up then is an essential skill that we can look at here.
You could have a quick look on google for “quit drinking John Dawkins program” to have the method which we used to help with alcoholism.
Thanks a million and please keep up the rewarding work.
2015-12-22 12:18:20 · answer #3 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For people who are suffering from both mental illness and substance abuse, AA is often the wrong place to go. There is a large anti-medication, anti-therapy faction that keep many from seeking the kind of help they need to combat both problems.
Call your local office of the National Alliance for Mental Illness. They would probably have the best advice.
Perhaps you and your grandparents could find out about programs in your area and explain to your mother that unless she seeks some sort of help, they can't continue to foot all the bills.
2006-08-20 19:20:14 · answer #4 · answered by raysny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your mom will never ever learn to stand on her own if her parents are enablers. A person has to hit rock bottom and I mean rock bottom. If that means out on the street with no money then so be it. She will have to admit to herself that she needs help and the only way to achieve that is through rehab. Only then will she realize what she has done to her parents. I assume they are older and retired..they should cut off immediatly all support financially. It's a shame they have already spent so much but she is an adult and she will never learn responsiblity as long as some one supports her. Sad but very true
2006-08-20 13:27:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry to hear that, but your grandparents are enabling her. You all either have to accept it and continue supporting her, or you all need to get together as a team and give her an ultimatum - get treatment or we (you) don't want to know you (her) anymore. She could sell her house, pay back her parents, pay for therapy, and then she'd hopefully be okay enough afterwards to be able to support herself.
Goodluck!
2006-08-20 13:24:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this may sound strange, but your grandparents are just as sick as your mom is, right now.. its called co-dependency...
as long as they allow her to keep going, she will keep going.. she may not even realize there is a problem because its working for her.. in your moms mind, there might be no need to change anything... unless your mom realizes there is a problem, she wont stop until her enabling parents decide to stop... and even IF her parents stop enabling her, she may take a while to figure it out
i wish you and your family the best of luck.. and try calling alanon or alateen... its a support group for families of alcoholics
2006-08-23 10:35:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This Site Might Help You.
RE:
My mom's a non functioning alcoholic /depression, dependent on her parents.?
We've done everything to try to help her, she isn't ready so we stopped. Now her parents have blown their retirement supporting her and we can't convince them its 'enabling' her. (They pay for her house, bills, groceries) And now they are broke, my grandpa had to take a job...
2015-08-14 16:41:14 · answer #8 · answered by Madeleine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie its never easy to see someone you love going through this. and it isn't easy when your the parent of an alcoholic. My son is still in denial and there isnt anything that I can do to help him but be there when he needs me.. I dont have money so I cant help him in that way. I think joining Al Anon support grp would help you and your grandparents . It will help you cope and give you the support that is needed during these hard times...good luck sweetie....Jo
2006-08-20 13:43:46 · answer #9 · answered by goldstarzs 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yikes. I hope that from watching her you have learned a lesson about both the idea of staying away from drugs and alcohol... and also about staying clear in your mind about how you CAN'T enable a sick person at the expense of your own life.
Good luck. Sorry you have to go through this.
2006-08-20 13:21:48 · answer #10 · answered by teachinmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋