Why are people always saying that looks don't matter when they do?

Question

I just read an online article entitled, "Tips for making chit chat on a first date". A 37 year old woman from Ohio had written in wanting to know what were some good things to talk about on a first date. As it turns out, there was a whole page of responses, and along with each response there was a photo of the person who had posted it. Amazingly, every one of these people were very attractive people. There wasn't an average or below average looking person in the group. So, what that does that tell you? It tells me that unless you're a good looking man or a beautiful woman, your chances of making a good first impression are slim and none. And you know what they say about "a good first impression". Also, it tells me that we, as a society, are obssesed with the outer appearance of others and care little about what's inside another person's heart. Just look at the magazines in the stores and you'll see what I'm talking about. Agree or disagree?

Guess you could say that if others find you initally unattractive, you've got little chance in the dating game. Right?

Are people really that superficial?

Answer 1

i think they mean that looks dont matter in the long run, cuz what usually firsts attracts some1 is their looks!

Answer 2

From what I know, there is a chemical in our brains that instantly react to beauty, I even seen a study where a baby was shown pictures of ugly and beautiful people and the baby chose the beautiful people every time. Even though it seems sad, looks do matter, second personality, because what do you have to go off of when you first see someone?????? you guessed right! LOOKS. Me personally, I probably would not run to the chance to talk to someone in raggedy ugly clothes with 6 teeth that hasnt shaved in weeks and is balding...im sorry, but that is me. But if I had to I would and would be friends with the person if they had a nice personality, but really that is human...dont tell that lie that you would jump to an opportunity to just walk up and talk to the person I just described!! Looks may not be everything, but they are SOMETHING!!

Answer 3

Hmm it is almost 9:00pm where is the lemo! Looks are semi important does that make it ok? Personality is pretty key. For me looking good never hurt anyone. It is a matter of preference I don't feel it is a matter of being pretentious really. You forgot about the age factor too! That plays an important role as well, for some. Truly, love is like finding a needle in a haystack.

Answer 4

People can try to deny it as much as they'd like but it's a proven fact that looks do matter in a way.. You always hear people talking about how having a good personality is more important than looks but you can't get to know someone's personality unless you know the person first.. you can't look at someone and say they have a good personality so honestly you have to be attracted to someone physically before you can get to know them emotionally..

Answer 5

I don't think it's a fact of being superficial. When you first meet someone, what's the first thing you see? What's on the outside. It's not like in the first min you're gonna know what they're like on the inside. A person's appearance is what first attracts you to them...if you make it to the first date, then obviously that person liked what they saw. The article was merely stating how to make a first date go along smoother. I met my husband online, and didn't see his picture till a week before his first visit to see me, yet since I had gotten the chance to get to know him, I saw past his flaws (as he saw past mine...like my big nose lol). I saw him for what he was on the inside first because I didn't see the outside. Point being...if someone doesn't know what you're like on the inside, all they're going to see is the outside.

Answer 6

From life experience here looks do matter to girls at younger ages meaning teen years. When women grow up and mature and become adults they do tend to look deeper than the skin. So if your a teen just hang in there the older these girls get the more they look beyond the outside. It may also have nothing to do with your looks at all either but maybe how you are going about trying to hook them and what your saying.

Answer 7

Without reading the article that you have written, I will just answer the initial question...looks matter to a certain degree. Have you ever met a girl that was just knock out hot only to find out she couldn't carry a conversation in a bucket? How attracted to her were you? If she is dumb, it doesn't matter what she looks like, you aren't going to date her. So to a certain degree, looks do not matter. Obviously, you have to be somewhat attracted to her/him to be interested but looks are only a part of it.

Answer 8

It's pounded into our brains that physical beauty is what it's all about. It's not until a person matures emotionally that we see that the opposite is true. Even at 37, if looks still matter to her, she needs to grow up more.

Answer 9

I was just reading that article myself and was wondering the same thing. i agree people always say looks don't matter, but you just have to look at the media-women and men who have no talent have a carrer just base on their looks. I think people always say that looks don't matter because they don't want to be looked as conceited and stuff. Its sad that people are so obsess with looks that they're not willing to look pass ones exterior.

Answer 10

Looks should never be important. It's the personality and what makes the person beautiful
Is what's inside them. Looks don't last forever. No matter how much plastic surgery you have.

Answer 11

sure i agree. we're a society filled with people who are obsessed with weight, chest/penis size, hair, make-up, plastic surgery, etc... I blame the media mostly for showing people how they "should" look. So yeah I guess looks do matter, unless you're blind of course.