my girl friend wants to get married and we are only 17 and i dont want to at the moment im not ready but i dont want to break it off with her because i have been with her for 3 years pls i need some advice what can i tell her HELP
2006-08-20 12:56:55 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Tell her exactly what you typed. If she really loves you, she should understand.
Good Luck!
2006-08-20 14:03:19 · answer #1 · answered by 2cute4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do love her (you only said you didn't want to break up because it's been "3 years"), tell her you can't marry her because you wouldn't be able to give your all to the marriage at this point. You can tell you love her and in a few years (after college/working a little while) you will know one another better and will be emotionally and financially prepared for this big step. Just be sure she knows it isn't her!
On the other hand, being together three years is no reason to stay together. If you don't love her, now would be the time to break it off; staying with her is only wasting both your time and hers! Do what you know is right.
2006-08-20 20:12:16 · answer #2 · answered by Jenny Alice 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
17 is much too young to get married no matter how much you think you love each other. So much changes over time particularly in this day and age. Tell her that you will consider getting engaged after college or the military or you turn 21 or such. It will give you both time to experience something besides high school together. Tell her that you want your relationship to last a life time and so you need some more time to mature together before taking on the commitment. It will make your bond stronger and I'm sure she wants that. Good luck.
2006-08-20 20:30:52 · answer #3 · answered by empressfrancis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get married. Give her a promise ring but tell her you aren't ready for the real deal. She will love the promise ring, you can stay in the relationship and if things don't work out the break up will be much easier than divorce.
ps... you are doing the right thing, wait for now... you can always get married later.
2006-08-20 20:56:48 · answer #4 · answered by bluechick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her know that you are not ready, that you want to go to college and get your degree and that getting married right out of high school (while it will not be a stopping force) will slow down your ability to make a good living for you and her. Let her know that you want to be a good provider. She will love you more for it, if she is resonable. If not, then you may have to break up with her. Do not marry or agree to marry someone when you are not ready, it is just a recipe for disaster.
2006-08-20 20:29:37 · answer #5 · answered by mom of girls 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friend got engaged at 17, her boyfriend was 20. But They did not get married for 3 years. She graduated High School, moved in with him and then got married. When he asked her to marry him, he told her that he did not want to get married then, but in the future. This may work for you two. Or you could use a promise ring.
2006-08-20 21:06:29 · answer #6 · answered by funshinex4 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down and have a heart to heart talk with her and be honest about your feelings to her on the subject of getting married, I suggest waiting a few more years and date a little longer, because it will give you guys time to grow up a little more together and then you should be ready to get married then, Good Luck
2006-08-20 21:21:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The TRUTH will work. Tell her how you feel about her and that you just aren't ready. Don't let yourself be pressured into something you'll regret later. Be nice, be gentle, but most importantly be HONEST. You can also try giving a "promise ring". It might help settle her anxieties and let you both have time to decide waht you really want. Oh, and a dozen of her favorite flowers couldn't hurt.
2006-08-20 20:05:57 · answer #8 · answered by jen_customweddingsolutions 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her just what you told us, that you're only 17 and you're not ready for marriage. You both have alot of growing up to do. If she can't respect that decision, then you may have to break off the relationship, simply to avoid being miserable with her. Don't let her try to guilt you into doing something you're not ready to do. Best of luck to you.
2006-08-20 21:08:50 · answer #9 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
17 is way too young to get engaged - period! If she really wants to marry you than your relationship will still be going strong 3-4 years down the road and then you can think about it.
2006-08-20 20:16:46 · answer #10 · answered by Patricia D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How right you are not to want to get married at your tender age, you haven't lived yet. You must be frank with her and explain that you want to live your life before being tied down ( otherwise you'll regret it for the rest of your life and end up resenting her ) and that there's no way that you want to get married until you are at least10 years older - please don't allow her to pressurise you with her tears , threats or anything else. I wish you luck in every way.
2006-08-21 02:15:41 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋