I just feel that i give him 110% of my everything and it upsets me when i think that he doesn't do the same! i feel unfair.. what's wrong with me?
2006-08-20 12:07:58 · 16 answers · asked by Nadia Miller 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
the problem is, you are a female
he is a male
he will never, never, have the same feelings, attitudes, and activity about a relationship that you do
however, men are capable of being a part of beautiful loving relationships
I have watched lots of relationships come and go and fail and succeed and here are a few pointers that seem to make the difference:
* don't expect him to have the same feelings as you, his feelings are powerful, but different
* don't have sex with a guy until you are married, pre-marital sex ruins the balance and gives the male everything he thinks he needs but doesn't require any committment
* give him some space, but expect him to spend plenty of time with you also, tell him that you want to see him, make him make dates and keep them
* forgive weakness but not disloyalty
* be willing to walk away if the relationship is not progressing (this doesn't mean progressing every day or week but over the weeks if you aren't getting closer or better, and discussion and struggle don't help, be ready to move on)
2006-08-20 12:19:04 · answer #1 · answered by enginerd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not easy being rejected and even lonely. But we are in control of our emotions. If you give all your emotions to somebody, there's none left. That's why we ache and feel horrible for weeks! So...just remember that whatever experience you have it's called Life. You can learn from it. And...don't choose they same guys that have the same personalities -- where you know you will get dumped. You know the ones I mean. You prob find these guys exciting--but they aren't. They break your heart, you do it all for them, and they walk away and don't even care. You prob think "If I love them enough, they had a bad life, blah blah blah, they will love me." Not. They are dysfunctional human beings and the only thing a person can change--is himself. You can't do it. I can't do it. They have to change first. So...find a good real man who will love you and adore you. No more dysfunctional, sad, and trying to save man. They seem like they 'need and want you' and 'you are the only person who has ever been there for me' guys. Yeah right. Until it gets deep in the relationship and you wanna go to the next level, and ... poof...they are gone. You deserve to be loved, cherished and taken care of in a good way. So stop crying over them. It's a waste of tears!
2016-03-26 23:18:17 · answer #2 · answered by Marilyn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're either expecting too much or you just haven't found the right guy yet. Keep in mind that there are male and female stereotypes for a reason. Generally the girl does show a lot more affection and caring towards the guy. If that's not enough for you, maybe you'll just have to wait until you find a guy who can give as much as you.
2006-08-20 12:12:55 · answer #3 · answered by sarahjaniepoo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may be expecting someone to complete you. Complete yourself first and find your confidence. Give some of that love back to yourself or just keep it. You're not a slave you're a companion. Many people have depression and are often bi-polar. Changing your diet might help also. You could be lacking in essential vitamins/minerals to keep yourself balanced. You might consider getting some blood work done also.
2006-08-20 12:19:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to limit your output to his input. Never let anyone dominate you and make them give something back. You control the relationship and guys will do as Little as possible as long as they get what they want. Set an agenda and follow your guidelines in the next relationship. If a guy starts falling off in taking care of you let him know those days are over and in order to be Your Man ,he has to act like it and do for you like you will do for him.
2006-08-20 12:14:56 · answer #5 · answered by hardnose 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are expecting too much from them. Guys don't know how to react when you obsess and overpower them with your feelings. Every guy wants a girl who is self-sufficient! They dont want someone who is going to baby them, like their momma!
Try to relax first of all, then take each day and problem, with this guy one step at a time. If he doesn't treat you well, ditch him! If you just aren't happy with any guy....sounds like the problem might be how you feel about yourself.
2006-08-20 12:21:17 · answer #6 · answered by MandyHawk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to ask yourself what qaulities you are attracting in men and why. If you are always attracting insensitive men then you need to try and find a way to modify the way you approach dating. Typically people look for behaviors in other people they lack themselves. You need to be a whole person before you have a successful relationship.
2006-08-20 12:14:08 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You give too much - a common female problem. Quit giving more than you really want to. (You wouldn't feel this way if you weren't saying and doing things just to please him.) This attitude in you attracts losers and users. Only you can stop it by changing what you are willing to do to please the man in your life. Look for someone completely different from the type of man you're currently dating.
2006-08-20 12:15:40 · answer #8 · answered by R. F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because you are an sucker for that type of guy. you give and think that every guywill do the same.but sweetie plaese learn from this guys like that will always use you and in the end you will be alone. dump him and find someone who will love you for being you,don`t give anything .learn to take care of yourself.
2006-08-20 12:16:07 · answer #9 · answered by julie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its no them..its you. You are not happy with yourself. start working out. You need to feel good about yourself and the rest will follow
2006-08-20 12:13:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋