my sisters bi-polar, parties way too hard, and has major finacial and law issues. i live with her and keep her grounded and focused. im afraid if i leave she will just get worse. but shes holding me back from moving on with my life. i love her so much...i dont know what to do.
2006-08-20 10:30:37 · 14 answers · asked by kb 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Put yourself in her position.
2006-08-24 09:36:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be you. You are both adults. You cannot be held responsible for her choices.
Explain this to her, that you will always remain sisters and love her, however, you will no longer try to "save her" from herself.
Let her know, that you are there if she wants advice. But, don't feel bad if she does not follow it. Simply move on. She will lead her life in her ways. She may one day figure things out on her own and get well, and she will appreciate that you allowed her to find her way and you still loved and respected her. Leave your door open to her.
It will hurt to leave her be, but you also have to live. She does not worry about you and your life right now, you must get a grip on this.
2006-08-20 18:41:50 · answer #2 · answered by schnikey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should move on with your life but still help her out by giving her money once in a while and supporting her as much as you can. She needs to get used to being a little more independent. If you're always around for her she's going to get used to the fact if not already that you would always be there for her and that she wont feel the need to take care of herself. Maybe if she was involved in a relationship it would be much better for her and you.
2006-08-20 17:40:20 · answer #3 · answered by LilSo1287 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although you would like to stay with her forever and help keep her safe. That is not a wise choice for your health and safety! You cannot be her savior and protector all her life. Eventually, she will need to be able to handle things on her own. By staying with her, not only will you be hurting yourself, but her as well. You don't have to leave her this instant, but do it gradually. It's called tough love. It's the hardest thing to do, but the best for everyone. I know this from experience! I have practiced tough love. Good Luck!
2006-08-20 17:39:51 · answer #4 · answered by chrihutch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you already tried your best to help her....
if she doesn't change, it is not your fault.
i am in the similar situation like you.
my brother spent way to much money and i end up paid for everything then have him pay me back. it is almost 2 years and he still haven't paid me a cent yet. i didn't charge him any interest but if he doesn't change i would just let him go because as a brother i did whatever i can to help but i can't be there for him the rest of my life. i got my own life too. i would so hard to save my money and spend it wisely... at the end, even though i may not see my money again but at least i won't feel bad if anything happen to him. i did my part as a older brother.....
2006-08-20 19:45:29 · answer #5 · answered by matt0424 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry but you should move on with your own life and keep her in touch....i mean like move out.....but tell her why...and keep in touch every day to help her with what she needs. you cannot grow when all your doing is helping another person and forgetting about yourself , look into getting some help maybe like a visiting nurse they help clean cook and make sure she took her meds if she has any or make a system where you call her once a day at the same tme of day to talk...and stuff,,,,good luck
2006-08-20 17:38:24 · answer #6 · answered by mommaof2girls&1onway 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where are your parents,you are a very loving sister and friend who needs a break. Maybe it is time someone else took over for a bit. I am sorry you are all going through this. You are pretty special and rare, Take care ~A~
2006-08-20 17:38:41 · answer #7 · answered by momsapplepeye 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG!!! You are doing the right thing. But you might want to stay a little longer she might hurt her self doing the wrong thing. Tell her she's doing something wrong. Have a little meeting where it has beverages and snacks. Discuss the main issues. Tell me what happens next.
2006-08-20 17:39:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her the help she needs, then move out!!! You can't be responsible for someone who can't or will not help them self!!!! If she is a grown up !! People will do to you what you allow them to do to you, Remember this and keep it in your head!!!!!!!!! Your not keeping her grounded or focused if she's still getting in trouble and doing crazy things!! which sounds like it, or you wouldn't be asking for help!!!! She needs perfessional help not yours!!
2006-08-20 17:39:31 · answer #9 · answered by sports_runner_racing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave and move on.
Your sister has to learn to help herself.
And you need to get on with your own life. She is not your responsibility
2006-08-20 17:38:07 · answer #10 · answered by Danielle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your sis is a little on the wild then u need to sit down and talk to her and tell her that u have your own life to live!!!
2006-08-20 17:38:28 · answer #11 · answered by Cheer!Chick! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋