My 22 yr old brother was killed in a auto accident. He was also one of my best friends,can u help me through?

Question

this terrible time? I am not looking for someone to tell me to seek god I' ve heard plenty of that.

Answer 1

For starters, I dont know you , but I feel for you. This would probably be the hardest time you have gone through. I can understand about all the God preaching, it doesnt help. I too have lost someone very close to me,& it feels like there is a great big empty hole, yes they say time heals but it is sickening to keep hearing that. If you feel like talking talk to some one who is just going to listen, & only jump in if you ask, if you need to cry, go ahead, dont worry about any one elses thoughts or feelings, let your self allow to grieve the way you need to. Journalling my thoughts & feelings helped me alot,being by myself SOMETIMES. helped,and having a confidant that wouldn't judge my thoughts really helped. Yhe people most close to youneed to know what you are going through, otherwise it is hard for them to understand why you might need to take that extra long walk, etc.They also need to know what stage you are at , with your grieving , so if you do seek their support,it will be given without too much lecturing.Be open to the ones close to you, as this helps the support network needed, by you and them.If you feel you need any further help in dealing with this, there is no shame in doing so, allowing yurself to just be, remember all the good memories & also the not so good are all helpfull.Shutting away from any one emotion could be extemely painfull later & damaging, please allow your self to feel every emotion, as it is important to your own healing,and you deserve this healing too.Try not to ponder alone too much of the time ,as this can become a habit, one that is not too healthy, but time out for a while is a great healer. My suggestion to you (and I have to say JUST A SUGGESTION) is to allow your self every emotion without feeling guilt. Just Be!

Answer 2

Hi, I am sorry to hear about your loss. It is very difficult to go through the grieving process, but is it necessary and in time you will start to feel better. Remember what a great guy he was and take comfort in all the wonderful memories you have of your time together on this earth. Once you get past some of the pain, you will notice little things that will show you that he is with you in spirit. He is trying to reach out to you now, but you are too sad to notice. Pay attention, he is always around you. He says that you should listen for a song he loved because when it comes on, it is him letting you know he is okay and loves you very much. He also says that he uses the wind, like when it makes the door slam shut or makes the curtains flutter, to let you know he is around. Take care and God bless.

Answer 3

You may not want to hear this, but God has a job for him to do, his work on earth has been fulfilled, he made an impression, think of the memories he left you, Your life can be better, because you will know what he will expect of you. He is in a better place. Be strong, gather all his personal things and make a scrap book, this will be a beginning for you, when you are felling down, take out the book, you will cry and laugh, all the same time, only time will heal, your pain.He is at Peace.

Answer 4

When I lost my brother to a drowning incident, at all of 23 years, I thought I could find a way to block it all out and rationalize it, but I couldn't so I allowed my self to cry it out, and that is what I will advice, let the genuine tears fall for him, they are just tears of your love for him. And he would receive them where ever he is right now.

Cry, till you are light enough to see the goodness of the life that he lived and not just the last few moments of his life, he left because that’s all the time he had.

Later I came to know that when you block your grief it slowly turn into simmering depression that lurks for years together, so don’t try to be strong, just be the best you can, each day that it as it comes. Gradually start celebrating the person he was, the life he led, celebrate his life and not just dwell on his end.

And then one day I got a sign that he is happy and well, so am I.

Answer 5

I know what you're feeling like (I had a similar situation). It seems like this was recent because you seem to be really torn up about it. As time goes on it will be easier to deal with but as for now don't try to block out memories of him. Many people do that and think it helps. Remember and think about all the good times you had with him and cry it out. But just know that he loves you and is watching over you. For all the major events you go through in life, he will be there in spirit. Believe in that and you'll be fine.

My condolences and good luck.

Answer 6

Very sorry for your lose. Nothing but time can make you feel better. Everyone morns in different ways. Just know that he loved you as much as you loved him and remember all the good times you shared together. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 7

I am sorry. Loss of loved ones is terrible.But you have got to live - The show must go on.Life will not be same and do not think time will heal wounds - take it from me it does not.
Remember all hos ejoyable moments you passed together.Do something to cherish his memory.Live you must - either crying or smiling , so why not smile.9 weep and you will wep alone ) your other friends will be fed up soon and you will be left alone.Soi strat looking for another friend.

Answer 8

Contact the Barr-Harris Loss Center at the Chicago Institute for Psychoanalysis. They have a website. They may be able to help you themselves or suggest resources in your area.

Sorry for your loss.

Answer 9

OMG..i'm at a lack of words!!! i'm so so so sorry. He gave the impression of a staggering guy whos existence were given decrease way tooooo short. i'm not particular of music yet i supply you an obituary that i stated at my mom's funeral even as she died very sudenly at purely sixty 4 years old particularly a lot 2 years in the past. i became retaining my newborn son as i became examining it as he became born only 5 days after her lack of existence. each and absolutely everyone loved it!! be happy to edit the words for your liking. wish this poem facilitates....there is not something i am going to do to make him come again. There aren't any words to interchange the words you lengthy to take heed to. There aren't any solutions i am going to offer which will fulfill your questions. there is not yet another soul i am going to ever intoduce you to which will ever replace his and there is not any love i am going to provide you which will ever replace the love you shared. i'm unable to vow your damaged heart will ever be finished. i won't be able to say it would want to were worse. i won't be able to deny it turned right into a tradegy and that i won't be able to lie and inform you he will come again. He by no ability particularly left! I do promise you he hears you once you talk. i am going to assert he loves you no count number the area. i won't be able to deny he's in a more beneficial effectual position and that i won't be able to lie; he's waiting to greet you sometime. he's each and every step you're taking. he's in each and every little thing you do, he's the air you breathe and he's each and every beat of your heart. "he's like the wind. you won't be able to see him....yet you'll continually experience him". after I come to the top of the line and the solar has set for me. i choose no rites in a gloom-filled room. Why cry for a soul set loose? omit me a touch-yet not too lengthy and by no ability which includes your head bowed low. Remeber the love that we once shared. omit me, yet enable me flow! For it truly is a experience all of us ought to take and each and every ought to flow on my own. it truly is all area of the masters plan, a step on the line to abode. once you're lonely and ill of heart, flow to the acquaintances all of us recognize. submit for your sorrow in solid deads..omit me, yet enable me flow!!

Answer 10

Wow that's awful. Maybe you should go to a counsellor or something.