8 Yr. old son CONSTANTLY asking if he is going to be OK. What is happening to him? What do I do?

Question

My son is 8 yrs. old, and for the last few weeks, he has been freaking out. He is CONSTANTLY asking if he is going to be OK. When I say constantly I mean every few minutes. Sometimes every few seconds. He needs my CONSTANT reassurance that he is not going to get ill. He also tells me that he is scared and starts to cry. WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT DO I DO?????

Answer 1

First of all has anyone in your family has been ill or died. Talk to him when he ask the question, ask him why do you feel this way, has anyone told you that you will be ill if you don't do something. I would say that, yes, there is a problem there. Keep reassuring him and if that does not work get professional help. You have to do something at this stage of his little life, because if you let it go when he becomes a teen and hormones start making feel weird other problems will derive from it. ACT NOW....MOM. You are a good Mom by trying to get answers to your son's problem.

Answer 2

What movies did he watch lately? What cartoons that may have had that theme? You need to ask him why he keeps thinking that he's going to get sick. Then explain to him that things will be alright, that the chances are so slim it's not worth worrying about, and if he does get sick that he WILL recover, it will just be a small sick. Maybe there is someone that he knows that is germaphobic and he is picking up on it. Just be firm and positive that everything will be fine. That everyone gets sick and they all recover.

Maybe, if he isn't totally assured by you, have your pediatrician talk to him about germs and sickness. He may take the word of a professional.

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What ever you do, DO NOT put the poor child on medication. For one, his brain is still growing. Besides that, these pills are dangerous. They can make the anxieties worse in 2 ways, they can increase the anxiety and they also do not let the person deal with the issues. The answer is inside the the person, not a little pill.

Answer 3

You are right. It sounds like he just wants to struggle with you. Don't let these episodes be successful "struggles". Difficult as it may be, try to take on a nonchalant attitude whenever you can. Ignore anything you find trivial or can overlook & he might get frustrated enough to stop trying. There will definitely be issues that will surely need a firm hand. Issues that you will not tolerate him being stubborn. For these issues, you can first try persuading in a nice way. If he doesn't comply, tell him that he is making life difficult for you. Since that is the case, you will make life difficult for him too. You are giving him a chance to back down by saying so. If he still doesn't comply, exact a punishment that he would not enjoy at all & stick to your guns about it. Also, speaking to him softly & sternly is more effective than yelling. Take heart & good luck!

Answer 4

My daughter went through this stage in spades, in her case it is an anxiety disorder probably caused by a tendency to produce much too much adrenaline. If it's the same thing it's inherited, I did all the tests and my adrenals pump out twice as much as they are supposed to day in and out. It not your fault for the way he's been raised or any environmental factors. I expect blame will feature largely in the answers that you get. My daughter has gradually become much better to the point now of slightly high strung normality at 14 but we went through a crisis of panic attacks that were so bad by 9 she spent some nights in hospital. It helps when you know it's not your fault, some things you just have to accept suffering through. Remember the old adage, suffering builds character!

Answer 5

He has done something alone or with someone else that he has been told will hurt him in some way. Since he seems to be unwilling to tell you what that is, it is probably something you have repeatedly told him will cause him harm, and now he is in a dilemma: if he tells you, you may confirm that he is going to hell or going to die, or whatever; if he doesn't tell you, he can never confirm whether or not he's in trouble.

Do not try to tell him it's OK to tell you what's wrong. He'll assume you're trying to trick him. If there is a friend or family member he trusts (and who is not likely to be the source of the problem if there is one), see if that person can try to ease your son's fear, but not pump him for information or ask leading questions (like, "you can tell me if somebody has touched your penis.").

Above all, do NOT ask him a bunch of questions or tell him, "It's OK, you can tell me." Kids will make up answers, even accuse others of sexual molestation, just because they think that will end the interrogation. Do not put ideas in his head; let him get to the point where he feels he can talk about it.

Answer 6

I am not sure where most of these people got their answers from but I have a much different answer. I wouldn't worry about it. I know that is hard to do. Do you feel like you pay enough attention to him? Do you spend quality time with him? Sometimes this is what 8 year old boys do. He may be seeking attention because he feels neglected. Don't take this too personally. Just be honest with yourself. Good Luck.

Answer 7

okay, this may seem weird to you....but try to stay open minded.
If there is a pass life, then maybe for some reason he is recalling his past life and maybe he died young in his past life.I'm not say that's what it is, but it's just something to throw out there.
Most definitely you need to sit down with just him and without any interruptions and you need to ask him, Why do you think something is going to happen to you? Do you think that you are going to get ill? Did you have a bad dream about dying? Did someone tell you something that scared you? Try to find out where this is coming from.
I don't know why but i use to feel like i was going to die young when i was younger, i would pray to GOD and i would ask that he take care of me and i would tell the Lord that i wasn't ready to go. I really don't know why i felt that way, my family life was fine and i was happy, but i had the same worries.
I would most definitely talk with him and go from there.

Answer 8

Something has tramatized your son and you need to talk to him and try to find out what it is. It could be something you never thought of. My young daughter did something similiar. We got rid of our cat b/c she refused to use her litter box. Once she **** on my bed while I was under the covers. We told the kids why we had to get rid of her. That was the first part of it. Later on we watched a movie "The Milk Carton" You may remember that movie. It is true story about a girl that switched at birth. Later on she found her birth parents. She was forced to live with her birth parents but she missed the ones that raised her.....so she went back to live with them. The mother drove her back ....anyhow we watched that movie and some how in my daughters mind she thought they were getting rid of the girl. So, that is about the time she was acting freaky. I thought I would have to take her to a Pshce Doc. Anyhow, she was saying stuff like please don't send me away....I don't want new parents.....and she acting very afraid. When I sat down and actually spoke with her I learned that these two experiences led her to believe that we get rid of our loved ones when they are bad. =( I felt so terrible! I reassured her that I would love her forever not matter what she ever did and no matter what. happens... I also told her a lie about the cat at that time. I told her that the cat missed her mommy so we sent her back to be with her mommy. It worked like a charm! She never meantioned it again. So, maybe your 8 year old saw something on TV. Get to the bottom of it. If you can't the see their Pediatrician and ask for a referral.

Answer 9

If it started suddenly, he was probably traumatized by something. Try to get him to talk about when the behavior started with a whole lot of reassurance that he is loved and safe. I'd also consider taking him to a child therapist. Typically, they're not quick to suggest medication for someone so young, so please don't associate professional help with drugs. A professional may be able to help both you and him understand what triggered his fears and how to cope with it. Personally, I wouldn't delay too long. Your son sounds like he's in a lot of distress.

Answer 10

Of course, you need to get to the source of this question...He might have seen something on television, or someone might have said something at school, or he may have even heard you talking to someone on the phone and misunderstood what was said...But be patient and just get him to tell you why he is asking..and assure him you can be trusted as to where he heard the information, and that he will not get in trouble if he tells you...Once you have achieved that, then you can tell him that God is always watching out for him, and Jesus won't let anything happen to him...