Jokes for you.........?

Question

Hi, I have put some jokes and other stuff on my personal website. Check it out and give me some Feedback from the Feedback link on my website.

http://www.geocities.com/johncena_yo23/


If you have not noticed, the link is a Geocities website. It is not and cannot be a virus.


For the time being here is a joke.

St. Peter is leafing through the Big Book to see if the guy is worthy of entering. After several minutes, St. Peter closes the book, furrows his brow, and says, 'I don't really see that you ever really did anything great in your life, but I don't see anything really bad either.'

'Tell you what,' St. Peter says. 'If you can tell me of one REALLY good deed you did in your life, I'll let you in.'

The guy thinks for a moment and says, 'OK, well there was this one time when I was driving down the highway and I saw a gang assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down, and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of them torturing this woman. Infuriated, I got out my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and walked straight up to the leader of the gang. He was a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the gang members formed a circle around me.

'So, I ripped the leader's chain out of his face and smashed him over the head with the tire iron,' the guy says. 'Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, 'Leave this poor, innocent girl alone! You're all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I really teach you all a lesson in pain!'

St. Peter, duly impressed, says 'Wow! When did this happen?'

'Just a couple of minutes ago.'

★☺♠♫♂♣♩☼♪♥♀♬♦☻☆ sorry for the inconvienience it caused you. When too many people visit the page at once it gives that error. Try visiting it later.

Answer 1

he he he thats totally wat i would do i mean tell that to St. Peter

Answer 2

well 1. i get this message when i try to visit your page

"Sorry, this GeoCities site is currently unavailable.
The GeoCities web site you were trying to view has temporarily exceeded its data transfer limit. Please try again later.

Are you the site owner? Avoid service interruptions in the future by increasing your data transfer limit! Find out how.

Learn more about data transfer."

and also funny joke :) ♥

Answer 3

The joke wasn't very funny. Sorry dude. Not to be picky or anything but are you suppose to be advertising your own site here? I thought this was questions and answers?

Answer 4

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself 'She'll never go for me carrying on like that,' so he made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans, and shortly after that they got married.
A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her he would be late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. Since he still had several miles to walk he figured he could walk off any ill affects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before leaving had three extra large helpings of baked beans. All the way home he farted. He 'putted' down one hill and 'putt-putted' up the next. By the time he arrived home he felt reasonably safe.

His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, 'Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!' She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table and made him promise not to peek. At this point he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as she was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made him promise not to peek until she returned, and she went to answer the phone.

While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but *ripe* as a rotten egg.

He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised his leg and 'rrriiiipppp!' It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would dissipate. Things had just about returned to normal when he felt another urge coming. He shifted his weight to his other leg and let go. This was a real blue ribbon winner; the windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook and a minute later the flowers on the table were dead. While keeping an ear tuned in on the conversation in the hallway, and keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the next ten minutes, farting and fanning them each time with his napkin.

When he heard the 'phone farewells' (indicating the end of his loneliness and freedom) he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner. After assuring her he had not, she removed the blindfold and yelled, 'Surprise!'

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

Answer 5

I didn't even complete the first line of the joke you provided and became saturated by boredom and depression.
You should leave jokes for comedians or someone with a natural talent.
You suck! hated it! No snaps and no circle.

Answer 6

And you categorise this para as a Joke, which is a joke itself.

Answer 7

not bad, but here's a better one:
what has two legs and is constantly bleeding?




-Half a dog

Answer 8

gr8

Answer 9

lol, great joke

Answer 10

sorry its tooooooooooooooooooo big...........cant read ...give some small one............