Ppl tell me that i am a very nice girl, attractive, easy going, strong...Many men have told me that they would be with me without thinking too much about it, coz i am really rare heart to find....
I am in love with this man, he is 40ish and i am close to 30 and he knows me better than my own family but he doesnt commit to me.....To my understanding there is no obvious reason to hold him back, and it really doesnt make sense....I am in love with him and i want him more than anything and i know he feels for me too....He is not the person who will speak out loud about his feelings..........The guy is not married.....FOR A FACT... Dont know what to think anymore....If someone out there really has good ideas of what is going on, PLS enlighten me!!!!!
2006-08-19 21:53:33 · 14 answers · asked by thnos 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Firstly, you have to know that age is just a number and the fact that he is older than you shouldn't bother you. Besides, your partner should be older than you to enhance respect in your relationship. A friend of mine once told me that women mature faster than men, that is to say that you are either higher or close to him psychologycally.
Secondly, you have to ask him what he wants from you. You have to be bold and take extra miles coz there is no harm in trying. I think it would be a lot better to know what he feels for you than to contine to hope in wat might not be true or live with doubt.
Since, he can speak his feelings, I think he is emotionally soft and might be scared of losing u.
the solution is for you to start up a conversation with him about this issue. Be sincere with him and ask him to be too. Good luck.
2006-08-19 22:55:53 · answer #1 · answered by genipabu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if the man can come to the food store for free, and he doesn't have to work for the food, then way does he have to commit to someone that is giving him everything he wants. Men are not that foolish. If he is wanting you and you are there for him every minute when he wants you. There is no commitment on his part, why would you think he would want to commit. He is having a free ride.
I know.... I understand him completely ... I was getting a free ride from my girlfriend for over 6 years. It was great. I loved her but I never wanted to be married to her as I didn't need to be. I got every thing I needed from her for over 6 years. Then one day she came in and told me.. that she was completely thinking of her life for the future. She couldn't see me and her floating in the abyss forever. She made the decision that she loved me very much but she needed more out of our relationship and she left. I figured that was that... but I also found out that i could not live without her. One year later we were married. I was without her for three months. It showed me that i really loved her and I really wanted her back and i wanted to commit to her.
It is up to you. Either accept your life as not changing. Live iwth him the way it is.... he has no reason to change. Or change your life and make a decission. It is up to you. It is your life. Good Luck
2006-08-19 22:08:58 · answer #2 · answered by NIck N 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know what you are thinking. Ask questions and let him talk. Many couples know if they want to get married within 2 years of a relationship. If he doesn't want to get married and have kids and you do then you should reconsider the relationship. You don't know if you have 70 years or 7 days to live. You should find out what your relationship means to him today. You will sleep much better.
2006-08-19 22:02:48 · answer #3 · answered by The Voice of Reason 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps he don't want to drag you in as he feels he's too old for you or maybe he still don't feel like committed yet? Well, some guys don't want to get committed for the rest of their life and i don't really understand why...
Perhaps they think they can get better gals with spending their money out there, they are contented and satisfy...
2006-08-19 22:02:35 · answer #4 · answered by barelyahrie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he is so mature, why don't you just tell him how you feel. If he rejects you, bachelor-ism is what he wants and you need to move on, but if he doesn't then, well, you can fill in the blanks. Either way, yo will know for sure and can get on with yourself with or without him.
2006-08-19 22:13:44 · answer #5 · answered by bratchild 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you are mature enough to understand each other. If he is the shy type, Just tell him your feeling about him. You might just start a relationship from there. All the best is what I wish U.
2006-08-19 22:02:26 · answer #6 · answered by freeall_freeme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 40, if you're not married or settling down, or even thinking about it, you're a lost cause. Be careful, you may be dealing with a person who wants to be a bachelor for the rest of his life.
2006-08-19 21:59:15 · answer #7 · answered by Private Account 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u 'know' he feels for u too? are u sure? he said that to you? or u just try to reassure urself?i think a man only commit to girls he think he wants to commit with. ask him what he really feels for u.
on a second thought... no, don't ask him. if he really love u, he will make the first move. he will ask u to marry him.
but honestly, i think he doesnt interested to commit. you can wait for him to grow up. if u dont want to, walk in the opposite direction. no...run!
2006-08-19 22:06:32 · answer #8 · answered by miza n 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do a couple of small things to see if he noticed like go shopping
*buy a new out fit
* change your perfume
*do something different to your hair just to see if he is realy taking notice of you just try it once sit down with him and talk to him tell him how you really feel dont bottle it up inside because i no how it feels and i couldnt eat for a week because everything was just running through my head and i didnt no how to let it out so you really have to think about what you are going to say but say what you feel PLEASE tell him how you feel for me best of luck and if you need someone to talk to just reply to me
2006-08-19 22:39:23 · answer #9 · answered by becc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
single at that age, he is not going to commit to anyone it looks like, either you got to be ok with that fact, or move on...if you want commitment look elsewhere, he would have done something by now if he was going to...he may 2 others in your same position, he may be just using you...
2006-08-19 22:00:20 · answer #10 · answered by wizzard 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋