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he works hard from 420am till the late afternoon. is it fair to ask him to watch the kids when I know he's falling asleep. I work part-time too and he watches them when I work.Grandparents are hundreds of miles away

2006-08-19 19:35:50 · 16 answers · asked by elizabeth m 2 in Family & Relationships Family

16 answers

You must do everything for yourself, husband and baby - because you know he works very hard for you two as well. Try to be a wife - not a partner! Good Luck

2006-08-19 19:42:32 · answer #1 · answered by OPTIMIST 2 · 2 3

4:20, huh?

Well, don't give him a choice. I hate to say it like that but they are half his children. I just hate it when some men say they "help" with the kids sometimes. Help? They're half his. It's half his job, not just 10% his job.Even if you didn't work outside the home, you'd still need a break and some mommy time. I'd suggest having a heart to heart talk with him and explain that you know he works hard but for your sanity's sake, you need him to help more w/ the kids. Of course, he also works outside the home full time and he needs his down time too. It wouldn't be fair to ask him to look after them all the time he's home but I don't think that's what you're expecting.

See if you guys can work out a schedule like the 1st & 3rd Tuesday of each month he gets to go out w/ the guys and the 2nd & 4th Tuesday he watches the kids so you can have a girls night out or some alone time. Make sure you factor is some special couple time just for the two of you, also.

If talking to him doesn't work (because some men just don't have any sympathy for moms & all they do), this is where you don't give him a choice...go lock yourself in the bathroom!
I am totally serious! If you need time alone & he wont' take care of the baby, run to the bathroom & lock the door. Tell him you have severe diarrhea, or menstral cramps, or whatever and do NOT open that door for an hour!
Soak in the tub, have a romance novel hidden in there to read, paint your toes, write a letter, do whatever you want. No man is going to refuse to take care of his crying baby when he thinks his girl is on the toilet with diarrhea. And I promise he won't come knocking on the door to try to get you either. If he does, just moan & say your stomach is killing you & you hope you don't have to go to the hospital! After you do this a few times, he'll have a lot of good practice taking care of the kid & doing more around the house.
Get your alone time however you must!
But seriosly, I'd try talking to him first. He just might surprise you!

2006-08-19 19:57:28 · answer #2 · answered by Girl named Sue 4 · 1 0

If you husband works those long hours, surely he gets some time off? You need to work out a schedule for you and your husband that includes alone time for you and a date-night for the two of you.

He must take some time with the children... he is their father. But it will take scheduling. Is there a mom's club in your area (see link below)? Most chapters have date nights for couples with organized baby sitting or they have babysitting tickets you can either purchase or coop into (you watch 3 or 4 kids one night and you get a few other nights out when the other parents watch your kids). It's a nice alternative to paying a babysitter.

Scheduling is needed... and watch Supernanny... she has great solutions too.

Good luck!

2006-08-19 19:44:12 · answer #3 · answered by Rogue Scrapbooker 6 · 0 0

If you are asking you already know how you feel about this. You need to think about the babies well being also. If he is going to be tired and likely to fall asleep, I would not ask him to watch the baby. Anything could happen to your child. If you have things you
need to do consider hiring a sitter. If it is a very young, newborn,
you should keep your child in a crib when you do things that puts you out of sight (fixing meals, showering, getting mail).
Try to talk with your husband. I'm sure the 2 of you can come to
an arrangement that will keep your marrige happy and your baby safe.

2006-08-19 19:50:59 · answer #4 · answered by chrissm2001 3 · 0 0

Yes it is fair because they are also his children!
If you gave up work, would he have to work longer hours to pay the bills?

You say your husband works hard and, by the sounds of it keeps unsociable hours but he gets to finish work at the end of the day! You don't. You wake up, you go to work, you come home and you start your other job at home which in most cases is more demanding and stressful than any paid job on this planet!

If your husband has been complaining then maybe you could reach a compromise so that everyone wins.

Unfortunately your details are a little vague so it is hard to help you reach one without having days, times you work etc.

Talk to your husband and I wish you luck.

2006-08-19 19:47:16 · answer #5 · answered by Gillipoos 5 · 0 0

did you know that being a full time mother is harder than doing a regular full time job? Not only that, but you also work part time. There's nothing wrong with asking him to watch the kids some times, specially since they're his kids too! If he doesnt believe that watching the kids is as hard as his job, then try an experiment. switch for a while. tell him to stay home and you go to work full time. see what happens. he'll probably beg u to change back. lol

2006-08-19 19:49:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

Your husband works long hours and takes care of the kids while you work part-time? What else do you want him to do?

2006-08-23 05:57:36 · answer #7 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0 0

Let him have a little nap when he gets home, then when he wakes up, go out alone for a while to walk thru some shops or just a short drive for a bit of a break.

2006-08-19 19:52:34 · answer #8 · answered by chris 5 · 0 0

depends on the situation, if he works at a job that sleep dep could be be hazardous to his health let him sleep. children are full time and especially when there small they need there mama a lot, but there are the times he needs to step in because he's there and help relieve you, you didn't make that baby alone

2006-08-19 19:52:21 · answer #9 · answered by demilitia66 2 · 0 0

Whats wrong with asking a father to watch his children for awhile. I realize he works hard but if your not wealthy and cant afford help with children you have to take care of your own.

2006-08-19 19:42:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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2016-11-26 19:26:14 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

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