Mothers only?

Question

I have three children 7,6 and 2 months.I was wondering is it terrible to sleep during the day.On the weekends my husband works 40 hours straight thru.So he leaves at 8am Sat.,and does not come home until Sun.at 12am.I have no transportation,we only have one car.The baby keeps me up during the night,plus the night is my time to relax ,and do whatever I want.I usually set cereal out for the kids the night before,cause they can manage by themselves.I wake up on and off,and talk to them also taking care of the baby when he wakes.The kids usually play games in my room on the tv or lay with me plus help me with the baby.I just feel bad sometimes,but I get depressed and worn out more easily if I dont get my sleep or my time.What do you think?

I am talking about weekends.I am all by myself on weekends,and the kids and me really cannot leave the house to go anywhere.We play outside sometimes.I just get worn out easily on the weekends,I have no help with the kids,and I also try to get my time in to enjoy.As far as kids taking naps,they won't.I wake up and take care of the baby,and things.The kids help feed him or I might let them change a diaper but usually I don't I get pee on if I let them lol.

Answer 1

Sleeping most of the time is probably not a good thing, but you need to keep your sanity and
have some time to yourself. Try to limit your relaxation time to
a minimum at night. Maybe stay up after the kids go to bed for
a few hours and then only get up when the 2 month old needs
attention. Then durring the day sleep when the 2 month old sleeps. Like you said let the kids watch tv and play in your room or
sleep in their room or living room etc. When the 2 month old is awake though try and focus all your attention on as much group
activities again so they don't feel (the 7 and 6 year old) like their not getting enough attention. Try and plan a few things to do, a board game or puzzles or coloring or even a walk outside if it is nice. This will pass the time. I don't see it a problem if it is just on the weekends. You just have to be aware of what is happening
so noone gets hurt. You don't have to spend every minute keeping
the kids entertained and educating them. It seems like society pressures us into being that kind of super mom that is supposed
to be teaching their kids 24/7 and not letting them watch tv or
play video games because they don't want their kids to be couch
potatoes but kids need down time also and some tv is actually
educational and entertaining. I think the most important thing is that you take care of them and that you take care of yourself.
Show them their loved but also let them know that you need your
rest too while daddy is gone. Don't let society pressure you into
thinking your a bad parent because you are not playing with them
24/7. They have to learn to be somewhat independent also. It
is ok to get some rest. I have a 2 year old and sometimes I watch
a movie in one room while she watches a movie in her room.
I have friends that would never think of doing that but I need my time for my sanity and that is how I relax. I don't feel it is wrong
because she enjoys it for a while and so do I. We do plenty of things together. I don't have to entertain her all the time. She has
her own toys and imagination and it is a good way for her to wind down. I would be depressed too if I didn't have that little bit of
relaxation time. You do what you have to to get by. Raising kids
isn't easy. It is a sacrifice that is worth every minute, but you
don't have to give up your life entirely for theirs.

Answer 2

I guess you can look at it both ways. You do need your time and that probably keeps you sain but, a lot can happen while you're sleeping. I would be really afraid that they would get into something they shouldn't, set fire to the house, or go wondering the neighborhood and you not know about it. I would also be afraid that they would hurt the baby. A six year old and a seven year old can't really take care of a baby. I have been in your shoes having a child who won't sleep and being up all night. It's tough. I would try and get the kids to take an afternoon nap or something so that you can all sleep at the same time or you get your Mommy time then.

Answer 3

You know, I used to wonder the same thing, until I took a psychology class in college. There is something called your circadian rhythm, and it is off for you right now. I understand that you being a mother with a new baby is hard (I remember it quite well!) and sleep is rare for a full night. What I did was about the same thing as you. Unfortunately, nothing will change your circadian rhythm but you. It's like having jet lag, it messes up the time when your "sleep clock" expects you to get up, or go to sleep. The most amt. of sleep anyone needs is 8 hrs, but a person can function just fine off of four, believe it or not.

As you say, you get depressed sometimes, and worn out more easily; you should speak to a professional about that. Our circadian rhythm can have something to do with this situation you are going through. If you want to try and remedy it yourself, try going without that much sleep for a day or so. Your body can replenish itself of sleep during a normal schedule.

Unless you're breast feeding the baby, and the little one wakes up at night for the feeding, you can convince a child to sleep through the night if you try. My daughter was waking up at night, until I would lay her back down after she would fuss in her crib, and calmly say, "Go to sleep honey, it's night time." Kids are easy that way - they will allow any schedule to take place if you plant the seed for long enough!

Answer 4

So, you're not talking about naps during the day, you're talking about using the day to sleep, and stay awake at night because it's more relaxing for you? Is this everyday, or just when your husband is gone? Or during the week your husband is home to watch them? It sounds a little selfish to me, but I'm not entirely clear on the details.

I think naps are ok, but I think 6 and 7 year olds need a little more supervision as well as interaction from their mother. I can understand your desire to have some "me" time, but I think you should find a better outlet if this is a daily ritual for you.

Answer 5

You will only be good for your children if you are alert. A mother has a built in sense when it comes to children. So along as you have the children in the room with you and the other two are old enough to not cause the baby harm, it is okay. Don't feel bad no matter how good of a mother you are, you are still human with certain limits.

Answer 6

first of all have your thyroid checked,then if thats o.k see if someone can take your baby for a few days and have them constantly try to keep her awake all day(let her sleep some)while she is away you need to decide how you can spend the days awake,make a planner and stick with it,while baby is getting her days straight,you can too,now is the time they value your time schedule nap time with your kids,so they sleep when you do,your olger kids will look forward to special mommy time,you could read to them just before nap time and set alarm only sleep for an hour or so,a suggestion to you might be contact preschool and see how there schedule works,they take naps as well.

Answer 7

a) you might want to have your blood iron level checked if you're needing to nap so much in the day

b) if the 7 and 6 year old can manage on their own then it's all good. .

c) if you're sleeping on the 2 month olds schedule and are up with them it's all good

d) you can't rely on the 7 and 6 year old to take care of a 2 month old

e) you need to seek professional help with the depression... it can be detrimental to you and your kids... http://www.counselingpros.com/. They can help you online and over the phone (since you stated you did not have transportation).

I've been where you are and it's not a good place... please contact them.

Answer 8

organic mom - i had to confirm my son, there became no want for him to be followed as i became in a difficulty the position i might want to have the funds for to improve him (operating) yet no matter if I hadn't i might want to were eligible for advantages and as we've the NHS i wouldn't have had to rigidity about medical or dental treatment as both are loose. how you could clarify it truly is an invisible amputation and it truly is gut wrenching. I genuinely have suffered with melancholy, been suicidal, self harmed, been indignant, hated myself, blamed myself felt ashamed. It took reunion to artwork by ability of each and every of the thoughts yet I nevertheless have my undesirable days and it truly is going to continually be a existence sentence.

Answer 9

don't worry about it. the kids are happy and being taken care of. In a few months the baby will be sleeping thru the night and this thing will be in the past.

Answer 10

Hire a babysitter-perhaps a teenager who wants to earn some pocket money to watch all the kids, even the baby. Yes, you need your rest but the kids need supervision also. Even good kids burn houses down and swallow poison when not supervised. It will be money well spent.