why did my dad leave me for nothing?

Question

when i was small my father left me so i never got to know him i also have 2 big brothers which i never got to see im 13 now and i want to know my brothers my dad hates me dont know why but i hate him for leaving me hes not in the uk and my brothers live with him and i want help WHY WOULD MY DAD LEAVE ME
HOW CAN I GET MY BROTHERS TO KNOW THAT I AM THERE BRO AND I LOVE THEM

Answer 1

I am so sorry that you are hurting like this. My father left me and my brother too and it was very painful. I thought that my father hated me too but I found out it wasn't because of me he left, it was because he had issues. It is not your fault that your father left it is his fault because abandoning a child is not the right thing to do under any circumstances and he is the one with the problem. I would ask your mother to try to get in contact with his relatives so you can locate him and your brothers. Here is a website that you can use to find people even if they live in other countries. I will pray that you find your family and you pray too so you can find your family. Good luck and take care.

Answer 2

you're quite arrogant if you think your dad specifically left you. You were a child and although you are blaming yourself, you are blaming the wrong pereson.

Your dad left your mom and you unfortunatly like a lot of kids got caught up in the bs.

He doesn't hate you, he hates the time in his life that you remind him of.

Write a hand written letter one to each of your brothers and to your dad. Include a picture of you in all three and write to them that although there may have been drama in the day, you would really like to get to know them. They are your family and you wish that you could be a part of their lives and they/yours.

Be sure not to repeat the words "I, me, my, mine, ect" because when people read letters that more or less written by a self-centered person, they will not fully learn what the message of the letter is, but be a bit put off by it.

My dad left my family when I was in Kindergarden. Peresonally, I have never missed him and don't even think about him. I am not angry, I just believe that my path was meant to be walked without him. He has his own issues that I do not resent him for. If it wasn't for him I would never have been born, so I can't be mad.

Don't hate your dad, because you do not know the cercumstances for which he left. Even though you may never learn why, you need to understand parents are people who have a right to live their lives too.

Sucks, but you cannot force someone to be a parent to you and it's ultimatly your decision on how much you let someone hurt you.

Answer 3

Raising children is a full-time job and some men (and some women, for that matter) just can't handle it. It is terrible for the kids and bad for society, but these things are an unfortunate side of human nature. My dad left when I was 10 and I had two younger brothers -- one was a newborn. My dad just couldn't handle the cost and constant demands of us kids. To be honest, it is very difficult to raise kids, but almost all parents understand that before they have children. It's an unfortunate thing but there are some people who just want to make babies but can't be bothered to raise them.

It is possible to grow up and be a productive adult without having a father. Tell yourself that you'll do better when it's your turn and work toward that goal.

Answer 4

I am sorry for the pain you feel because of the situation, My Mom left when I was only 6 yrs. I am now 51, and I still don't know her, I have met her twice in my 20's but my anger wouldn't allow for a relationship. You dad probably doesn't hate you, as I don't know the situation I can't really say for sure. But I found that the reasons my Mom had for abandoning us were legit. I have since forgiven her, and moved on, as for the brothers. write them. or try to call them.
once again not knowing the situation or their ages. You may have to wait until your all of age. good luck and try not to hate it will just drag you down.

Answer 5

my dad also left me when i was little. after my parents divorced he skipped out and i only saw him every few years just long enough for him to make some promises he couldn't keep and be on his way again. as a child this was painful and really damaged my self-esteem. but as an adult with children of my own i realize something, and the same thing is true for you...

it's not that he doesn't love you...
he doesn't love himself and therefore he can't show love to others appropriately. if he loved himself he would never rob himself of the joy of being in your life...
this is a choice that HE made. this involves his own internal issues and they have nothing to do with you. until he conquers his own demons he will not be capable of being a positive influence in your life....
it's not your fault. you were just a child. you didn't ask for any of this. it is a parent's responsibility to support their children despite obstacles...

as for his reasons, no one can say. he may have some deep-rooted issues and should probably seek counseling. but this is something he must do on his own.

in regard to your brothers, if you know how to contact them why don't you just get in touch with them and see if it would be possible to arrange a meeting. maybe your mother would be willing to help you with this. i have a sister that i've never met and my dad refuses to acknowledge her, but i've been thinking about going on Maury to find her... i'd like to know if we look alike :)

in closing, if this issue makes you feel bad about yourself then you may need to talk to someone who can help you sort through these feelings. maybe a minister or school counselor. i wish you the best in your quest... i know first hand how hard this is for you.

and most of all.... remember, it's not your fault.

Answer 6

how do you know your father hates you? when is the last time you spoke to him? I doubt your father left you but rather, left the situation he was in. Bitter feelings are often a part of a divorce and so many times, the kids get caught up in one side of it, not knowing the full truth. Talk to him, tell him you want to talk to your brothers.

Answer 7

Dont Worry About It. Just make sure you dont do it when you get married and get kids. End the cycle. Be successfull to whatever you do best. Then, be PROUD about yourself.

Answer 8

your dad doesnt hate you, he hates himself but cannot admit it. youre a great kid! ask your mom, or an adult you trust to help you get in touch with your brothers.

Answer 9

There is no way for me to understand this. I guess he is not worth looking for. He sounds like a man not of any substance. Find you a mentor, if you can.

Answer 10

It's ok he is not worth it if he left you... you should just try to find your brothers... They would probably love to meet you.