whats going on?

Question

why cant he just set a date? he has proposed, but we are poor at the moment, why cant we set a date for a couple of years?

Answer 1

if you thinking it will be in a couple of years, then why stress now about the date. rather enjoy each other . too much whining may just prevent him from following through. it's a big step and it's better to do it when both are ready. appreciate that he does not want to rush ,it's not a competition. if you are happy together that is all that counts.

Answer 2

Congratulations! You can set a date now, but who know what is going on 3 years down the road. I know that I am most likely getting married June, 2010, but there is no reason to set a date until we are 6 months to a year off because who knows if that date will work. Let's say you set the date now. You tell everyone and they set aside that date and you can't change it if some major conflict comes up. What if you get pregnant and that is your due date? What if that is the weekend your favorite band is playing in town? What if you have an unavoidable work conflict? I say to set the date no sooner than 9 months before. My good friend set her 4 years a head of time for 6 weeks after she graduated law school only to find her new employer wouldn't let her take time off. Another friend set her date a year in advance only to find her bf shipped off to war. Reset the date for a year and a half later and he shipped out 2 weeks before their wedding (boy were they happy that they had a JOP wedding a year before their first church wedding for insurance reasons). Waiting for a year won't hurt anyone.

Just remember: Man plans and God laughs.

Answer 3

Whats the point of setting a date now for 2 years ahead when you know you can't afford it yet. It will only put pressure on you both to meet the 'deadline'. Whay not wait a couple of years until you both know you can afford to get married and then set the date - you don't have to wait another 2 years and there will be no added pressure of money. If there are other reasons why he won't set a date you need to ask him and find out.

Answer 4

At least you're engaged! My man has the ring but still wont pop the question, and I'm pregnant! We know we're going to get married but things like where and when are undecided as there are many things in the way, like not having the money. If you both are saving towards the wedding, I wouldn't worry about him not setting the date. Maybe he's hoping it will be sooner than a couple of years, or maybe he's like me and has no idea what the next couple of years will bring. You could be living miles from where you are now?

Answer 5

Marriage is involves a lot of compromise. You have to work with your fiance and come to an agreement on the wedding date.

Maybe he wants to see what your financial status is first before setting a date. You have to talk about what kind of wedding you both want to have and come up with a budget goal to go for.

Wedding is a once in a lifetime thing (hopefully) so plan it carefully and don't rush it.

Answer 6

One thing that the two of you could consider is going ahead and getting married at the Justice of the Peace, and then later on you could have the whole wedding ceremony. If you do it this way you can live as husband and wife and have the ceremony when the time is right and you wont have to be rushed by it. Good Luck.

Answer 7

Hi maybe it would be better for you to set a date, because if you know you have to save up for it then you will make sure you do, but its is alot of planning and it also depends on what type of wedding you want to have. He probabley wants to wait till you have enough money, but there are other ways.

Answer 8

i went through the same thing i had three different dates and then had to keep canceling, if you take your time you can have a beautiful wedding for cheap money, wait until you get tax money back and just use that i planned mine in 8 weeks after finding how much we were getting back and did everything myself and everyone commented that it was beautiful. you don't need a photographer which will run you at least 2000.00. my sis in laws dad took pics with a good digital camera put them on CD and you can go to Walgreen's and make whatever you want, my hall was 300.00 dress 150.00 and bought centerpieces at an Xmas tree shop, fake flowers that came in Terra cotta pot and painted pots black (black white and pink wedding) dinner was 13.00 per person but there are ways to cut cost let me know if you need more advice i just got married in April and trust me we live pay check to pay check i wish you the best!!!!!!

Answer 9

Hey Terry Congrats on you engagement, hey setting a wedding date can wait a while, I think he wants to wait to see if your financial situation improves, which is not too bad. I was set to get married next year but do to financial issues we pushed it back to 2008 and that way when we do get married we are not going deeper in to debt for our wedding.

Answer 10

There is no reason why you cannot....but in a couple of years...it may change even if you do set one. Maybe he wants to wait until you guys know you can afford a wedding.