Me and this girl have been best friends for ages. We have traveled the world to see eachother and always have a great time together. We go to the movies. We do everything together. Her Parents love me. I have made every effort known to hummanity. If we were older I would ask her to marry me!! Let me add that we r both 18. I want to be able to support her before I decide to marry her She has had several crushes and the occasional bf but none last. I love her more than anything in the world but she doesn't seem to notice. She says she loves me as a brother but I cant live with that. When I'm with her there is nothing more wonderful. I rather endure anythng then have her suffer 4 1 sc. Im tired of being the friend. I make her laugh, smile, cry etc... but she never lets me in her heart. This girl is the joy of my life but to her i am only a "friend". I've tried telling her but to no avail. Am i selfish to want more? What can i do? Am i being used? Any advice would help. Thx:)
2006-08-19 07:32:15 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Aww... that is so sweet. You need to tell her that you love her and all the stuff you just told us. If she isnt making the move, do it for her. You are not being selfish, I think it is she who is being selfish. Try treating her more than a friend. Good luck and I hope everything works out. She is a lucky girl to have someone care for her like that. =]
2006-08-19 07:41:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have sort of grown up together, huh? In history class (back in high school-eons ago) I learned that arranged marriages in China often backfired because the young girl was sent to live with her intended. The idea was the mother would teach the girl how to serve and be a good wife to her future husband. The problem was when the girls grew up they thought of the boys as a brother. I said all that to say this:
That this girl's parents like you is of little consequence concerning her feelings for you. She has made it clear that she appreciates you as a friend. You are young. Retain your friendship with this young lady and her family, but find a g/f that can see you as more than a brother. To quote the Rolling Stones:
"You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need!" I'm pretty sure that what you definitely don't need is more rejection from this girl.
2006-08-19 07:48:16 · answer #2 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You feel that you are ready for a serious commitment at a rather young age. You both have so much of life to experience yet. She is simply not ready, and your ardour may end up driving a wedge between your friendship.
Right now she has only good memories about you, and you want to keep it that way.
Sometimes patience is the hardest thing to practice. And granted, she will very probably end up with someone else. But, if that does not work out, she will have a bit of experience in "what she does not want", then and it will be a bit easier to appreciate what you have to offer.
Right now, is not the time for you to tie yourself into a relationship. As you have indicated, you are aware that you need to create a career in which you will be able to support a family of your own. There are things that you need to do before taking on such a large responsibility.
Enjoy what the two of you have right now. Go on with what you have to do to be successful. Who knows, when the two of you have experienced more of life, it will be the "right time".
2006-08-19 07:45:14 · answer #3 · answered by diane_b_33594 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you are a g/f, she likes the feelings she get from being around you but you feel like a g/f to her. unless she is lesbian, you don't have a chance. she is using you for the feelings she gets from being around you,.try taking those feelings away from her , starve her for them in other words and you will get the same reaction you would get if you were a g/f, she will just find another g/f. she may agonize over it for a while but you would be forgotten. you started things off badly from the beginning and now you will suffer for it. I'm not trying to make you feel bad here by saying you are a g/f, but just think of what a g/f would mean to her and realize that is what you have made of the situation. now think of what a b/f would mean to her an act accordingly. make a gradual change that won't be noticed as coersion. too much too soon will be spotted and you will lose. it took time to get in the mess you are in, if it can be turned around it will take time, you are only 18 , you have plenty of time.
2006-08-19 07:52:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you have done too many things together. You don't need to do everything .... you need to do romantic things together.....you need to see romantic movies, go in romantic places, meet at romantic hours....
Do not be a brother to her...A brother tells you about his girlfriend, about how sick he is after he drinks, or he has stomach problems and can't go out, and also is listening to you when you have the same problems.....So don't do that.....
Let her know that you are a man .... one that she can count on, one that would protect her, ...but also one that is attractive, sexy, appealing, romantic.....
If she doesn't see that......I guess you should accept that this is just one of those times when just one of the two persons falls in love.....It happens to everyone.
2006-08-19 07:47:17 · answer #5 · answered by Delfina 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
this story is so sweet and so said i amso sorry that this girl dosen't notice you but maybe she's scared if you both enter into a relationship together that it will ruin your frriendship. but it maybe possible that you just need to remain freinds and find someone that will love you and be happy to share and to have some one that cares as much as you do.you need to give your self to a chance to find love that will be true and someone that will want return that love as well.. you can remain freinds but don't waste your life there are other people out ther that would be happy to spend ther life with you i hope that this helps good luck
2006-08-19 08:32:47 · answer #6 · answered by aloinnc 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let me tell you a little secret
you like her alot she doesn't like you as much-
She likes you alot but you don't like her as much.
thats how live is bro. Dont be so available and dont be so nice and dont show her so much attention
Do this tell her you like another girl and see what she does if she likes you even a little she will pause in the convo alot or she will act different like calling you alot or coming over or talking about you alot. Thats a great way to know if your friend like you even a little if you say "I am interested in aasking this girl or guy out" or something like that
2006-08-19 07:37:51 · answer #7 · answered by LaToya J 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the saddest thing is to love someone that dont love you back. i have been there, it dont make you selfish, we cant help how we feel. just try to move on, maybe if she sees you with another girl it will make her open her eyes and see what she is missing out on. im sure you can find a nice girl, girls love guys like you. good luck. if u wanna email me u can, i will talk with ya. bethanysmom20@yahoo.com
2006-08-19 07:41:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
you're not only her "friend". you're her brother, in the truest sense of the word. she trusts you, and loves you, and respects you. if you would do anything for her, then be patient for her. she might come around, maybe. but she might not. you'll have to be happy with her in the capacity that you have her.
2006-08-19 07:40:12 · answer #9 · answered by entropicflux 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's obvious u really love this girl, and she loves you too. maybe she is scared to tell u how she really feels. u need to tell her your true feelings and stop trying to make her read between the lines.
2006-08-19 07:42:47 · answer #10 · answered by rogue 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋