what the best way a mom and her daugther to get along?

Question

help me with my problem

Answer 1

Move away from each other. J/K; well, sort of. I'm going to assume you're the daughter and you're too young to move out of your mother's home, so with that said I think they best way to get along is to be respectful of your mother--it is afterall her house you're living in.

Whether you agree with her or not, isn't important at this stage in your life; she's looking out for you and does love you, whether she explicity states it or not. When you get older, you will realize why she said and did what she is saying and doing--and will appreciate her for doing so.

For now, as others mentioned, try to do activities together. Seriously, my mom and I did go shopping together most Saturday afternoons which led to dinners out and she shared with me many stories of when she grew up, her family, her courtship with my dad, etc. Neither one of my sisters knew any of this stuff until I told them. This was back when I was in high school and college.

My mother and I had a few rough years (a couple times she wanted to throw me out of the house), but we were always able to work through it. I was always mindful that she loved me and was saying those things, not because she really wanted me out of the house or to hurt me, but because she had external stresses that she couldn't handle and was taking them out on me. (I'm the youngest, and stayed in the family house the longest.) As hard as it will be, try to look at it in that point of view; look at what's going on in her life right now--is she stressed at work? Is someone in her family or close to her in trouble or really sick?

Try looking for these external cues; then maybe you guys and talk through them and realize what the misunderstanding is really about and hopefully start to get along. BTW, this works just as well if you're the mom in the position.

Answer 2

The best advice is "Remember". You don't say what age you're dealing with, but to get through any of them, there has to be a common denominator to hold you through the many changes ahead while remaining sane in Self...so two needs...getting a grip on your own spirituality...your intuition...your "Mom/Goddessness...let go of your steadfastness to experience new things (Mom's have a tendency to hold routine, order, & control in high priority)...you have to, though, because you love your daughter & she's about to let go...her body, mind, & spirit are in "get balanced" mode with urgency...she needs widsom, she wants understanding, she has a million Why?s and will seek everywhere for answers, all while dealing with her physicalities (body changes, emotional changes), as well as a need to trust her intuitions without further consequence then from herself.

Ergo, numero dos...Simply supply the tools--the knowledge--or way to it, the integrity,and the undonditional love, at any given time of life, that you have the ability to, that will make her next pathway one of wiser choices...you will be grateful for the strong, free-spirit thinker you set loose on the world...your efforts in any aspect will be rewarded beyond measure...

Good Journey, Mamasita!!!

Answer 3

By having mutual respect,a mother that doesn't have respect for her daughter and treats her as somehow inferior and ignorant cant have a good relationship with her daughter.By the same token ,the daughter must show respect to get respect.
You must above all listen to each other with an open mind,talk to them about what they like and why,keep an open mind about music and currant trends,you don't have to like them to listen.when my daughter was in 6th grade she loved Ozzy,I couldn't understand why ,so one day she said Mom have you ever really listened to his music? I had not so I sat with her through 3 hours of Ozzy,Red Hot Chili Peppers,Wasp,etc and came away not only more understanding but a fan to this day of Ozzy and Chili Peppers,so you never know until you open your mind.I can impress the art of communication more ,learn to see your daughter and mom the way others see them not only with your own limited views....by the way my daughter is now 32 and a fine woman that I am very proud to call my daughter and my friend.

Answer 4

in my family we always had 2 be home 4 dinner. my mom didnt give a hoot where we were or doing we had 2 be home 4 dinner --and talk about what was going on in our lives and our goals. not going 2 lie 2 u i hated it but looking back now it made our family close.
dont know how old ur daughter so limited on how to suggest. u can join a group, book club, get your nails done or go to the spa together. once or twice a month meet for lunch at ur favorite restaurant and etc. i put my page link below if u want 2 chat. also some links that i thought might be interesting. i hope i helped and good luck!

Answer 5

I'm 25 and I have two mother's in my life. My adopted mother and my biological mother. My biological mother and I communicate more easier than my adopted mother. For some reason there are just people in our lives we communicate with more effectively. As much as your mom may want to know everything going on in your life, if there is something you know you'd get a lecture about I'd say keep it from her. That's easier when you live in a separate state and on your own away from your parent's home.

If you still live with her try and find some sort of common ground. Something you agree with her about and talk about that. Parents are great teacher's in that most of what we go through they already have been through. I hope this helps :D

Answer 6

Live in seperate houses!! No, really, it really depends on how old your daughter is and what kind of problems you are having with her. My daughter and I get along wonderfully, we respect each other, show concern for each other and spend as much quality time with each other as we can.

I have five children, four boys and her, she is now 19. She is the youngest and has been my best friend for as long as I can remember.

Contact me if you want or need to chat.

Answer 7

you have to initiate the time with her. she probably does want to spend time with you, she just feels awkward, and basically you are the enemy at times. if you have a family calendar, mark on a certain date, a certain time, that you and her are going to spend some time together. if she likes girly stuff, go get a pedicure together, go to a jewelry making class. if she is more of a sportsy person, take her to a "gameworks" type of place. a move is always good, but hard to have conversation. does she like coffee shops? just ask her if there is anything that you can help her with...

Answer 8

Mutual respect as persons, not as the daughter being the property of the mom, and the mom being the daughter's servant. But you know what, for what I can recall from ages 12 to 17 it was just a big screaming match between us...teen years are the worse.

Answer 9

spend some mother daughter time. sometimes you gotta make the first move or suggestion. do makeovers, go shopping, bake, talk, watch a favorite TV show of hers, go to a movie, play games, even go to a bingo hall together if your of age. those are just some suggestions. Even try a craft!!

Answer 10

Plan a few times a month where you guys do something like watch a movie or go to the mall. I think that would make you closer.