My girlfriend recently started a new job and in her first week she is working so many hours we have hardly gotten any time to spend together, and it looks like it could be this way for a long time. I know she needs her job and needs a good paycheck but i fear that she is working too much and no amount of money is worth her tiring herself out and leaving no time for us. Am I jealous?
2006-08-18 18:14:51 · 24 answers · asked by jbrbbt 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No..her job is not more important than your relationship with each other.
Be patient.
She just started this new job, and is probably working hard prove herself to her new bosses.
You're right, it may be for a very long time, which is why you are going to have to learn to have a lot of patience. I had a friend who was a newlywed, when her spouse decided to go back to school full-time for 2 years.
So, for the first 2 years of their marriage they barely saw one another while they both worked
full-time, and he went to school full-time. Throughout that entire time, she completely supported him by always insuring all of his clothes were always washed and ironed, picking up dry-cleaning, cutting the grass, managing their household expenses, cleaning the house and doing the laundry by herself, making all of his lunches, and always making sure he had a hot meal waiting for him when he came home late at night after school.
He finished school..and they recently purchased a beautiful well-kept home...and now he is supporting her in the same manner while she goes to school.
So...don't waste time being jealous...
BE supportive..
that is what she needs right now..
and she will love you even MORE
in the long run for having been there for her
when it counts.
Good Luck~*
2006-08-18 18:29:04 · answer #1 · answered by DG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't say you are jealous, it sounds more like lonely and missing her. I also don't think her job is more important to her than you are. Sometimes these things happen. For all you know, she could be thinking of the future for the two of you. If putting in the long hours now means she won't have to do it later, then support her. If it's too hard to be without her, take up a second job or call each other during her breaks. Write her little notes telling her how much you miss her or send her some flowers at work. Not only will it make you feel better, but it'll remind her of what a sweet guy she has who cares deeply for her. And if all else fails, you could come on here like the rest of us and start answering some questions to pass the time.
2006-08-18 18:22:52 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first, it sounds like you're a really caring and sweet boyfriend. It's good that you're worried about her working herself way too hard, because so many people do that.
I wouldn't call what you are jealousy, because it's not like you're jealous she has a job and you don't. You've just found yourself in a new chapter of your relationship that's hard and confusing.
First, you should bring this issue up with her. I would approach her with the attitude of you being worried about her health because stress is never good for a person. Then say that you miss spending time with her, but you understand that she has to make money.
Maybe you two can set up a weekly date night. Whenever it allows in both your schedules, so something fun together. Take her out to dinner, or she's probably so tired, just make her a nice dinner at home. Rent a video and give her a massage.
Good luck hun!
2006-08-18 18:21:43 · answer #3 · answered by cutiewithabooooty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is okay to be jealous of the time with your girlfriend, but there has to be compromise too. If this is a good job, and you can find alternative times to spend together then go for it. It may just take some creativity. Show her you love her by helping her out with the little things...chores around her home, etc.
Plan an evening to celebrate her that can happen at any time...even in the early AM. Support her by relieving her of the little things that are adding to tiring her out.
2006-08-18 18:23:20 · answer #4 · answered by baseballfan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
New jobs are always hectic at first. Give her a chance to settle in and learn the ropes - a month a least. If things are still hectic after that, find out why, from her. Don't let this job get in the way of your relationship, especially if you think this woman could be 'the one'. Give it a little time and her a little space.
2006-08-18 18:19:54 · answer #5 · answered by The Nana of Nana's 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think you're jealous. But she might think you are.
She might feel that she's underperforming at work (wich might not be necessrily true; some work environments are like this - they make you feel like crap no matter how much you do) this is why sh'e trying so hard.
Talk to her and express it to her that you're worried about her health and well-being, as well as that you miss her. Try not to put it as "what's more important?"
No offence, but do you make enough money to support a family of 4? If no, it seems like she has to work to support herself and her (future?) children.
2006-08-18 18:22:07 · answer #6 · answered by Snowflake 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldnt say your jealous i think your caring and thats great but hopefully she doesnt love her job as much as my ex did because obviously there was not a good out come to my situation..just talk to her about it and tell her you miss her...if you get a negative response like i did then i dont know what you should do...but i wouldnt talk bad about the people she works with just tell her your concerned and that you care about her and you dont want to see her wear herself out..also do you work? maybe you should help her out
2006-08-18 18:24:54 · answer #7 · answered by lonely heart club 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Robert D` nero !
You did say she needs the job, then you have to understand that she has to continue the way it is. All you can do is try to find her another job which is comfortable to both of you, meanwhile try to explain her your worries and care about her health and your relation. Truly tell you.."You really love her lots"
Best of luck for your relation and Love.!
2006-08-18 18:24:33 · answer #8 · answered by farcity79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though you are insecure about yourself and your relationship. If you know she needs her job and are secure with your relationship, why not try supporting her in her carrer instead of being so needy and selfish, this of course can only happen if you are secure in the relationship you have built with her.
2006-08-18 18:22:42 · answer #9 · answered by casey m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IT SOUND LIKE YOU BOTH AR ADJUSTING TO THE FACT THAT SHE WORKING AND WITH THIS NEW JOB SHE MAY
BE SPENTING MORE TIME AT WORK, BUT IT JUST BEEN
\A WEEK OR MORE, SO GIVE IT TIME, IT WILL WORK IT
SELF OUT, ARE YOU WORKING AS WELL, THEN MAYBE
BOTH OF YOU WILL FIND THE TIME TO BE TOGETHER.
2006-08-18 18:21:47 · answer #10 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋