Has anyone had their faith shattered by the death of a loved one?

Question

I was a faithful church goer for most of my life. I have had disappointments and good times to knowing I am blessed of God everyday. I found out a little over 5 years ago that my Grandfather (whom grounded me in my faith) had cancer. 10 months later he died, I havent recovered from that loss. My Grandfather raised me, I was closer to him than anyone and I just hurt all the time. I have been raised in church as I said and have heard that there is no problem to big that Jesus can take care of that no request will be denied if you have the faith that it will be done. I prayed, we prayed, all the local churches prayed and he withered away. I know that death is a part of life but I really needed that miracle for my grandfather. I just dont feel the same anymore , I want to I just dont know how. I dont want how I feel right now to hurt anyone else that I love. I hope that there is some wisdom out there.

Answer 1

I don't expect to be picked for best answer, as this is not my intention here. I have not experienced what you have gone through, but as I near my 17th birthday, I do realize that my grandparents are soon to pass away. All are in decent health, but they're definitely in their late 70's right now, and their lives are coming to a close.

I seek only to help console you, offer comforting words. Prayer to me is a form of communicating with God through the reminder of His presence. When I pray to God, while I hope for a miracle, the one thing that I know I'll always get out of this communication is encouragement and comfort. By praying, I remind myself that God is there for me, to hold me tightly while I watch the world around me change -- and not always as I would have hoped for. God may not intervene, but in a sense I feel that I can lean back into His arms and take His embrace wholeheartedly. God knows what I'm going through, and despite whatever the circumstances, loves me unconditionally. I know that with God's continued presence, I can turn to Him with all of my troubles and find the strength within myself to carry on.

Good luck with your faith, and God bless.

Answer 2

I don't know if this is wisdom, but here's my thoughts. What miracle did you want for your grandfather? Everlasting life? Eternal happiness? No death, pain or disappointments? What exactly did you ask Jesus for? It seems to me, He granted your prayer.

Let me also say that I am not a believer. However, I understand Christian faith. Your faith, and your grandfathers faith promised him deliverance from this world if he came to Jesus like a child. Life eternal is his reward, so isn't that what Jesus gave you, isn't that how your prayer was answered?

We don't live or die on own time, depending on your spirituality, its always in control of Someone or some thing (nature) else. That doesn't make it easier, and it doesn't make it any less painful. However, becoming a man means to be grounded in reality. And reality for humans is that we live to die, just like a car that depreciates the moment we take it off the lot, we begin dying the moment we are born. Its what our bodies are supposed to do. However our spirits, our souls have a whole different purpose, and its our responsibility to feed it, in your case with your faith in God and your acceptance of Jesus.

Answer 3

I have always believed in God, just recently have started Practicing my belief. However, back in 2000 I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd much wanted child. My oldest was 2 at the time.
Then, a week before Christmas I got bad news about my pregnancy at 6 months along. My baby son had something called Anencepaly, which meant only part of his skull and NONE of his brain had developed. It was a fatal birth defect. He was taken less than a month later.
I had questioned this. Why would God create a child not to even live to be born...but I answered myself that God does things in his own way, and we will learn the reason for them eventually if we do not understand right away.
I never lost my belief in God, but it was tested greatly. But, since then, I have had another son, who will be 4 next month (Sept) and another daughter who will be 2 in December. And you know what? I treasure my children so much, and possibly more than I would have if I had not lost my first son almost 6 years ago. Maybe that was the reason he took my baby. I know that if I don't find out while here on earth, I will be able to ask him, and my son when I get to heaven.

Answer 4

Yup. My dad's death when I was 9 was an important factor in my understanding and interaction with God. I was raised Presbyterian, and between the anger that a "kind and loving God" would do that to a 9 year old girl - coupled with a Born Again Christian telling me that my dad must have done something bad and that's why he died so young and now he was burning in hell - turned me away from Christianity.

We won't even discuss my two nieces and nephew who were born at 20 weeks gestation and had no chance of survival as preemies. I have a hard time with the idea of a "kind and loving God" who would torment my brother and sis-in-law (who are both Lutheran, in fact my SIL's mother was a Lutheran pastor) like that.

Answer 5

Since you say that your faith was strong once and you were a true believer, then do you believe that your grandfather is in heaven now? Isn't that the ultimate goal of all believers, to one day go to a place that is perfect with no worries, no sorrows? Your grandfather seems like he had a lot of faith in his life, so why not rejoice that your grandfather has finally been able to pass into heaven?

I am sorry if this does not help. I am not a very religious person, but I know that religions help some people through the very hardest times of their life. So if you do have faith, don't turn your back on it, let it help you through this time.

Answer 6

treborbandito,
Well, sounds like love to me. You miss him, don't you? I suppose that that kind of love goes a long way.

What's your promise, treborbandito? What promise from God did you claim before you got out of bed? Most people don't even know what I am talking about. But there is trust in God that we have, isn't it? That makes us Christian. It sets us apart from the World, and makes us one of His.

Sometimes we have to be reminded that nothings changed. I mean, you lost someone you love, but the sun still came up the next day, the birds still sing, the flowers bloom, and the world turns.

What makes today different from yesterday? It's a new day to trust God, more than you did yesterday. yesterdays faith won't get you through today.

Here's a promise from God that you can trust Him for:
Philippians 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!

5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

It sounds like a promise to me! If you rejoice in the Lord, and be gentle, expecting His return, His peace will guard your heart and mind.

Are you going to let that sit on the shelf and wait another day to claim it?
Come on! It's what you are looking for isn't it? Is the Lord your peace or what?

Answer 7

I have lost several friends recently, both parents,people who are younger than me, three brother-in laws, neighbors.
There is a time for all things, leaving this world is one of them, coming into the world is another.
I have been attending one funeral a month it seems, I think God may be taking the good people out of here, and I am worried a little about leaving this world too. The world is becoming more violent with all the wars going on around, maybe God is saving some of the good ones so that they won't suffer nuclear war.
Most of the people I knew were good.

Answer 8

First off, I am really sorry . I think everyone who has lost a loved one, can relate to your pain.
Faith is a big word, and next to Hope and Love, the biggest word out there. It is the hard and rough times, where you really need to hold on to Faith. It keeps you from going crazy. Stop trying to make sense out of Death, you won`t be able to. It was just his time , he was needed elsewhere. Remember him the way he was, remember all he tought you! You have to let him go. He would want you to get on with your life. We all have to go sometime. Your pain may never go away completely, but i promise you that it will get better. You said that he grounded you in your faith, believe in it. He did.
I hope you can find your peace.

Answer 9

I would think that believing would make you stronger.
God does not give us diseases. There are many factors but God is not one. Most diseases come from mans errors.
Your grandfather is in heaven and watching over you of this I am sure.
Talk to a minister. Restore your faith.
God doesn't always give us what we ask for. If he did the world would be over populated. God promised us today but not tomorrow.
I am sorry for your loss but keeping your faith will help you get through. I am sure that is what your grandfather wanted.
Hang in there hon! What you are feeling is normal. It will get easier . Take it one day at a time but continue to pray for strength.

Answer 10

If you prayed for healing and I'm sure you did. God gave your Grandfather his ultimate healing. The only way for your Grandfather to be completely well again was for him to go to heaven. God did not mean for this hurt you and turn you away from Him. We all have to die sometime in our lives. That usually means losing our older loved ones first. In these times of trial and tribulation we should turn to God for our comfort and healing. As far as I can see you got the ultimate miracle in as much as your Grandfather is in heaven and if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior you will see your Grandfather again on the other side of the pearly gates. God bless you and I will pray for you in your time of loss.