Shy 2 year old?

Question

My son is 2 years old and he's very shy.I don't abuse him or yell at him or anything and I don't know why he's so shy.He plays with his cousin who's 6 years old but when I take him to the park he plays by himself and doesn't want to play with the other kids.He looks so lonely when he plays by himselfWhen he's around me and my family he's the happiest,and the most loudest kid ever,but when someone else come's around he's so quiet and doesn't talk or play.Is he too young for me to be worrying? What can I do to help him?

Im a first time mom

No stupid answers please

Answer 1

no he is not too young. hey he just don't want to be around strangers. i mean this is kind of a good thing. he will eventually open up when he gets a little older. if you want you can put him in day care so he can learn social skills and he will open up. however, this will not happen over night. it may take a day , a week, or two weeks for him to warm up to strangers in school. but when he realize that his peers and teachers are friendly then you will not have a problem with him being shy. my 2 year old cousin was shy around me and other people until his mom put him in daycare. now that boy is friendly and wild. but he will ignore you as soon as he sees his parents. lol kids are unpredictable. but remember all strangers are not good strangers and if he does not want to be around some of them, it is OK. i believe kids see things in other people and they can pick up on a psycho. lol good luck!

Answer 2

No worries mom. It is very normal for 2 year olds to play by themselves. I have taught preschool for over 12 years and it is very common for children to play by themselves until they are around 4.

Never label him as shy. It will put him in a box that will be hard to crawl out of. He is probably just slow to warm up to new things.

To help him to gain some confidence, say things like "You did that by yourself! Look how high you can jump! You used so many colors on your painting!" These are intrinsic rather than extrinsic ("Good job!", stickers) rewards.

If you really feel he is lonely when he plays by himself, do some role playing with him at home. Give him some ideas on how to approach other children. "I bet that little boy would love to see you cars! You can show him your favorite one." This will help him to gain some social skills.

Keep socializing him. You can keep taking him to the park or invite a friend over for a play date. You may want to consider preschool when he is 3.

Enjoy him now! He's a perfectly normal 2 year old. Watch out when he turn 4! You'll be posting another question "How can I get my 4 year old to be less interest in his friends?" :)

Answer 3

I think that all you can do is encourage him. Perhaps you could also model the behaviour you want him to copy, by starting conversations with other mothers at the park whom you don't know. Who are you expecting him to be friends with - strangers? Kids he's never met before? Enrol him in as many playgroups as you can find, they are vital at this stage, and when he knows the kids in the group I"m sure he will get better with the shy thing. See, I'm shy with strangers too. I don't like going up to play with people I don't know. I think I'm normal.
You have to make an effort also to make friends with another mother who has a child the same age, so they can have playmates. Perhaps you could ask around at church groups, playgroups, friendship groups etc. Sometimes when they are young you have to help them find a good friend, and you might have to make friends with another mother to do it. Tell them you are looking for a playmate for your two year old, they might be looking for the same thing you are.
Good luck.
I have a three year old. Since he's been going to daycare, he's made lots of friends, but it was easier for him because his littermate attended the same place.

Answer 4

My three year old is the SAME way. He is the loudest most precocious little man when around family, but in the midst of people he doesn't know or hasn't seen in a while, he becomes somewhat of an introvert.

I don't think it's worth worrying about now. But to help him, you could teach him how to meet people. Do you meet people you don't know very often? Maybe he's just doing what he observes mommy do. Children learn by imitating. Give him something to imitate.

Answer 5

He is still young. When you go to the park, do you go with him to the other kids and talk to them, and make him see that it is okay for him to play with these kids?
I think you shouldn't worry, but, do what I suggest... sometimes they need you with them for a few minutes plus, you will show him how to interact with others.
When my daughter was little, she was the only child, and I think she was about 4... I would take her to a park with a wading pool, and I always felt bad that she didn't have anyone to play with.. but, she told me one time to stay by the pool for a few minutes and then she would find a friend and I could sit down on the bench then.
Kids go through so many different stages, don't worry.

Answer 6

I was the same way when I was young and what my mom did was put me in clubs our activities I was interested in so I could interact with others. It helped, but to this day I'm still a little shy. I have 4 children, and right now I think it's a little too early to worry about it.

Answer 7

It might just be his personality. I was like that as a child and still am. Perhaps if he was with you at a park you two together could go up to a friendly kid and introduce your son, just to initiate. Then he would feel more comfortable if you were around.

Answer 8

one thing I know is children, I've raised enough of them.... some kids are just normally shy.. but this sounds like a little more than that.. it wouldn't hurt to talk to a therapist about this and he'll just give you some techniques to use to get him to socialize a little more... he's only 2 so you can staighten this out now before he goes to preschool and it becomes more of a problem... Children will need to learn to socialize in order to survive... otherwise he could be made fun of and more serious problem could arise.. A therapist will know best how to handle it...you're a good mom to notice this and be concerned about it.....

Answer 9

Don't be alarmed...he is in a phase some kids his age go through...not all children were meant to be outgoing...they really are just like adults in this case...don't force it...when he begins school it will change...if he goes to any type of day care setting, ask that they pay attention to his behavior with the other kids when you are not around...

Don't worry so much...it will be just fine...

Answer 10

It's good that he is wary of strangers and takes time to warm up to other children. He is his own individual self and not a needy child. He's going to be fine. Don't force him to be so open to people...there are so many weird ones out here now...even family.