i hate my step mother!!!?

Question

i hate her!she came into my life all in a sudden....even after 5 years,i never can love her like my own mom....but she's the one who took care of my dad since me and my siblings live in boarding schools......what should i do??

Answer 1

Just because she's in your family, doesn't mean you *have* to like her. There's no reason to fight with her or *hate* her, but if she does things for your family, then you should appreciate that. You can respect her without fawning over her, and that doesn't mean that she takes your mother's place.

Answer 2

First off you don't have to love your stepmother as if she was your mother,and i am sure by the kindness she showed towards your father that she doesn't expect for you to,but here is the thing you can not pick your fathers mate,therefore you need to show respect.Make this easier for your father,as well for yourself.she might be the best friend you might need,you never know.She is older,so therefore she is suppose to have more wisdom to help you with issues,but you don't want that,and you could really be missing out on a friendship there.Remember there is no one on God's green earth that could ever take the place of your mother,when you start realizing that,i truly think you will be more happier with your stepmother.She needs you as well.If you don't make a true heart filled mends you are only going to hurt yourself,along with other family members as well and another thing,you might dislike some of her ways and that's okay,she might not care for some of your ways too,Not everyone is every bodies cup of tea,and that is totally fine,But to say you hate someone is a really mean,harsh,powerful word,that i prefer not to use myself.We are forgiven by the measurement that we forgive,just food for thought,even though this is hard on you now,trust me it will get easier and you need to focus more on the good in people than the bad.The big question is"What has this woman actually done to you"? to feel this much malice in your heart.Try to enjoy life and every moment that you have,be happy!I wish you the best and Good Luck to you!

Answer 3

i do no longer think of it relatively is a case of them hating the youngsters. it is maximum possibly an errors in communique or a feeling of being an interloper in the kin. some infants discover it no longer common to have a sparkling stepmum and the transition isn't common. there's a sparkling authority discern which infants do no longer straight away comprehend and that they might sense that the stepmum is taking their organic and organic mothers place or taking their time and interest faraway from their father. same as a results of fact the stepchildren, the stepmum have it tough as properly. they have willingly married a guy with infants which she now has exchange into mom discern to. If she hasn't infants of her own, this would maximum in all probability be complicated for her and he or she would be able to instruct frustration whilst the youngster is being disrespectful. She additionally would sense she desires to combat for interest from her new husband and as properly as ensuring her new stepchildren are comfortable with the recent life they are all aside of. The transition of bringing a sparkling member into the kin isn't common for each individual. Frustration will become anger which reasons arguments. the two step-discern and newborn would desire to artwork jointly to ascertain their relationship is respectful and friendly.

Answer 4

Figure out why you hate her....you dont have to love her like your mom. No one is your mom BUT your mom. But maybe she can be a friend, or care about her because she means something to your father.

Talk to her and try to get to know her. If she does something that bothers you, let her know that you think it's not cool and work on how to better the relationship.

She doesnt have to be your mom but she is your elder, in that respect and that fact that she takes care of your dad (and hopefully good care) you need to try to like her just a lil, for your dad. :)

Answer 5

Is your Dad happy with her? Regardless of wether he is or not, she deserves your respect. Try to put yourself in her shoes... She's that one that's walked into the relationship alone, into an instant family. She is not your mother in any way however perhaps you could try to make an effort with her and be "friends". I'm sure once you make an effort, you will find that you may appreciate having her in your life. PS. Think of your Dad... he only wants to make the right decisions for his family and he needs your support.

Answer 6

Thank God you have someone to take care of him. Maybe she is not trying to replace your mom. I am a step mother and It sucks on my end of it too, but I still tuff it out! Be a bigger person and put your dad before your self

Answer 7

What has she done to you to cause you to feel such a strong emotion as hate? You said she has taken care of your dad....that is a pretty good thing. And besides, no one says you have to love her like you do your mom. That is understandable. All you really need to do is accept her as your dad's wife and as such, your step-mom. That's all! Pretty simple when you think about it. If your dad loves her, and she is good to your dad then it's all good.

Answer 8

i used to feel the same way about my stepmom. But think about your dad, is he happy? I know its hard to think someone is trying to fill your mom's shoes, but they can be really supportive and fun too. Just be pacient and understanding. She's might be feelign the same way. She is in unfamiliar territory too. Give it time, try being her friend.

Answer 9

What should you do? Well, no one, including yourself, can make you like somebody. Give her the respect she deserves. You can be a decent person to her without having an affection, can you not?

Answer 10

this isn't just about you---do you think it would be better for your father if he was alone?? He has just as much right to happiness as what your looking for-so give her a chance--its not easy being the outsider in the family.