everytime i try to show a big girl some interest, she always acts like im faking. all my life ive been dating the skinny model type girl because of this. i dont feel i need to prove myself to any girl so i dont spend my time proving that im for real. can i not talk to a big the same way i do with a model type? because im not into changing like that. dont get me wrong i understand where she is coming from but damn, what do i have to do?
2006-08-18 11:52:59 · 15 answers · asked by egoodkis 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you have to understand that everyday... big girls are beaten down by the media... tv, magazines, billboards, radio... all showing/telling them that they're nothing... they're not desirable if they don't fit into the mold of what the media thinks is beautiful. so... when an attractive guy comes up to them and shows interest... they're programmed to think it's a joke because that just... isn't supposed to happen.
you gotta try to understand the world they live in. they are willing to take less than what they are worth becuase their whole lives... they've been told that the extra 20 pounds on their body put them in a category of human beings that are considered a waste of oversized, lumpy, ugly space.
2006-08-18 12:01:12 · answer #1 · answered by whateva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Big girls need love too, that's sure.
But there's also a lot of discrimination in our culture against people, especially women, who are overweight. The fact that you're even referring to "hefty girls" and "model type" girls as your point of reference tells me that you've bought into that distinction, with you wanting to generally to date "model type" girls. Women in our society have certainly bought into that distinction.
Maybe the girls to whom you've shown interest have been discriminated against and hurt in the past. They're not "model type girls" and maybe feel unattractive. If that's so, they may be sensitive to being played with, and they wonder what your motive might be. They may not believe that you a genuine interest in them or even that you might even be playing with their emotions. In any case, even if you are showing genuine interest, they may think, "You're with me now...until a "model type girl" catches your attention."
Maybe you can start off as friends with no agenda and just see her as a person (not a type) and talk candidly about what your interest in her is. Good luck!
2006-08-18 19:19:00 · answer #2 · answered by Joe_D 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Big girls don't always get the attention coke bottle shaped women do . Just go over and talk to her charming but let her know your serious . May be give them your number to let them know your not playing a game .
2006-08-18 19:01:35 · answer #3 · answered by Aila126 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop the fake smile and talk to them until they listen but don't start by trying to chat them up!
2006-08-18 18:58:46 · answer #4 · answered by Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The big girls you've been meeting must have no self-esteem.
Sad.
2006-08-18 18:58:08 · answer #5 · answered by MaryBeth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to them that you dont mind girls with a little meat on them.
2006-08-18 18:58:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on your approach. Don't ever say "You are cute to be a big girl". High five Tina M!!
2006-08-18 19:00:36 · answer #7 · answered by RedDreads 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They're not used to guys being interested in them.
2006-08-18 18:58:23 · answer #8 · answered by Stranger in a Strangeland 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you refer to them as hefty. Hefty is a brand of GARBAGE BAGS!!!
2006-08-18 18:58:03 · answer #9 · answered by tina m 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can read between the lines here, pal....and so can they. You are not sincere.....you are trying to prove something to yourself!!! Good for them! You are a Looser!
2006-08-18 18:58:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋