Submissive Women: What appeals to you?

Question

about submission? I am trying to better understand my new gf's desires in this regard.

Answer 1

I'm not submissive all the time but do like it from time to time when it comes to sex. I like to have my hands tied and for the guy to be able to do what he wants (within reason of course). Its the whole him taking charge thing that turns me on. I like acting as though I have no control and he can do whatever he want.

Answer 2

Even though I'm a guy, I think that I can add insight into this question, due to my own personal experience and from interaction with others.

There are basically two kinds of submission. One is the standard "in the bedroom" type activity, which may or may not involve sex but is usually sexual in appearance in many ways. A better term for this would be bottoming. This tends to involve activities such as being bound up, being the "victim" in an S/M interaction, etc. It may involve the top (Dominant) giving commands to the bottom.

As I stated, this is usually restricted to certain locations, such as in the bedroom or at a dungeon party. The appeal of being a bottom is that the bottom is the receiver of stimulus, both physical and mental. The brain responses to these by producing endorphins that act on the pleasure centres of the brain. Given enough stimulus, it can give the bottom a sense of otherworldness, something of a natural high.

The second kind of submission, found in the context of D/s, is more involved as it tends to be outside of the bedroom. This is where a submissive gives over the responsibility over various aspects of their lives over to a Dominant, who then accepts the responsibility. The price for this transfer of responsibility is the surrender of control and in many cases freedom (within the relationship).

This kind of submission has its own appeal as one can hand over decision-making processes to a trusted other, and that can be a relief to some who have lives full of responsibility elsewhere. Plus, there can be a sensation of specialness, almost like a prized pet, that can make one feel valued more than just being in an equal partnership.

Neither type above requires the other to be present, although usually D/s submission will include bottoming, but it's not necessary. Indeed, a submissive might actually be a top in the bedroom because that's what the Dominant wants. In any case, I hope that I've answered your questions and helped out. Of course, this is very general and if you are looking to understand your girlfriend's desires, discuss them with her. Every relationship is unique, and you will need to discover how that plays out in your relationship for the two of you.

I wish you well.

Answer 3

is she submissive during sex? like i know when you're jsut starting in a new relationship, you might want him to take the conrol during sex until you feel comfortable...some women feel morecomfortable it's all...

Answer 4

You may get some answers if you were more specific.