Does anyone have advice for potty training a very resistant child?

Question

I have a son that refuses to use the potty. If set him on it, he will not go, no matter how long he sits there. He would sooner go on the floors or in his pants than use the toilet. We have done everything we know to do and then some but to no avail. This has been going on for over a year now (he is 3). I am simply at my wits end. We have 3 other children and have never had this much trouble. I know every child is different but this seems extreme to me. Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

The doctor would usually say, "Don't rush him, let him go on his own." But here's some advice, buy your son a small potty/toilet, they usually sell them in the dollar store. Put about 2-4 cups of water in it. Throw some cheerios in it, it has to be the little o's cheerios. And tell him that when its time to go potty, aim for the cheerio. Every time he goes give him a reward, like some time in the park, a piece of candy, 30-minutes of any show he wants to, you know something within those lines. And don't forget to clap, smile, and tell him how proud you are when he uses the potty. Remind him that he's a "big boy" and fill him with hugs and kisses. This worked for my son and he just turned two in June.

Answer 2

be patient. I am potty training twin girls who are three. it's a pain sometimes but it will work out. try and bribe him. give him candy if he goes on the potty, a new toy, star a sticker chart and after so many stickers he gets a toy or something. i hate doing it but when our girls would go in their pull ups or on the floor, the got a spankin and sat on the potty for 2 min. the if they continued to do it for a week or so the time went up. gradually increase the time. it's like a timeout on the potty. or every half hr or so take him on the potty and make him sit there for a lil while. there's a lot of great websites you can look at that gives you advice. Do some research see what method works for you. or you can try them all like I did.

Answer 3

My nephew held out until he was 5½! I trained both my girls at 2 and that was that.

You say he will go on the floor or in his pants, so try the following: Make him clean up the mess, or clean himself, EACH & EVERY TIME, even at night. Take away the diapers and cover his mattress with trash bags, etc., so as not to ruin it. Don't help; if he ruins a favorite pair of pants, throw them out! Don't yell, don't punish, don't threaten; be very matter of fact about it, and make sure the rest of the family does the same. Also, may send his oldest brother OR sister in to the potty with him; little ones tend to want to emulate big sibling instead of mom or dad. Oh, and rent a carpet cleaner for when it is all done, and buy him a special toy when he goes one week with no daytime accidents. My sister now wishes she had listed to me and tried this. It works.

Answer 4

Don't focus so much on his age. I assure you he won't go to kindergarten in pampers! Speaking of pampers, eliminate them and pull ups too. Your child needs to feel cold and wet when he has accidents. More work for you, yes, but it will not last forever. Try letting anyone who needs to use the restroom, older siblings, yourself and your spouse, invite him to go to sit on the potty when they go. Buy special soaps or wipes for him that only he can use to wash up afterward.
Don't sit him on the potty for extended periods of time. Not only is it uncomfortable, he will begin to associate it with punishment. Speaking of punishment, don't spank or give time outs for accidents. You may try making him assist in cleaning up the messes and/or rinsing out the soilded undergarments.
Try sitting him on the potty when he wakes up and after meals. No more than about 3 minutes sitting time. Also, some children don't like to see their waste or see it disposed. Just close the lid and dispose of it later.
If all this fails, I suggest speaking to his pediatrician. He may have a developmental problem. This is unlikely, but it never hurts to cover all the bases.
Hope this helps!

Answer 5

My 3 year old son was very hard to potty train too, but we used a sticker chart and it worked great. We got a piece of posterboard and decorated it with his name and a bunch of pictures. Everytime he used the potty we gave him a sticker to put on his potty chart and in no time he was potty trained! GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

there are many thing that u can try. y dont u throw 1 or 2 cherrios in the toilet and tell ur soon to aim and shoot at it, or as soon as he wakes up in the morning take him to the toilet and yeah have him sit there all day. have candy and toys laying around so that when he does it u can give it to him for a job well done. dont feel bad my son did that too, none of these advise work on him i had to go original on him, he was also 3 yrs old. so i sat down with him in the bathroom with a sad face and explained to him that if he dont stop using the bathroom on himself his PIPI would fall off. LOL IT WORKED

Answer 7

put a few cheerios in the toilet and tell him to try and sink them....or offer a reward when he goes on the potty even if its just a sticker, when he goes give him alot of praise....my daughter was the same way, i finally told her that if she wanted her dora bike she'd have to go potty because bikes are way to big for kids who still wear diapers, she started going immediately

Answer 8

let me know when you find out my 4th child is the worst of all my kids in this subject. she is 2 and she will sit there all day long but will not put it in the toilet. she has a couple times gone in on her own, she will tell me when she has gone, but wont go for me i think it is just an independent, do it when i want, type of thing.
good luck

Answer 9

try putting a small table in front of the toliet with a book he can look at (the potty book) that may help, my son would urinate but not have a bowel movement and doing that helped him go.

Answer 10

MAYBE YOUR PUSHING HIM TOO HARD? HE MAY JUST SENSE YOUR FRUSTRATION , AND THINK ITS A GAME. JUST BE PATIENT, UNDERSTANDING, ASK HIM FREQUENTLY IF HE NEEDS TO USE THE POTTY, LEAVE THE BATHROOM DOOR OPEN , AND REMIND HIM OFTEN IF HE HAS TO GO , HE CAN GO HIMSELF OR ASK FOR HELP. THE AGES OF 2- 4 SEEM LIKE THE AGES WHEN OUR KIDS TRY TO DO WHAT THEY KNOW WE WOULD LIKE THEM NOT TO DO OR THE OTHER WAY AROUND. WE TELL THEM ITS BLACK THEY SAY "NO" ITS WHITE ... MR./MISS INDEPENDENT !!!!!!!!