my parents won't allow me to have a boyfriend... any suggestions to what i can do about it?

Question

here is the thing again.. sometimes i just want to hate my parents because they won't allow me to have a boyfriend... i mean? what's wrong with me? or my boyfriend? i mean he's a really nice guy and my parents know him and his parents very well. they even work at the same company. i see nothing wrong with what we're doing. it's so hard to lie to my parents all the time because everytime i tell the truth, they scold me very super and there was even one time my mom was so mad that she called up my boyfriend and quarrelled him on the telephone. what should i do? i mean. i can't find any reason why the won't allow me. i mean, i'm a very smart kid, and i am responsible when it comes to doing household chores and to sum it all up, i am a very good daughter to my parents, yet they won't allow me. i find their rules very unfair. help me. what should i do in order to convince them?

Answer 1

i think the answer lies in your own question.....

"i'm a very smart kid" ... you're still a kid... grow up a little, stand on your own lil two feet... and if this good guy's still with you then, tell them... i doubt they'll refuse!

Answer 2

You don't say how old you are or how old your boyfriend is. That makes a huge difference. My son has had a "girlfriend" since pre-K but we think it's cute. Now he kicks us under the table if we say he has a girlfriend. When will I let him start actually dating? Let's see...he can group date when he is 15 or 16. He can start to date on his own when he is 16 or 17. I figure when he is 17 or 18 if he gets serious about a girl and that girl is 17 or 18 then we will sit down with them and talk about their plans for the future...truth is, I don't want him getting into a serious relationship until he graduates from college but if it is true love then we will deal with that when we get there.

Dating should be fun and lighthearted when you are in your teens. If you are not at least 15 then you are too young for a real boyfriend no matter how great the two of you are. Girls who date too young often end up in a teenage pregnancy no matter how hard they try to make the right decisions.

Answer 3

Depends on your age.... You never mentioned that. Having a boyfriend is like having a license. You have to be a certain age to get one, first you get a learners (or dater's) permit, where you are only allowed to go out while supervised by a licensed person. It doesnt have to be your mom & dad, it could be an older cousin or sibling. Then when you have proved yourself to be worthy and responsible, then you can move up to a license. They probably dont want you to get pregnant or have sex, usually boys like your friend who is understanding, and knows your family are the perfect candidate to be your baby daddy... why?? Because u are comfortable with him, and your guards are down, and u dont think he would ever hurt you. Truth is most guys will ruin a friendship if theres a chance that they'll score. You sound like a great daughter,,, ask your parents if he can come over supervised, like u guys could watch movies in the living room..My mom always knew my next move before I made it, and now looking back, I'm glad that she did. Things will get better, just focus on u, school, and keeping your parents happy & proud of you, that way when its time for u to date, they wont spaz.

Answer 4

Well How old are you anyway? Are you a good student? Hpws your grades? I dont want to be mean but If you were 13, i would not allow you to date. If your a good student, maybe they think you should focus on school and maintain your grade. They might think having a boyfriend will mess up your grade. Parents now a days are very protective of their children. There are a lot of kids getting pregnant as early as 11 years old. There are a lot of sexual diseases too:) Maybe they think your still too young to think about this stuff..Give them time to adjust to the fact that their little girl is now a lady:) Be Patient..Maybe when you and your mom have a bonding time, you can tell her how you feel. Stop lying to them. That would only make them distrust you. Talk to your mom and tell her the truth.

Answer 5

This is typical, I am a guy and in my teen years my parents, Mom, was so restrictive and there wasn't a better son than I, although you avoid mentioning your age, your under your parents roof until 18, you must do what they wish providing it isn't going to hurt you or anyone else...at least that's what the cop told me when my Mom called them to tell them I won't listen....I've been were you are and I've since been were your parents are...its your parents responsibility to protect you and provide all the opportunity thats available to you...a bf is a contradiction and a bump in the road with such responsibility of a parent....one that without can more easily reach their goals...its not about how good he is to you and how your heart pitter patters when he is around...its about raising a responsible, well adjusted child..what they do with that knowledge when of age to be responsible for themselves is out of your parents hands...but until it is...they set the rules...you breaking them and lying about your behavior will only prove your wrong and they are right.

Answer 6

First off: how old are you Hun???
and I'm sure your parents have a good reason for not letting you date. I will not let my 16yr old date, but there are reasons behind that.

Guys out there your age are only looking for one thing, you see all those Young girls out there that are having baby?

if you where to have a baby at your age you do know that life as you know it now is over? no more going out with friends, because unless your old enough to work, you will not have the money to pay for a sitter...

parents think of the long term responsibility's of dating....

Just hang in there Hun, one day you will get your chance and then your not going to wont to anymore...LOL... To much heart ache from dating.

Stay single as long as you can, believe me

Answer 7

you never mentioned how old you are and that is probably a major factor ... if you are only 13 then i'd agree with them... at 16 or 17 though, maybe even 15,you would have a better case with me and probably most of the Y!A community. the other suggestion is, show them up and get a girl friend .. "ok mom and dad since i cant have aboyfriend, i'm going to be a lesbian and havea girlfriend."

Answer 8

It's obvious to me that your parents are trying to do what's best for you. You are too young to make certain decisions. They don't think you are mature enough or old enough for a boyfriend, whether they know the boy and his parents or not isn't the issue. Listen to them. Please grow up. They know what's best, even if you don't agree with them.

From where I see it, you have two choices. 1} Continue to see this boy, and get in even more trouble when you are caught. or 2} Just be friends with him for a few years, until you are old enough and mature enough (in your parent's eyes) to have a more mature dating relationship. You're just too young right now. Good luck.

Answer 9

Have an open and honest and respectful conversation explaining your reasons. Maybe you can come to a compromise - like including curfews or a promise not to get physically involved.

Answer 10

you do not state your age....if u are 16 then u are old enough to date. however, ALWAYS remember that your parents have your best interests at heart...and as long as u are under 18 or reside in their household---then u must live by their rules

Answer 11

maybe your parents are trying to protect you, maybe you are to young.I didn't see any age, some day you will probably appreciate your parents, a teenager can ruin their whole life in a second, don't be in a hurry to grow up, once your an adult always an adult, enjoy being young while you can.
Do you know any adults that are all that happy?