What makes a baby happy? Is it nurture or nature or both.?

Question

I wonder if a baby's happiness can be significantly affected by how you are with them? So if you're happy, laughing, singing and upbeat, like I try to be, it should follow too that the baby will be happy. Or is it just something in their own nature? Or even a mix of both. Wondering as a curious mum wanting to do her best for her baby.

Any general tips from mums/dads on what makes for a happy baby appreciated too

Answer 1

If you are warm and loving to children then they will be warm and loving back towards you.

Babies brains are like sponges, they soak up everything and when they are old enough to mimic, if you act like Mr Angry, they will copy.

Once they start mixing with other children then this could change as they gain differing experiences for different situations.

My boy was a really loving affectionate kid until he started school and now, whilst he is still the same for the majority of the time, sometimes he can be a little s**t but we know a lot of this is to do with the playground etc.

I think that being positive is the best thing you can do. Do not show any weaknesses or fears as they will be exploited and always be happy.

A line from Affirmation by Savage Garden 'I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do'. I always remember this and as long as I can put my kids to bed saying that I have done the best I can for them today, I am happy. If not I try to learn from my mistakes to make sure it doesn't happen again.

Also, let them learn from their mistakes, it makes for a stronger child.

Answer 2

There is a lot of research indicating that babies that do not receive love, nurture, and touch do not thrive physically and emotionally. So it is wonderful for your child to receive all of those things. Your bright outlook gives him/her a good environment to grow up in and helps teach him/her how to interact with others and deal with stress.

I do believe somewhat in the whole nature thing though. I have four children and three of them are real "Pollyanna" types. Mostly happy, take life's disappointments in stride etc. My second child is a pure pessimist and was from the start. He came out peeing on everyone and has never stopped! The poor child had colic so of all of my babies he received the most holding, singing, and nurturing of any of them and it didn't do a bit of good. He just doesn't have a real sunny disposition. He is well liked and popular in school anyway though because he expresses himself well and with great humor. He is also a natural leader. So I don't worry about it too much since it just seems to be ingrained in his nature and his type of person is needed in our society too. He'll probably be an artist, journalist or politician or something. I know it sounds like a strange combination but it fits him somehow.

It's worth your while to be happy and loving around your child. I am and it may be the only thing that keeps the second as well balanced as he is. The other three could be abused and neglected and would probably be kind and loving people all of their life. Just my intuition as a mother and a teacher of teens.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

I'm afraid it is simply a matter of understanding the human need for comfort and contentment - whether it be in a baby, or adult!

Creating a stable environment with boundaries gives a child a feeling of security. It knows when it will next get fed, or changed, or put to bed etc. The child is less likely to become fretful. Even for older children, a routine like having fish on Friday, or roast beef on Sunday, or scouts on Thursday, for example gives a framework of security to its everyday life.

Babies are said to pick up on the moods of their mothers, even from inside the womb. So if you are a relaxed mother it will be reflected in the child's own behaviour. Singing, chatting, laughing and being upbeat has to be good. Worrying ,arguing, and carrying on creates stress all round and is not good for any family happiness! Even when a child is miserable, or crying, you being upbeat and confidently in control will make baby feel more secure.

For a newborn baby, my own personal philosophy is, fit the child immediatley into the family's or your own routine. It will soon find its own equilibrium within it and it's body clock will adjust quite naturally to sleeping times and feeding times that are socially acceptable to you. I'm old fashioned and don't believe in "demand" anything!

Actually, I often "swaddled" my first baby in the first few weeks, even wrapping her in a way so she could suck her thumb; and she was so content. See: ttp://www.todaysparent.com/baby/healthsafety/article.jsp?content=20030807_121003_2224&page=1

Warmth, comfort, cleanliness and a full tummy are the fundamental basics of a happy baby. From that, his/her personality will develop more positvely. I think you'll find your instinctive responses will pay off, anyway.

Answer 4

It's definately a mixture of both. It is widely accepted that the nature/nurture process is far more dynamic than first believed. Obviously a childs capacity to learn what they live has a significant impact, but so does the innate genetic traits from it's parents. You should know your child best, being anxious about doing all that you can may transfer to your child. Try to relax a little, you are more than a mother don't lose sight of your true identity. Don't try too hard, just enjoy, there not babies long!

Answer 5

I'd say it's a mix becasue if you give them attention, all their needs are met and you are happy then yes they should be happy too. If your angry or upset they can sense that too so that amy get them upset in addition they would cry or be upset if they need something. A baby can also be happy on their own by other things like objects n a room that may amuse them or other people as well. Babies are people too and just like older children and adult can have feelings for various resons, a baby can too it's just harder fora baby to communicate due to lack of speech.

Answer 6

You can never do to much of a good thing with your baby. Talking, singing, laughing, and reading especially are all keys to your baby's happiness and contentment. And your'e a wonderful mother just wanting to do the best for your baby.
Even when your baby is sleeping just your voice talking or humming is a security for them.
I wish you all the luck in the world to you and your family!!!

Answer 7

i think its a mix of both, some babies naturally have more of a happy nature but obvoiusly if youre acting happy around them some of this will rub off onto the child, think about animals prefer happy owners- so do babies prefer happy parents! if youre angry or upset its likely your baby will pick up on this

and take no notice of people saying this is stupid, it may sound like an obvoius answer to them but youre clearly a first time mum who just wants to double check everything to make sure youre doing right, this is perfectly normal and your baby is lucky that you care enough to check things!!

Answer 8

Absolutely - both! They come right out with their own personalities. Some babies are cranky and fussy right from the getgo, others are sunny & mellow. Others sleep a lot, are very quiet. Others are loud!

Also if the mom is stressed, baby senses it and is stressed too. I can't count the number of times I've walked in, everyone is in tears and within minutes I've calmed that baby and he's either fallen asleep or happily breastfeeding.

Answer 9

actually you are right , in karen horneys theory she said that a childs behavior is reflected of how the relationship with parent and child are , if the parent shows the child they love them and do as you mentioned here , they will be happy , also if the child is ignored and only picked up to be fed or changed then the child will grow up depressed and unhappy , maybe even antisocial. in my opinion though it is both the interactions between parent and child and also the environment that they grow up in that determines their behavior (and mood) , im not counting the biological aspects of it but yes those count too , i forgot which psychologists theory that was but thats the one i think is most accurate. by the way , good choice on being that way towards your child , you sound like a good mother , good luck with your baby.

Answer 10

its neither. a baby is not yet self-aware and has no understanding of emotions so if your happy or sad a baby will not pick up on it. babies have no way of communicating other than to cry if something is wrong or to signal they want something, a good parent will be able to spot what this is. In nature the amount of crying is governed by predation, the more yuo cry the more attention you get off mum but the more likely you will get eaten. thankfully our babies don't worry about wolves eaten them so can cry a lot more needless to say some babies will resort to crying a lot more than others.