Why do dog owners get annoyed when my 4 yr old son is scared of them?

Question

Why do a lot of dog walkers seem to take offense when my 4 year old son runs to me screaming (and I have to lift him up) if a dog comes near him?
On the practical side, how can I help my son get over his fear (he was bitten by a small dog over a year ago, and since then he's been terrified of them)?
Is it wise to have them get over their fear of dogs? when we've gone abroad there have been dangerous looking stray dogs, I think it would be best if my son is afraid and doesn't approach them.

Answer 1

Mmmm. Its true what they say that a dog is what its master makes it. I grew up with dogs and as a result I love them and don't see them as anything to be scared of. My Grandmother on the other hand, was bitten when she was a child and was nervous and scared of dogs until she was an adult. What 'cured' her was a very gentle loving dog who just adored her and her confidence with dogs grew as a result.
What is your attitude to dogs? How do you react to dogs in front of your son? Does he see you patting and stroking them and getting enjoyment from them? As an adult you are bound to know someone with a loving gentle dog and perhaps if he sees how you work with the animal then his courage and confidence will get better and he will grow to realise that, like people, not all dogs are the same.
I think most responsible dog owners realise that some children may be frightened of their dog... the expression 'once bitten, twice shy' seems trite but perhaps apt... and when I was walking my dog I always made sure, that I had him on a short lead, took him to the side of the path, made him sit, if I saw a child looking nervously at him who was walking by. Most responsible dog owners know their dogs very well and trust them which is why they may seem a bit offended when confronted by a child frightened by their pet, but perhaps they need to realise that strangers don't know the animal as well as they do. Sometimes even a well trained dog can itself be frightened by a screaming child as it is not a reaction it is used to.
As for stray dogs abroad I wouldn't approach them either! But perhaps it would be better that your wee boy learn to differentiate between a friendly well trained pet than a feral stray, rather than remain frightened of all dogs. Hope I havent rambled on hehehe! Good luck!

Answer 2

Its normal for all 3 year olds to go through a stage where they become more clingy. Its natures way of keeping them out of trouble just as they are learning to walk and run, they also become suspicious of new experiences, new foods, and strangers and dogs.
Unfortunately it looks like your son was bitten during a critical stage of his development. It has made a big impression on him that will take a lot of work and patience to overcome.
I have to tell you that his reaction to dogs is neither usual nor safe; with the wrong animal him running away while screaming could provoke a serious attack.
I am going to strongly recommend that you start dealing with this immediately and get professional support. Take him to see a child psychologist that specialises in phobias.
And please contact your local police dog unit, explain the problem and ask for their help. If your son can be exposed safely and under controlled conditions to dogs he stands a better chance of dealing with this. He'll need repeat sessions over a long period of time. At first the dogs must be at what HE feels is a safe distance. He must also be shown how much control the handlers have.
He must learn that no matter how scared he feels around dogs, he must never scream or whimper, and never run.
Hopefully one day he'll be able to overcome his phobia, it must make his life a misery.

Answer 3

I am a teacher and often take my dogs into school to train children how to react to dogs. I first always say they must never approach or pet a strange dog and should be extremely cautious around any animals. I sit my two very soft labradors down and the children are told to leave them quietly alone. The children are then gathered and I tell them all about dogs, how much attention they need, how to feed them and teach them healthy respect. They are also asked how they know my dogs are safe - they've been trained etc but I still tell children to be very careful even with my dogs and not confront them. Each child then (if they want) can pet the dog after talking - I make sure I'm there at every moment. My dogs have been used in hospitals, schools and nursing homes and it has been a delight to see the sunshine they bring to all kinds of people. It would be a shame to take that opportunity away from your son as pet ownership is an incredibly rewarding experience. Fear of all dogs is unhealthy.. teach your son to be respectful and cautious for the right reasons. Have any of your friends got calm dogs you can introduce your son to?

Answer 4

I have 2 german shepherds and I get very annoyed when walking them when a child starts screaming and running from the dogs or starts jumping up and down clawing it's parents to be held because he's afraid.It's not that I have no compassion for the child or don't understand it's fear BUT I have to look at the situation from my dogs point of view.
All they see as they are distracted by the child is behavior they consider to be aggressive.Usually as the kids screaming he's looking my dogs in the eye.An open challenge.The noise the child's making along with the erratic behavior my dogs easily mistake as a threat to them.Either that or they see a child that's being allowed to act unruly,running and jumping around and they think it's an invitation to play.
And the reason it annoys me to no end is simply because people have a tendency to put their fearful children as close as they can to strange animals rather than keep them as far away as possible.I cannot count the times some fool has taken their kid to the dog park where dogs are allowed to run off-leash and had the nerve to yell at me to leash my dogs or move away cos their kid was afraid of them.
If your kid is afraid then avoid the situation!
To help the child over it's fear explain to the child that to him that the dog does'nt see a little kid the dog sees a giant andif he does'nt want the dog to think he wants to fight or play then walk CALMLY by the dog pretending it's not there at all.Don't look at the dog.Don't try to touch the dog.Don't talk to the dog.If the child is'nt jumping around erratically or acting foolish and unruly the dog will have no problem walking right on by without giving notice to the child.If he's making alot of noise and jumping around thedogs have the fear that this child will do them harm and will undoubtedly protect themselves in the only manner they can.So if you'd explain to your child that dogs are more afraid of him than he is of them and that's why he got bit to begin with.And when he sees a dog he needs to calm down and stop acting like a little heathen so the animal won't be afraid of him and he'll not have a problem.
Small dogs are especially fearful of children because no matter how small the child it's still a giant to the dog.Your child needs to show the dog that he's a gentle giant and not a mean one.

Answer 5

I have a four year old daughter.

BUT I also have four well behaved dogs.

I wouldn't ever allow a situation to develop where a child is at risk from my dogs or my dogs are at risk from a child.

Personally if I am walking my dogs down the local fields and a child runs away screaming YES I do find it slightly annoying - what would happen if my dogs saw the child and chased him/her (thank fully my dogs are under control and that wouldn't happen).

If I was you I would allow my child to get over his fear of dogs - you don't want this fear to affect him for the rest of his life do you? My daughter has been brought up with dogs but she still knows NOT to approach any other dog regardless of how friendly it seems.

Find a friendly dog - labrador etc with an owner who you know very well. Make sure it is in a calm environment. I would invite the dog and owner to your house (where your son feels safe) and then make no fuss over the situation allow your son to approach the dog etc.

You need to balance healthy respect and like - ie likes dogs but doesn't run over to any dog.

Good luck x

Answer 6

It would be good to work on getting over this without pressuring him or frightening him further. Explain carefully and as often as needed that not all dogs are mean. Hold him while a friend visits the house with a dog let him get used to one then try to move forward. Unfortunately being that afraid makes him more likely to be frightened again. Trying to get past dogs quickly, scooching past, running and all shrill excited noises are come play with me signals in dogs. Explain that staying still and calling you to come is better. You approaching does not invite a dog to run up like a boy running away. It is unlikely that getting over a fear will make him approach strays under any circumstances. Teach him the difference between dogs with their owners and loose dogs. Be patient and good luck. I hope he can recover and enjoy animals happily and that he stays safe

Answer 7

hi , i don't think you son is scared of dogs , i think he is more scared of being bitten again , and who can blame him , my son had been bitten 3 times and lucky enuf he never developed the fear , so ppl mite say get a puppy , i don't think that would b a good idea as puppy's bite and chew A LOT , and there teeth are a lot sharper , next time your out , and you see a dog with an owner why dont you speak to them and tell them about the problems you have with your son , i am a dig owner aswel as a breeder , and a mum so i can see the problem from both sides , most respectable dog owner will talk to you about your sons problem and will try to find away to help , does your son like scooby do ? you could always play with your son with a scooby toy and talk to him telling him that scooby do is a dog etc , hope you get this problem sorted , let us know thanks

Answer 8

Dog owners love their pets and take it personally when someone else doesn't feel the same way they do about their pets. What's most important is to teach your son to be smart around dogs. Of course, you should never approach a strange dog or pet a dog without asking the owner first. Most dogs really are friendly, and dogs are everywhere, so he will have to deal with them sooner or later. Also, if a dog does have aggressive tendencies, running and screaming can provoke the dog. Dogs are less likely to hurt you if they see you as calm, assertive and in control.

Answer 9

I was bitten by a dig when I was young. I tried to stroke it while it wqs asleep and it turned on me. I
t is natural for your son to be scared of dogs. Dog owners that get upset at a small child running away from a dog scared are irresponsible. As a dog owner if I see someone in the street that looks scared of my dog (adult or child) I will do my best to keep my dog right away from them. I fully understand people being afraid of dogs when they have not grown up around them.

In answer to your son over coming his fear yes he should and it is better to start early. He needs to understand that while some dogs are dangerous most are not. You should also teach him not to go up to just any animal and try to pet it.

to help him get over his fear the best thing to do is introduce him to a family or friends dog. Have the owner of the dog there holding the animal and stroking it. Show your son that the dog is ok to be around. Don't try and get him to stroke the dog or go up to it straight away. The dog will pick up on your sons fear. In stead try things like throwing a toy for the dog, feeding the dog a treat or taking it out for a walk. when your son is comfortable around the animal he will want to try to stroke it. This may take time and a number of goes. Good luck.

Answer 10

Your son should be cautious but not scared i grew up with dogs and they give more unconditional love then any creature on the planet except mothers maybe! but it is the people that own them a dog should never be blamed for it's actions it is the owner who raises them to what they are. It can cause problem i have a friend who can't go in to houses with a dog in, until he met my mums, May be introduce him to a friendly dog(most of them only want to be friends) but check that he is gentle and maybe he will just be cautious rather then scared!
My cousin has got scars all over his back from a dog when he jumped in to the back garden to get his ball at seven. The dog was protecting his home and didn't know why some one(they don't see children) was in his home. he still loves dogs and knows why it happened to him now!
Just remember they are animals!