Is my girlfriend normal?

Question

I'm 26, she's 21. We have lived together a little over 6 months. She is trying to change everything from the way I raise my kid, to how often I interact with my family, to how often I see my friends. She doesnt want me to do anything without her. I cant even drive home from work or take a lunch break without her on the phone with me the whole time. I need a little space for me sometimes, it doesnt mean I dont wanna be with her. She thinks if I want a minute to myself that I dont love her. She gets upset whenever my attention is not on her. She sends me dozens of texts while im at work. I dont reciprocate this behavior, so tell me... am I insensitve? or is she just a psycho? I'm open minded and If i need to change some things for the sake of a lasting relationship I would. But I'm beginning to think she is froot loops!

Answer 1

She is just young and insecure. You need to tell her what you just told us here. Let her read this. Sounds like she has some trust problems and it may be from past relationships or you have done something to make her think this way. Tell her in a nice way if she keeps this up it will only hurt your relationship. YOU need to talk to her about this. Everyone needs space sometimes. Good luck.

Answer 2

Listen dude I feel really sorry for you in your situation. She has obviously got some serious issues & she is draining the life out of you. Maybe someone knocked over the dolls house she made from lego bricks when she was a kid & this has caused her to get a serious inferiority complex as an adult. If you do not get away from her she will deflate your brain & cause you to have loads of serious issues & then the two of yous may get on like a house on fire but your mind will still be messed. If I was you I would take a bit of time away from her. Go to amsterdam with a few of your mates & leave your phone at home. You dont want her ringing you when your sitting happily & quite chilled out in a cafe. Best of luck & dont worry, she will get the help she needs.

Answer 3

specific, it is thoroughly regular. you're in all probability purely a splash lonely and desire somebody who is familiar with you thoroughly. properly, that's what i've got confidence like with my imaginary female buddy, and thats why I created her, as a results of fact only 3 those that i comprehend in my view comprehend that i'm bisexual and for this reason the sensation of loneliness. you have got a thoroughly diverse rationalization for having yours, however the component i'm attempting to get for the era of is that it is amazingly regular to have an imaginary female buddy. somewhat at 14. i've got had loads of imaginary girlfriends i ought to top off a city so do no longer worry! Btw, i'm 14 too, so do no longer think of its purely you :)

Answer 4

Seems you have to raise two kids instead of one.

She will definetly be more reasonable when older, but that will not happen while with you. She needs to experience that that kind of behaviour is too hard to handle, she needs to be dumped several times because of that to feel bad about it and maybe she will realize than...

If I were you I would try to talk openly with her, just tell her how much you love her and that she doesn't need to feel insecure if you want a little time for yourself. Tell her what you don't like about her behaviour and try to help her get wiser, more reasonable.

If she keeps to stay that way, you need to get rid of her, you don't want some kid to raise your child. She is psycho if she stays like that forever.

Answer 5

Dear friend,
Actually you're the one of millions who have such a loving & caring partner.
I'm in the same scenario.
Once I talked to her seriously and said that "this habit irritates me some times, please try to avoid these practices".
I don’t know how she controlled her self & stopped doing such things, but after a couple of days I realized that I’m missing something badly or I’m being ignored, I feel something is wrong somewhere.
Then I again talked to her & requested her to be as she was.
Eventually I got to the point that, actually she loves me a lot, she cares me a lot & she don’t want to lose me, she don’t want me to involve with any other girl.
She is afraid of other girls I mean she don’t wanna give me time so I could get involved with any other girl.
So, the same is with your girl, actually she loves you a lot that’s why she wants to be with you all the time even when you’re not with her physically.

Answer 6

It is quite obvious what you have to do. You need to negotiate boundaries with your girlfrind but if she refuses to negotiate or if she makes the negotiation process exceedingly difficult, then you must dictate boundaries to her and defend those boundaries with firmness, but all the while offering negotiation if she is willing to start playing fair.

At the moment your girlfriend is dictating a lot of boundaries and she is putting a lot of pressure on you whenever you try to establish boundaries of your own. And also she's blackmailing you. She accuses you of being unloving whenever you dare to challenge any of her boundaries. In your mind you tell yourself that if she perceives you as unloving, then she may stop loving you and she may leave you. And I don't think that you want her to leave just yet. But she knows what is going on in your mind. She knows exactly what she is doing. She knows that if she accuses you being unloving then you will try to fit in with her boundaries rather than risk losing her. What a *****! But then you're not doing yourself any favours either! What a wimp! If you do as I say she will try every trick in the book to manipulate you into backing down (oh my God, perhaps she is a psycho!). She may even burst into tears and cry for hours. She may throw at you accusation after accusation through her sobbing, accusing you of being heartless and really wallowing in the self pity. But do not be fooled. At some level she knows exactly what she is doing and as soon as you get her to realise that the old games will no longer work, she will have to start considering the matter of growing up (so she's immature as well!) and giving you the respect that you give her. Of course, it could all go horribly wrong. At any point one of you or both of you may decide that your partnership is beyond repair, and if that happens you will just have to split up. But my view is that if this happens then it needed to happen. Perhaps you both need a 6 months trial separation to give you both a chance to grow up and find yourselves. But sometimes the more reasonable partner (yes, you) only has to get tough for a few minutes before the needy child (yes, her) realises that the game is over and shows that she knew how to negotiate in a fair and reasonable way all along. But from her point of view she is saying, "Why work for some of what you want when there is an easy way of getting nearly all of what you want?". Your job is to stop her from pushing you around. Make a decision now. Make a decision right now, "Nobody is going to push me around ever again!". And pull yourself together if you ever notice yourself backsliding.

Martin Camden.

Answer 7

Hey your dating Toucan, Sounds like she is a control freak, I would sit down with her and voice my concerns before things go any further. If you love her tell her so and also tell her that you are seeing her because of this, Also tell her that you wanted a g/f not a mother. Good luck.

Answer 8

She sounds extremely insecure and possessive. I'd guess that she can also be very manipulative. This behavior won't change. She might modify it a bit to mollify you, give you a sense that she's "changing" but at the core she isn't and won't change.

Get out while you can. It will only get worse.

Answer 9

Yeah, it was exciting and nice in the beginning to be so much in the center of her world, right? She's insecure and is very, very fearful. Can you talk about it with her and offer to go to counseling? Probably won't get better (actually you can take that to the bank--it'll get worse) without help.

Answer 10

Your girlfriend is INSECURE! Any person that tries to change an adult is crazy. If you don't want to change for yourself that who are you changing for? My advice is let her know your stance and if she can't except where you are coming from than maybe you two need to reevaluate the relationship...oh yeah she is froot loops!