I have a date this weekend with a guy I met online and have been out with a few times but not lately. He has spent a total of 12 dollars on the dates combined. I starved on all of them. I know everyone is going to say money isn't important but I know that other people go to restaraunts and movies for dates. He has a good job and his children grown and his divorce long over. He seems cheap to me. Our date is going to be walking in the mall (keep in mind we are not teenagers) and maybe we will go to a restaraunt (a popular moderatly priced one that has good food) and eat chips and dip. I would like to have dinner since we will probably be out all evening. I will eat first to be safe but it just doesn't seem like much of a date. We are just getting to know each other so it isn't at the point where I just want to spend time with him, I would really like to get out and have a little fun and be treated like he appreciates my company. Am I unreasonable? Should this be it?
2006-08-17 15:14:37 · 10 answers · asked by reallyfedup 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's a difficult situation because he is basically a nice guy and we chat every evening but I have difficulty seeing him as a potential mate being that a cheap man is a turn off to me. I enjoy talking to him and all but I wish we could do something fun for a change. One of our dates was to an amusement park (free entry) in which we stayed for hours and ate nothing and didn't ride anything and they had an all day ride pass for only 10 dollars. I seem to only find cheapskates. I hear other women talk about where they went and see them with flowers and stuff their guy got them and can't help but be a little jealous.
2006-08-17 15:40:02 · update #1
Do you believe you're worth atleast a $10 meal from somewhere like Chili's? I'm guessing that you do. If this guy can't take you for a real meal or date, he's just not into you. Give it one more try, if he still skimps, tell him you're worth more and thanks for the lovely walk around the mall and find someone who can take you out on a real date.
2006-08-17 15:25:23 · answer #1 · answered by TW's 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can sympathize with how you feel; you want your man to treat you well and show that he wants to please you, but I also think that you are now perhaps too focused on money alone. (This is just my personal observation). By simply putting every man that doesn't spend the required amount on you into the "cheap" category, you're possibly not being as open as you could be.
Unless they're well-off and prepared to pamper you with all that you desire, you might remain pessimistic and closed off from other men who might not have the money but could potentially be the best thing that ever happened to you.
Having said that, chips and dip is pretty cheap...
If you like him and want to continue to give it a try, you have to discuss it and/or also think of things that you can do that don't cost a lot and that you can enjoy, before you banish him to Reallyfedup's Pit of Cheapskates.
2006-08-18 06:00:37 · answer #2 · answered by Cagey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a class a cheapskate? Chips and dip on a date, come on? If he has a good job their is no reason he shouldnt be whining and dining you. Sounds to me that you arent the only person on his plate. Im willing to bet their is some other girl out their getting the steak and lobster dinner, while your getting nachos and cheese from the fastfood taco stand. Not saying every date has to be a 50 dollar dinner, but so far this guy is showing you what your worth to him. Are you a diamond to him, or just a trinket from a garage sale
2006-08-17 22:23:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been broke before, but $12.00 total on two dates?!? This guy is El Cheapo Numero Uno. And he clearly doesn't have a very high opinion of you. Hint: men will work hard to impress women they really like. If he doesn't have money to spend, he'll do something else like make you a card or write you a poem (I've done both) or whatever his talents allow.
I can't tell without meeting the guy, but it's possible that he's withholding the spending in order to get sex -- some guys have a "you get what you pay for" mentality when it comes to dating.
Either way, your course is clear. Dump this loser and find a guy who treats you better.
2006-08-17 22:32:50 · answer #4 · answered by D'archangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's a simple suggestion. Just ask to change his plans, from walking around the mall to going out to dinner at a restaurant first, then going to a play or concert, some where maybe out side.
2006-08-17 22:21:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There may be something in his finances you aren't aware of yet. Maybe try talking to him about how he views money. Is he the frugal type? Is he the materistic type? Is he the type to invest? Is he the type to over spend and end up broke? You don't have to ask specifically about his finances but how does he view money. What would he do with a million dollars?
2006-08-17 22:22:10 · answer #6 · answered by acidicblackrose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not being unreasonable. You should politely ask him if he plans on ever taking you on an "adult" date. Tell him you like spending time with him,but,these past few times out do not feel like dates,they feel like a couple of teens hanging out!
2006-08-17 22:24:33 · answer #7 · answered by throatp0ker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on. You don't need to be with someone that doesn't even feed you. Or you never do anything but be bored. Move on, you can do much better.
2006-08-17 22:25:17 · answer #8 · answered by babygirl000000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you are starving one night while you are out. Maybe he will feed you more than chips and dip?...?
2006-08-17 22:21:12 · answer #9 · answered by guitargirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dumo this cheap skate. if he is poor then at elast he could take you to burger king for the doller menu. you can do better.
2006-08-17 22:20:13 · answer #10 · answered by manyhartz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋