How can one tell if someone is abused?

Question

I'm worried that it's happening to one of my friends, but I don't really know... how can I tell? What are normal signs?

Answer 1

Child's Appearance:
Has torn, stained, or bloody underclothing; Experiences pain or itching in the genital area; Has bruises or bleeding in external genitalia, vagina, or anal regions; Has a sexually transmitted disease; Has swollen or red cervix, vulva, or perineum; Has semen around mouth or genitalia or on clothing; Is pregnant.

Child's Behavior:
Appears withdrawn or engaged in fantasy or infantile behavior; Begins wetting or soiling the bed; Has poor peer relationships; Is unwilling to participate in physical activities; Is engaging in delinquent acts; Reports sexual abuse; Engages in inappropriate sexualized behavior; Devalues sexual acts and acts sexually permissive; Fears a certain person or certain places; Gives an unusual or unexpected response when asked if he or she was touched by someone; Has an unreasonable fear of a physical exam; Creates drawings that show sexual acts or that seem overly focused on sexual body parts; More knowledge about sex than is normal for the child's age; Pain, bruising, or bleeding in the genitals; Seems preoccupied with or overly concerned about sexual acts and words; Runs away.

Caretaker's Behavior:
Extremely protective or jealous of child; Encourages child to engage in prostitution or sexual acts; Has been sexually abused as a child; Is experiencing marital difficulties; Misuses alcohol or other drugs; Is frequently absent from home; Has difficulty in interacting emotionally with adults.

Answer 2

If your friend is alienating herself from family and friends because a lot of times the abuser don't won't them to have any contact with anyone because they are afraid they will be figured out. Acourse if she acts afraid or intimidated by him and feels she must walk on egg shells. If she is always making excuses for his irrational behavior when it can be clearly seen by everyone that he is being a complete jerk. And if she gets unexplainable bruises and the excuses she gives for them doesn't add up. She may also change her style of dress and wear clothes to cover up because sometimes the abuser will try to make the victim feel like they are looking like a slut even if they are wearing regular clothes. Those are just a few. Good luck in helping your friend.

Answer 3

you can't. It's different with everyone. But mostly its either unexplained bruises on face, body (physical).

Or...

Decreased contact with people, depression, complete change in personality, extreme changes in things talk'd about (i.e., from pokemon to drugs), um...what else...i think that is it. O yea maybe they get really irritable easily. And secretive. Very secretive. Like their life suddenly becomes classified. And...if you ask what happened?, they lie, tell outrageous reasons, or say "sick", "had to go to doctor"....See? normal responses become suspicious as you do not know 100% that the person is telling the truth...

OR....

BOTH! which is very serious...contact other friends, or deal with your friend yourself, but very cautiously. Ask parents too. They have been on this Blue Planet longer than you have. They've seen more stuff, and (probably) did more stuff than you have...unless you are nearing high school o_O. anyways...yeh good luck with that. Hope your friend feels better O_o

Answer 4

I'm not sure what type of abuse you think your friend is experiencing but the signs are rather the same. Look for your friend not being involved in the same activities as before, may be more tired, grades are fluctuating in school, loss of appetite, generally not talking as much (if at all).

I hope your friend is going to be ok. If you think she's being abused, please tell someone and get her help.

Answer 5

isolation, is she being isolated? does she seem to be withdrawing from normal activities? does she minimize her partners behavior? does he/she seem possessive or even obsessive? has she or her partner been in previous abusive relationships? these are some of the first signs to abuse, however they may not always be apparent. The most important thing is to, no matter what, support her. She can only keep herself safe and only she knows how to do this, but with your support she may be able to realize this. contact a local domestic violence agency about more warning signs and things to say to support victims involved in domestic violence. the best one i can think of right now is i am scared for you, because more often than not it is the truth!!

Answer 6

depression. solitude, wanting to talk but saying nothing, or acting up, not wanting to be a t school, not wanting to go home.

there are alot of different signs and every-ones case is different depending on the age of your friend you need to talk to her and try getting the right story out of her if it-as sexually abused be care ful about what you tell you never know if its true OR not and you don't wantrn to make mistakes, just be there for her and always ask never give up

Answer 7

see if they will look you in the eye and do they avoid talking to you if the other person is there do things seem to be too good between them according to her i just got out of one of those relationships if you ask she will tell you no that shes not being abused but she wont meet your eyes does she go anyplace without him or is she allowed to talk on the phone does he make all the decisions for them sorry this is rambling but these are all tell tale signs

Answer 8

There are very few normal signs. If they have poorly explained physical markings then that would be an obvious one. I suggest just coming out and asking them. That might help. Let them know you can help.

Answer 9

If she/he does not want to discuss it with you let her/him be.

Please just be there for her/him with friendship,love and support.

They will open up to you if you don't push things I am sure

Please try to get them help without damaging friendship

Talk to someone who has experience in these matters

You will not have to stress then that you didn't tell someone.

They may be able to investigate discreetly and help.

I hope things improve for you and your friend

You did not mention age.

Abuse is an abomination of human rights at any age

.

Answer 10

theres the ovious physical signs black eyes scars on the neck and back if she wears sunglasses at times when they arent needed thats something to question does she wear layers of clothing now versus her normal skimpy clothes possibly trying to cover up bruises is she distant makes up excuses for why she cant hang with you when she is with you do she get nervous or jumpy when he calls her cellphone is she constantly calling him and letting him know her every move. these are all signs of it talk to her tell her that she can trust you and get her to report him everytime he touches her build a case on him that way when he trys to hurt hre again tell her to use the old boiling grits routine and burn his ***. self defense, think about it.