if there are 2 guys in your life.. both loves you.. you love the first guy, he loves you back (good right?), then the other guy you also love him and he loves you more than you'll ever love him and he wants to marry you. to complicate it the first guy is your bf but he doesnt even think of your future together with him, he just wants to think about now and his career. the other guy has planned his future with you and would do anything to win your heart. to complicate it more, both are far from you, the first guy lives about 2 hrs from you the other guy is halfway across the world but will be back after 6 months or a year the most just to see you again and marry you if you choose him. the first guy knows you but not as much as the other guy, coz the other guy has been inlove with u secretly and just knowing you. who would you choose? what if even though the first guy's like that you feel like you'd regret more if you lose him? who would you choose? the first guy or the other guy?
2006-08-17 07:28:06 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
thank you for the answers so far.. i am so grateful.. yes i am confused.. until now i am.. i am at an age that needs to know what i really want in my life..coz i'm not getting any younger.. and i may not have this chance in my life again..
2006-08-17 07:51:55 · update #1
I am asking this now.. not because i'm cheating them.. the first guy (the bf) knows nothing of the other guy's feelings although i know he felt it when he met him before.. i, on the other hand, had no idea of it.. i found out just months ago.. the other guy became my santuary when my bf and i fight. my bf and i broke up 2 months ago.. now we got back together which made the other guy felt bad.. now he wants to let me go and let me be happy with the relationship i have now. that made me think of all these things.. i was alarmed that i'm going to lose someone who loves me and willing to sacrifice for me.. which only i know of.. i wish i'd know what my heart tells me.. i wish i could see things in black and white.. not like this.. once again thank you for your answers..
2006-08-17 07:58:31 · update #2
if you love then both the same - choose the one who loves you better ...not the most
2006-08-17 07:34:44 · answer #1 · answered by Caramel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't choose either. Staying with a man who loves you even though you have no feelings for him is only going to hurt him. I know that it will be very hard to let go of the first guy, but if he is ready to leave you for someone else, it is not likely that he feels the same as you do. Staying with him is only going to hurt you more. Try to find someone else you can love who will also love you. You deserve that much.
2016-03-16 23:21:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey. That's a tough one! I can say this though; if you and the bf fight that's never good. Especially if you never resolve anything. And if you lean on the other guy who loves you when you fight, that's not fair cuz you're giving him possibly false hope.
If things are rocky with the bf, tell him you need a break. Break it off. Tell him there are things you're not sure about and you're thinking of the future. You need to figure out what you want in life before you waste anymore of his time.
Tell the 2nd guy that you need to think this over. He's been so patient and you're going to figure it out. You need to do it before he hauls his butt halfway around the world to win you over too. Tell both of them you will know soon. See who you miss more. See who you think of more. You will realize who you actually love and want to spend the rest of your life with if you distance yourself enough to think clearly. You can't recognize emotions for someone if you're trying to balance a boyfriend and another possibility at the same time. It's not cool to keep what sounds like a really great guy (or possibly 2 really great guys) around as a safety net. You need to figure this out. You need to quit putting it off. It kind of sounds to me like you like having 2 guys pine after you. Keep it up much longer though, and you will lose both of them.
Not to mention if you're accepting all these messages of love from the 2nd guy and not telling your boyfriend you're not being a very faithful girlfriend are you? The most important thing is not to go against who you are and what you want. To be blunt, you don't have 2 simultaneous loves of your life. It's just not natural.
2006-08-25 04:22:53 · answer #3 · answered by Cassiopeia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Woah, woah, woah, huh? This is a pretty tangled situation here. Do these guys know about each other? Sounds like you've got some pretty big decision making here. My suggestion: tell your boyfriend he needs to "**** or get off the pot," which means he needs to talk to you about your future plans together or you're outtie. As for the other guy, he lives half way across the world! Wait till he gets back and have a rational discussion about your relationship. Remember honey, marriage is a HUGE step. Evaluate both situations, weigh the pros and cons, and cut your losses. Unfortunately you can't make everyone happy, one guy is gonna feel like crap, that's just the way it goes. Watch YOUR back, that's what's important.
2006-08-17 07:41:06 · answer #4 · answered by doggiestar44 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The one that is halfway across the world makes it sound real good but he could just be saying this and then if you did take a chance to be with him he breaks your heart in the future. and the one that is closest to you, if you guys are both young maybe you should listen to what he is saying he wants a career which is good because in the long run the establshment could help the both of you and if you choose to hang in there with him it could benefit in the future. But it is a hard decision and good luck on your choice.
2006-08-25 07:32:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should choose the guy you love
2006-08-25 00:41:09 · answer #6 · answered by prince 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok number one thing to think about... why are you loving 2 guys for?? why is there 2 guys in the picture?? you should only love and be with only 1 guy not 2.. is the other guy in the service. have you been with him before. if so why are you with the 1st guy
2006-08-24 16:20:30 · answer #7 · answered by lkwood39 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wowie. that tough.
well out of instinct i say the guy you love. but if there is not ever going to be a future with you two then move on.
but if there is someone who loves you so much, youd probably break his heart so badly. (just think about his feelings if you choose the other guy)
but if you did choose the guy you love and it didnt work out, do you think that the other guy would still want you?
and, if you did end up losing the guy who loves you so much, would you be sad and wish you made a different decision?
things to think about: the other guys feelings and yours if you lost one of them
2006-08-17 07:42:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
follow your heart. if you love the first guy, but he doesn't necessarily want a future with you, he may not be the one. i wouldn't just choose the 2nd guy only because he loves you. you have to love him too. otherwise, you won't be happy. the right guy is probably the third guy. go out and find him.
2006-08-17 07:41:33 · answer #9 · answered by SheShe13 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you love these two guys at the same time. you must be confused.. imagine that, you start to be with second guy (you left first one).. maybe you will meet someone who love you much and better than second one? what will you do ??
love makes people blind but i think you are not blind.. try to fix your relation you are in.. if you cant, leave him for yourself, not for second one or someone else.. stay alone for a while then look for someone.. otherwise, you are pity..
2006-08-17 07:43:45 · answer #10 · answered by atisun 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋