HOW to tell my BROTHER the TRUTH.............?

Question

i still have yet to meet my mother, after ll these years, btu i speak to her often. i wan to tell my brother, btu i dont know how he will take it.all our lives we were taught that our mother was a bad person, but now that i talk to her so often i cant see how thats true, adn i knwo the truth about the divorce and that my family lied to me. so i want to tell my brother that i talk to her, adn maybe he will take me to see her, because i still dont have my lisence.but little did i know that, my brother had met my cousin from my moms side. adn had asked her anything, but said to her he had no interst in meeting my mom, and didnt knwo wich story to belive hers, or my familys. he told my couisn that i ouldnt be so open adn forgiving to the situation like he was, and that i would tell my father. but now im the one who is doing so much more, i secretly talk to my mom everyday, adn i want him to know, maybe hell talk to her too,im not sure,hopefully hell find out what a great person she is.

we lived with my aunt adn grandma, they didnt like my mom, she as very protective of us, adn she wanted to move away from them, adn i know for a fact my grandmother is crazy, i didnt need her to tell me that , so i understand. we had apparently moved to gergia for a while, but my aunt and grandma convinced my dad to leave my mom, or maybe the feelings just werent there anymore.so she was pretty much shunned from my family cuz she didntliek living with them, my family really is crazy , my mom was gonn aheva miscarrige so they hung her upside down , to stop it, it almost killed her.she won us in court. adn we lived ina homeless shelter. her family wouldnt take us in,thats how things were in the old days.my dad begged er to let us stay with him,adn she made him promise to let her see usat a place where they had visitaions like that.but my dad ended the visitaions and took my bro to a therapist. we never saw her again, and were only told bad things about her, i guess to cover up the truth

Answer 1

family should ALWAYS be honest w/each other.
But then again it depends on the circumstances.Was she abusive or cruel?Did she break some "family rule"?The reason for your family not wanting to be around her could lie in the reason for the divorce.
Just out of curiosity,what the heck happened to cause such a family rift?

Answer 2

The fact of the matter is that your father has his side and your mother has hers... the truth usually lies in between. If you've reconciled with your mother, that's great. All you can do is try to talk to your brother and hope that he'll at least try to talk with your mother. But if he doesn't, then you need to respect that as well. He may have completely different feelings about her than you do... even if he decides to talk to her.

In regards to meeting your mom, you need to just get that out in the open. If your mom is such a great person, then there's no reason to keep it a secret... no matter what your family has said to you about the divorce. Once that's out, then you, your father and your mother can figure out a way for you to visit her. You're not doing yourself any favors by keeping it a secret and hopefully your mother isn't encouraging you to do so. If everything's out in the open, there's no reason for you to hide your relationship.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Well, maybe you could soften him up a bit by talking about how you wish you could meet your mom and find out the truth.
However, you should be aware that some people can make you see what they want.
It could be that the family is just mad at your mom. Please be aware that it could be true. But I think its best if you do see her face to face and use good judgement.
She is your mother, and you need to love/respect her.
i hope you get to see her.

Answer 4

Believe what you want to about your mother.you family should never have bad mouthed your mother to you.that was not their right.It puts you in situations like this.You should have believed the simple truth all along that both of your parents loved you very deeply.If you want to see your mother then go see her.Tell your brother if you would like but u can do it urself.if u have a job u can buy a bus ticket to go see her.hope everything turns out ok.

Answer 5

maybe you need to meet her first, and find out how YOU feel about her, and then talk to him. see, when you talk on the phone, or via the Internet, you kinda feel how you WANT to feel, then upon really meeting, AND spending some time together, you get a better 'feel'. Maybe your brother is right, and you just need to find that out for yourself, and maybe you are right, but find out first, then let him know your feelings.

Answer 6

You're probably going to have to tell him eventually, so you might as well just tell him. Tell him how you feel about your mom. Ask him to respect your feelings, as you will respect his feelings. He's probably just protective of you and concerned you'll get hurt. Just tell him that you are aware of the consequences if your mom hurts you. Don't expect him to talk to your mom, just let it happen naturally. Maybe one day he'll decide that it's time to talk to her.

Answer 7

yes you need to tell him the truth and you need to exactly find out what happened. I can tell you one thing there can never be bad mothers.

Answer 8

you need to talk to your brother about the truth but you have to take it no in rush. slowly but sure...he needs time to accept the truth since he is confusing....if possible when you talk to your mom please involve him.